5 Easy Ways to Find The Perfect Mentor

0:00 Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast. The only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, money, women, and being a fucking man without making any apologies for it. I'm your host, Mark Sing. And I'm John Anthony. And today we are going to talk about how to choose a mentor, how to choose a teacher, and how to basically choose the right person so that you're not led astray and so that you're led into the area which you want to go. So now we literally decided to talk about this about 23.5 seconds ago and I was telling John, I'm like, I don't really know how much I have to say about this other than, so I'm going to just blow my load right now and hopefully more comes to me as we're talking.

0:43 But one of the big things I look for is whether or not that person is successful in the way that I want to be successful. And the way I want to be successful is I want to be a positive, inspired, and obviously I want to maximize myself where my body is concerned, my health, my finances, my spirituality, my ability with women. And when I look at somebody, for example, John and I both shared the same coach. It's an NLP coach. NLP is Neuro Linguistic Programming. And the first time I spoke to him, you know, I made sure that he is succeeding in all these areas.

1:21 And he is. I mean, the guy is an absolute total champion. Really respect him. He's probably about 20 years older than me and 40 years older than John. So he has a lot of life experiences. And you just have to kind of feel what this person is doing in their lives. And another big thing is how they take adversity. Because I think when adversity comes, that really shows the person's true character. And you should ask that person, well, what failures have you had? You know, if people are just hitting home runs their whole life, it's easy to be a mentor in that respect when you're just always succeeding.

1:53 But how many times have you failed? I mean, as for me personally, I have failed a ton. And the real question is, what do you do when you fail? Do you get up and keep going? Or do you give up and feel sorry for yourself? And so when picking a mentor, just try to see what his track record is. And if there's a lot of failure and he's still doing well, well, I think that's probably the most important thing you can look for because it shows character.

2:20 Character in adversity is the biggest test of character a man can have. Abraham Lincoln once said, the greatest way to judge a man's character is to give him power. And I agree with that for sure. But I also think the greatest way to judge a man's character is to watch how he behaves through adversity. So basically, see where you want to go, see who you want to be, and choose a person who is already that person and have them mentor you. So that's kind of my first tip as to how to choose a mentor correctly.

2:51 I would agree. Yeah. The biggest thing when it comes to learning a new skill is you can always 10 extra progress when you find someone who has what you want and you just do what they do. So Tony Robbins and a bunch of other NLP coaches call this modeling, where you basically just find someone who's good at something and you just do what they do. So learning to find a good coach or a good mentor, a good model is probably one of the biggest factors of success and learning a new skill, you know.

3:21 And of course, people have trouble doing that, right? People have trouble finding a mentor, especially nowadays, because anyone who has a computer can get online, start a website and position themselves as an expert. So there's a lot of scammers, a lot of bullshit advice, a lot of stupid, just flat out lies, you know, that people try to sell as working effectively. And, you know, funny enough, actually, I had someone, I just did a live Q&A on YouTube and I had someone ask me what I thought of Ross Jeffries, who was an old school PUA.

3:56 I know him. Yeah, so you know, like, I didn't know what to say. I know that he does like NLP, like to like hypnotize women. And I just, I was kind of like turned off by that. What do you, what do you think about him out of curiosity? I've, I've worked with him. Oh, really? Yeah. I interviewed him once and he's an asshole. Really? He is an asshole straight up. I mean, even on the phone with me, I was like, bro, like he's just a dick.

4:19 And he seems, he seems really unhappy to me now. Um, one of the things I try to be careful of is to say, you know, outright deterministic statements like that, because everybody is multifaceted and multilayered, but he definitely him specifically, he definitely has a reputation in the industry. And I was very turned off by him. And that's another thing when, when you're going for a mentor, see how you feel when the person speaks. Does it make you feel good? Does the person speak from a place of compassion, of a place of love, or is the person in their ego and like insulting other people and ripping on others and saying others are pieces of shit?

4:57 I mean, just like I did to Ross Jeffries, but I feel he's a specific case, you know? Yeah. But the one thing that Eckhart Tolle says is that egos are drawn to bigger egos. So there are a lot of mentors out there and spiritual gurus and, you know, financial gurus who have a big following, but it's basically resonating on the energy of an ego being drawn to a bigger ego. So what I look for is somebody who operates from a place of compassion, a place of love, someone who would rather help you than get your money, someone who cares more about your progress than their progress almost.

5:33 And that's where their fulfillment comes from. And you can tell the first time, you know, the first time you get on with the coach, you're usually going to, it's usually going to be kind of an interview and he's going to be, okay, what are you interested in? And then you can ask him certain questions, you know, like tell me a little bit about your experience. Why do you do this? What's your purpose for being a coach? And a lot of coaches will give you these kinds of consultations that take, you know, 15 minutes.

5:59 Sometimes I'll do that. And, you know, even on podcasts, you can listen to how this person behaves. You can check out their website. You can learn a lot about a person just by kind of listening to them speak and just listen to your own heart. Like, is this person a good person and have they really achieved success or are they just saying they did so that they can sell you more shit? Yeah. And that's, that's one. So you touched on a lot of really important things there that I kind of want to comment on.

6:28 The first one is, uh, you know, like when we were talking about Ross Jeffries, uh, you know, I did again, I, to be clear, I haven't really worked with them or I don't know him that well, but from what I can tell, a lot of his products are just basically like learn how to hypnotize a girl with NLP. And, uh, that to me, just like, if you're trying to learn game and trying to get good with women, that's just the exact wrong frame to be coming from.

6:52 Because literally what you're, what you're saying when you fucking, you know, try to do that is like, I'm not good enough and I need to use some, like some manipulation to keep her here. And, um, to be fair, you know, a lot of guys start off in the pickup industry like that because we, you know, don't feel good about our ourselves and don't have self-esteem. But ideally the only way to actually get good with women in my experience is to become a better man. And it's just that simple, you know, learn about what women are attracted to learn about what they, you know, the signs they give you of, of interest and of disinterest, learn about yourself, learn how to, you know, be so in this, in this course that we're launching alpha evolution, we talk about the alpha male characteristics, you know, so learn to embody these alpha male characteristics like being congruent, being self-amused, being present, right?

7:42 Having masculine energy and knowing what you want, being decisive, right? The only way to generally and genuinely get good with girls is to become a better man and to, you know, go through this process, right? And so any, any marketer or quote unquote mentor or quote unquote expert who's trying to tell you that there's some massive shortcut that you can fucking take. Just say these three words and, and get in her fucking pants and fuck her in the pussy. Like that's just such bullshit. Like it's, it's not true.

8:10 And, um, so that was the first point that I wanted to touch upon. And the second one that Mark said is they'll almost care more about your success than like their own, than their own success than taking your money. And, um, you know, that's how, uh, that's how, you know, someone is a genuinely good mentor, I think is when they give away a lot of free information, you know? Um, cause I mean, you know, Mark and I, we do these podcasts and we give away so much free shit that we could literally bottle up in a course and sell to you for, for $20 or whatever, but we just give it away because we like talking about this.

8:42 We'd like helping people. And of course we have our premium content if you want to pay for it so that we can make a fucking living. But we also like giving out free stuff. And, um, a lot of these people that, you know, you think might be mentors, uh, they're, you know, like for example, um, someone asked this question during the live Q and a, and they said, you know, who do you think the good, the good fitness people are to follow on YouTube? And, uh, you know, I'm not going to name names, but there's a lot of them where it's like, you look at their content and they'll have something where it's titled like, you know, the truth about intermittent fasting, how to, how to shred, uh, you know, shred fat and build muscle.

9:18 And their, their video is like a five minute intro of them, like looking jacked and bragging about their lives. And then like another 10 minutes of like hyping up that they're going to teach you some secret. And then they just tell you to buy their products. And like, they don't, they don't actually fucking tell you like what you came there to learn. You know, it's good marketing, but it doesn't actually teach you anything. And the people that are actual good mentors, they'll usually have free content that they give away because they have so much knowledge.

9:45 They have such an abundance of knowledge that they're fine with just giving a lot of it away, you know? So look for people that give away free information. They're not stingy because if they're stingy with their information, it means they don't have that much. So they're not actually a fucking expert, you know? Yeah. And, um, another side note I wanted to say is that, um, when the student is ready, the teacher will come. And it's the same thing as a teacher. I'm, I'm a seduction coach.

10:11 It was interesting because when I was ready, then all my students. And so many times you're going to find somebody just by the law of attraction who is exactly where you need him to be for your level. Now, it might not be the absolute best teacher in the world, but oftentimes if you just have a genuine intent, if you put it out there and, and really the law of attraction does work when you put an intention out there and saying, I am being mentored by a great teacher, then he's going to come he or she, he or she is going to show up into your life and it's going to show up at the perfect time.

10:45 I mean, um, I have several mentors, but one specifically just showed up at just absolutely the right time. It was an absolute perfect fit. So many times when you ask, well, how do I find a good teacher? Simply put the intention out there because this is, this is a really spiritual thing. When teachers and students unite, improving yourself is a really spiritual thing. And oftentimes if you have a genuine intention, then your teacher is going to have a genuine intention too. And one, one quality as well that I look for in a teacher and I try to have myself, which I don't have naturally, but I do try to work on it is humility, the humility to know that even though I am a teacher, I'm still a student and I'm a student first.

11:28 The first thing I am as a student and my growth is paramount. I actually, it's funny because last night I was going through and I was writing down my intentions and I always write down my purpose and you know, your purpose might change through your life, but it's important to know what your purpose is. And for me specifically, my purpose is to develop as a human being and help other men do the same thing to develop as a human being. So I'm humble enough to know that I am not, I have not arrived.

11:56 I'm humble enough to know that I certainly have progress to make. I'm humble enough to know that when I just stuttered saying humble enough to know, I need to work on that. And a teacher who is constantly trying to improve himself, constantly reading, constantly trying to improve himself like Mr. John Anthony here. I mean, this guy devours more self-development information than I've ever seen from anybody in my life. And consequently, he's a great teacher because he's a student first. So someone with the humility to know that they have room to grow, somebody who admits their mistakes and says, Hey, you know, I have, I have progress to make in this, in this area.

12:34 And then somebody who puts your development even before theirs, well, that's a great teacher. You're going to grow immensely if you pair with somebody like that. Yeah. Yeah. That's, that's so critical as being a student because like, you know, once I just think that once you like think that you have it all, you know, once you like think that you're just the master and you've arrived, that's the second that you start to stagnate and get egotistical and you're just not a teacher, you know? Yeah. You know, it's funny because like with doctors, for example, I, correct me if I'm wrong, but I think that in order to be a doctor, you have to like go to these like seminars, like every few years that like catch you up to like any advancements in the medical community because they understand that like, it doesn't matter if you've been a doctor.

13:18 For, for 30, 40 years, like there's always going to be progress. There's always improvements. There's always things that are changing new understandings. And, uh, you know, if you have a teacher that doesn't get coaching himself and that doesn't constantly learn, that's a major red flag for me. You know, like some guys are surprised when they hear that I like, you know, pay other people, you know, like, like Mark, our NLP coach, you know, like I pay people hundreds and hundreds of dollars an hour to coach me. They're surprised, you know, but it's like, I'm not some master.

13:50 I'm not some guru. I'm just a fucking guy that's like learning shit and applying it and sharing it with people, you know? And that's, that's like, I like how you said too, about, uh, how egos get are attracted to bigger egos because like, that's what a lot of this, this stuff is. Sometimes it's like, it's just some guy who has like a gigantic fucking ego and he thinks that he's right. And then like, because of that, like people naturally feel that confidence and they, they kind of get tricked into thinking that he knows something.

14:15 But you know, if you, if you, you'll be able to feel that, like you said, like you'll be able to feel like, I know that when I talk to someone, I know instantly if I can learn from them or not, you know? And, uh, the way again, you know, I learn is, is, uh, you know, does this person have my best intentions in mind is he just, you know, as he's some dick, like what, like who is this person, you know? And if you ask yourself how you feel when you're talking to them, then, uh, you know, that'll, that'll answer a lot of your questions.

14:42 And, uh, yeah, sorry. Um, it's important to have a teacher and we're glad you clicked on this link because only a person who understands the value of having a mentor of having a teacher of trying to improve would even click on this video to begin with. And I have a feeling this might be one of our more poorly performing videos because a lot of people perhaps think that they are done or perhaps think that they don't need to learn. But if you clicked on this, you're already in the right mentality because I intend to have coaches even until I'm 111 years old, which by the way, is my aim.

15:19 That's how old I want to get to is 111. And I fully believe I can do it. Um, but I'm going to have coaches my whole life. And, you know, we don't talk about the competition often, but one teacher who I really respect is Owen from real social dynamics. Yeah. And I recently heard that he spends about 25,000 to $30,000 a month, a month guys on self-development. He does voice lessons. He does acting lessons. He does all kinds of stuff that, you know, we're not privy to. He has a spiritual coach, all these kinds of things.

15:48 And, um, I would love to get to that level as well. You know, I don't make as much money as he does yet, but I intend to invest that much in myself too. I was recently speaking to a, um, a guy who helps people like me who have problems with their, their joints. Like I have a sacroiliac joint problem. I met him at gold's gym and he's like, this is how much I charge an hour. And he's like, you know, I know it's a little bit much, but that because I'm good.

16:13 I'm like, Oh, I have no issue with that. I'll invest in myself. And also, by the way, when you invest in yourself, it's a tax write-off, especially when you're an entrepreneur. So write that shit off. Who would you rather give it to the government or invest it in yourself? That's the way I think about it. So all my coaching with the NLP coach, with my other mentors, um, you know, any kind of jujitsu, anything else that I do, I don't, I don't know if I'm going to, I don't, I'm not able to write off jujitsu, unfortunately, but any of those kinds of things you can write off because you're investing in yourself and yourself is your business.

16:46 So that's one really good reason to be an LLC and to have your own entrepreneurship is because you can, you can invest in yourself without having to pay for it per se. You can use it as a tax write-off. But, but again, the fact that you clicked on this video shows that you understand the importance of a mentor. You understand the importance of coaching. So go with your heart, man. I mean, I know it's, I know it's not the most direct, uh, tangible advice, but in this kind of thing, I really think our heart understands who's the right teacher is for us because I really think it's a spiritual level type of, um, understanding.

17:24 And if you just listen to it, if he feels wrong, don't do it. If it feels right, do it. And I'm telling you, if you invest in yourself, you know, my coaching is a little bit expensive, it's a hundred an hour, but my students get amazing results. Like with each session. I mean, I was just telling you guys last week that one of my students got laid for the first time. All my students are getting great results with women because that's the part of their life that they're ready to get solved.

17:50 And when you do invest in a good coach, you can get it solved really fast. Now we didn't, and can't you, don't they, uh, don't they text you too? Yeah, they, I give them some texting access to me. Yes. So, um, coincidentally, I enjoy texting with women. I'm, I'm pretty good at it. I will say. And, um, yeah, they've had a lot of good success because basically I'll text, I'll text with the girl for them. And then, you know, cause a lot of guys struggle with texting.

18:15 But one of the things we did with the alpha, alpha evolution home bootcamp, which by the way, is launching this Thursday, November 15th at 2 PM Eastern time. This podcast should be coming on on Wednesday, so probably 24 hours to go. By the time you hear this, we are giving you access to us directly through a discord app where you can ask us questions. And I'm telling you at the price that we're asking for that, it's absolutely amazing to have access to two really good coaches. I mean, you know, I'm a coach, but I would pay probably 10 times that amount just to get access to Mr.

18:47 John Anthony over there, um, in Virginia, because this dude really knows his stuff. And listen, there's many times when I asked John advice and he asked me advice, what should I text this girl? You know, what should I do in this situation? Because he has knowledge that I don't have. I have knowledge that he doesn't have. So when you have partners, you can get advice from them. And dude, I even think that a bum on the street still has something to teach you. I think that everybody has something to teach you.

19:15 And if you just shut up and listen, everybody can be your mentor because everybody has wisdom and experiences that you don't have. So shut up and listen. You have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Listen. Yeah, I would agree. And even if it's what not to do, you know, you can always learn something from someone, right? Um, that being said, if you're trying to learn a specialized skill, the thing to keep in mind is like, has this person actually shown me proof that they have what I'm trying to get, you know?

19:44 So with, uh, for example, you know, with, with trading cryptocurrencies, that's a big thing that I do when, and, uh, you know, a lot of people are getting into nowadays, um, there's a lot of channels out there on YouTube where people, you know, they, they act like they know what they're talking about, what they're doing, but they don't make any of their trades or, or, you know, anything like that public. Right. Like there was this one guy, um, who actually funny enough, I, uh, you know, uh, inside of me, I debate whether or not to name them, but the shit that they do is so unethical that I have to name, uh, Tanner J Fox and, uh, crypto Nick.

20:17 So last year during 2017, these motherfuckers, they want to make 95% of their money from selling courses on how to quote unquote trade cryptocurrencies and by recommending Ponzi schemes. And they would, you know, they, they had so much money that they could afford a Lamborghini and then that would get more people into buy their shit. Cause people would see it. They say, you know, Oh, this guy has Lamborghini. He must be rich. He knows what he's talking about, but they would literally recommend Ponzi schemes. For, you know, they did that for six months and then finally Bitconnect, the Ponzi scheme collapsed.

20:49 They deleted, they scrubbed all the videos on their fucking channel, recommending this stuff and, and made away with millions of dollars, you know? So if they can't actually show you, here's what I bought, here's when I sold it, this is what I'm doing. Then don't fucking listen to them. They're, they're trying to scam you. You know, I just, I get really pissed off about that because God knows how many people lost their life savings to some asswipe on fucking YouTube who said, you know, yeah, but, you know, buy Bitconnect, it's, it's going to go to the moon.

21:17 And then they, they trusted them and then they lost all their fucking money. Um, you know, so, so keep that in mind. Like that's why with Bitcoin millionaire, I fucking, I put all my trades publicly and the, the chat group that we have going on, I'll put them on Twitter sometimes if I, if I, you know, say something or, or think something, sometimes I'll put things on YouTube if, you know, like I'll talk about how I, uh, you know, trades that I made and things like that.

21:39 You know, I, I, I try to put proof out there and, uh, anyone who's actually an expert, they won't mind putting proof out there. They don't, they don't have any issues with putting proof out there and giving you proof that they know what they're talking about and they know what they're doing. But the people that aren't the experts that, that, you know, are just trying to scam you of their money. Anytime you ask them something, they'll, they'll get really squirrely and kind of like not really talk about it and they'll, they'll dance around the subject.

22:04 But you know, like the, I mean the experts, they'll show you what they're fucking doing. Like they don't, they don't have any issue with that, you know? So keep that in mind. Like you want to, you want to see proof that they've gotten what you want to achieve. Another important thing is that there is so much information on YouTube and Vimeo and I mean the internet, right? It's like every time I have a question and I look up something on my cell phone, I always say, let me consult the Oracle because the Oracle is the cell phone.

22:30 It knows everything, but here's the deal. Not everything on there is accurate. So you have to, you know, um, access your shit filter and filter out what doesn't feel right. And that's just what it is. You can read an entire book. You don't have to believe everything that's said in the book. You don't have to buy into everything. Um, you can take some things that feel right for you and that work good for you and throw out the other things. And it even comes, you know, sometimes with coaching like, Hey, my style of picking up women isn't ideal for every single guy that I teach.

23:02 And if, if I sense that they need a different style, they need something else, then, you know, you can pivot and teach them things that's going to work for their specific personality. And again, I hate to keep coming back to the alpha evolution home bootcamp, but we give that opportunity to do that. And that's why we think that it's such a great course is because it's customizable to your unique personality. You know, I'm very, I joke around a lot with girls. I like to banter with girls.

23:29 I tell, like, say a lot of funny shit, um, being very playful, but for some guys that just doesn't work because that's not naturally in their personality. I happen to have a coaching client right now who just isn't that way. So there's ways to change the teaching to accommodate the student. So if somebody is trying to turn you into little clones of them, that's another warning sign of not a good teacher. But if it says, Hey, we're going to, we're going to mold this to your unique personality.

23:56 We're going to work with what you have, and we're going to delve into your specific sticking points. Then that's a really green flag that you should be looking for because you're a unique guy. You're a unique person. You need specific teaching on unique things. And if somebody says, no, no, no, no, no, it's this way or the highway. Um, I think that's a big red flag. Yeah, I would agree. Um, you know, the, the mark of a good teacher is that they can give you advice that applies to your situation, you know, and, um, even better too, if they've, if they've been in the situation that you are in and they've gotten out, then that's, that's a major, major, uh, you know, sign that you should listen to them.

24:35 You know, there's, there's some people out there, Mark and I were talking about, uh, one of them in particular who, uh, you know, they've never had to, they'd have never had a problem getting girls in their life. And now they, they try to teach people how to get girls, you know, but it's like, you don't, you don't like, yeah, you're like, yeah, I know. Uh, you don't, you don't want to like listen to them because it's, that's like, if you're talking to someone who's always been, who was born into a rich family and they inherited millions of dollars and you're like, Hey man, like what's your financial advice?

25:03 Like they, they don't know cause they never had to work for it. You know, but Mark and I, like we haven't always been successful. We never, you know, we're born into this, this like life of abundance. Like we had to work for it. So that's who you want to listen to is the people that actually have to work for the shit that they're teaching you how to get because they know how to get it because they didn't always have it. Right. They had to learn how to get it.

25:22 You know, I'm a, uh, I'm a hard gainer. I have a hard time putting on muscle. I have to eat more than I want to eat and it's, you know, it's fucking difficult. So I know how to teach guys how to put on muscle if they're a hard gainer because I've done it. You know, you don't want to talk to fucking, you know, some, some guy who was born with like the most fucking, uh, Chad Arnold Schwarzenegger genetics. Like they don't have a problem putting on muscle, right?

25:46 Don't, don't ask them if you're a hard gainer or what to do because they don't know because they're not a hard gainer. So find people that are in the situation that you are or that were, and then worked their way out of it. And now they have what you want to have. I think that struggle is, is a really good thing. And I think it's a gift. Many, many people who are listening to this right now have some major struggle, whether it's anxiety, not able to approach women, not able to banter correctly.

26:10 Maybe they're struggling with money. You have to change your perspective and see that as a gift. And here's why the further you go down is it's like a slingshot, right? So imagine, imagine you're pulling a slingshot downward and you're aiming it upward, pulling it down, pulling it down. Well, that's an analogy for how low you're going down and how it sucks. And it's going down. It sucks. It sucks. It sucks. Well, that just creates more tension to grow and launch that much more higher up. And that's the way I've seen it for my life.

26:39 Like I had, I had a problem with anxiety and I was in a situation when I lived in Japan where I had to public speak and I would have panic attacks. And for a good year there in my life, I thought I was going to lose my mind to the point where I couldn't even go outside. I mean, let alone talk to a woman, like, forget that. That's, you know, eons away from where I was. I was in a really bad, anxious state. I looked like a skeleton.

27:03 It was the most horrible year of my life. I was 28 years old. And so through meditation and through some of these, you know, personal development techniques and tactics that we teach, I was able to not only come out of that anxiety, but I feel like it added a layer of depth and wisdom and experience into who I am where now when I walk into a room, I'm not just another Joe Schmo off the street that, you know, was born into a trust fund and had everything handed to him and didn't have any struggle.

27:36 No, I feel like women can see it in my eyes that I came from this like super low place. And that's another thing about Tyler, excuse me, Owen of Real Social Dynamics. He was in a, I mean, oh my God, man, he came from the, the bottom, the hard, the, he was the hardest case that you could possibly be. I mean, he was at the bottom of the bottom of the bottom. And now you can just see something in his eyes. There's like a glimmer in his eyes.

28:00 And I really respect him because not only did he come out of that, but he's still growing and still, still trying. And I try to do that myself, but because I've come from such a low place, because I've had so many failures, so much anxiety, I feel like that's my badge of honor. You know what I'm saying? It's like the, the diamond is made with pressure. And if you don't have that pressure, then there can be no diamond. So in a way you're suffering is the greatest gift you'll ever have.

28:28 Because right now you're thinking, how do I get out of this? I need to find a teacher. Oh my God, what am I going to do? But I'm telling you, the fact that you're this low and this much struggling, your future is going to be amazing because you're going to grow into this like beautiful diamond that's able to attract women, you know, just by looking at them in a certain way. You're going to be able to attract money. You're going to be able to get all these things.

28:50 And if you were just given that, you know, from the start of your life, like let's take Brad Pitt, just amazingly good looking. I mean, I know he struggled a little bit, but let's just say he amazingly good looking, became a movie star. Chicks just throw themselves at them. He, he, he doesn't really have that deep set skill set that you and I are going to have because we struggled. So John and I both came from a place where we really struggled with women. I know you did John too.

29:15 I remember your story about, you know, like punching the roof in your car when you're sitting there crying because you couldn't even get yourself to approach one woman. And, you know, I, I would have panic attacks and, and, and I couldn't approach women, but now it's like, we're so deep seated into who we are because we grew past that, that women can sense that. So it's like a diamond or a, um, a rock being cleaned off by water constantly pounding on it. So I, I, I personally look at, at, at adversity as a gift because it's going to make you that much better.

29:50 You can't get anywhere without adversity in my opinion. I mean, you can, you can, you can self-develop, but man, adversity, that's the shit right there. So be thankful for it. And when you do find that teacher, he or she is going to help you get out of it and teach you how to use your adversity to propel yourself into excellence. And then you're going to thank your adversity. Me, uh, my 28th year, which is the worst year of my life was also the best year of my life.

30:14 I was in Japan. Um, you know, it was, it was horrible. Like even when I think about it, like my hands start shaking, but because that happened, I feel like it made me into who I am today. And who I am today is somebody who I'm proud of and who I love. And that's waiting for you guys as well. If you are struggling. Yeah. Yeah. Carl Jung, uh, said that in order for the, the trees, branches to reach to heaven, its roots must go as deep as hell.

30:43 Damn. Let me, let me say one. And Buddha said, no mud, no lotus flower. Hmm. That's yeah. It's, it's the same. It's the same thing. It's like, um, there's this concept in, uh, in Zen Buddhism where they, I think they say that like heaven and hell is like a 10th of an inch apart. And it's because every time you're like at your lowest low, there's the potential for, you know, what's called ego death, which is where you realize that like, holy shit, it's all in my head.

31:13 It's all been created by my head. This is, it's, it's, you know, you have this nihilistic sort of experience where you're, you're free to choose the life you want. Uh, not nihilistic, I guess, but sort of existentialist experience where you, you realize that you give meaning to your own life and, um, you know, you want to be thankful for that. And ideally if you can find a coach that has been there too, that's been to the lowest lows, they'll have no problem coaching you because they know where you're at.

31:39 They know who you are. They've been there themselves, you know? So I think the biggest thing when you're looking for a mentor is to find someone that wasn't handed what they're, what they're, what they've got and what they're trying to teach you. They had to work for it, you know? Yeah. If you go learn from a natural with women, which I've done, I just don't feel like they really have that majority of experience to be able to teach you because to them, it's just obvious. Like, why would you cool, bro?

32:03 Yeah. Why do you mean, bro? Like, why are you trying to learn this? But like somebody who's struggled, who has been where you're at and they've, they've ascended to the point where they can effortlessly attract women. Certainly that's the coach you want to choose because he knows exactly where you're at. He can empathize. He, he's felt that in his own heart. He knows what you're feeling in your heart right now. And you know, I, I know what you're feeling in your heart because I've been there, brother.

32:26 It, it, it's not fun. It hurts. You know, I mean, as human beings, we just want to feel a woman's touch. We just want to have a woman in our bed and just like hold her and smell her and be with her. And when you can't get that, it's almost like you're not getting water or air or food. It's really a biological need. So I feel like if you can't get women, you really need to make that a priority to solve that problem once and for all, get the coaching.

32:53 That's actually going to help you. Either you can hire a coach like me. It's MarkSingCoaching.com. Again, that's M-A-R-K-S-I-N-G coaching.com. Or you can check out our bootcamp, which, which again, is going to launch on Thursday. And you can see that at AlphaEvo.com. Actually, John, I just remember. That's the live link. Yeah, that's the live link. AlphaEvo.com. You can go ahead and grab it right now before it launches. But you know what? Even if, even if it does launch and you're hearing this after it's launched and the, it's already sold out, which it's definitely going to sell out based on the amount of response we've been getting.

33:27 If that happens, shoot us an email because you're listening to this podcast. Just let us know that you did hear this on the podcast and then we might be able to squeeze you in there. But we specifically created that course to, to help a myriad of different problems. And again, both John and I have been there, brother. So, you know, we know exactly what you need to become the girl magnet you deserve to become. Absolutely. And, um, you know, as always, you guys know what products I have, you know, I have seven strategies to develop your masculinity.

33:56 Uh, you know, I've got body and alpha. They're both down below. I think they're great. I let them speak for themselves. You know, you can check them out and see all the information that you want to on those pages. And, uh, yeah, we've got alpha evolution launching, uh, this Thursday at 2 PM Eastern time. But because you're a listener of the podcast, if you want to go to alpha evo.com, we've opened it up for you. Uh, that link, no one knows that link except the people that are listening to the podcast.

34:23 So you can check it out and actually pre-order it and, uh, get your spot before we, we close the doors after it launches on Thursdays. So yeah, guys, check it out. And, uh, yeah. Do you have anything else to add Mark? I really don't. I felt like I blew my load right in the beginning there and somehow I blew six other loads. I was, I was like, Whoa, there's more to say about this. When you're ready, the teacher will come guys. And, um, yeah. So just kind of put yourself out there, set out the intention.

34:54 Um, one thing I suggest is writing down your intentions as I do. And one quick little, uh, homework assignment I can give you is to write at the top of a piece of paper when I have it all my way, dot, dot, dot, and then list out everything you will be. I am attracting women anytime I want to. I am making X many dollars per month. I am X, Y, Z. So just list out all your intentions. And I actually rewrite that every single day because again, while I am a coach, I'm a student first and I'm constant student of self-development.

35:25 I listen to podcasts, I read books, I, all the time, all day long, I'm just, you know, taking in this information and that's the way to grow. Like John said, there's no overnight secret. It's just a constant, constant campaign. It's a constant, constant mission that you have to be on all the time because if you give up and you just let go, then your life is going to get shitty. You got to keep climbing that mountain and keep trying, keep learning. And when you do that, you're going to naturally run into other people who are doing the same thing.

35:54 You're going to find mentors and your life is going to get better and better. And you're not going to have to keep climbing because you're trying to get out of something. You're going to keep climbing because you enjoy it and you're trying to get to something better. That's what's key is it's, it's not always a struggle after a certain point. You know, it's not a struggle to keep going. It's actually fun. It is fun. So yeah, check out the links down below, guys. We'll have links to my website, to our products, to Mark's coaching link, everything you need to know.

36:20 You can pre-order Alpha Evolution and actually get access now if you want to by going to alphaevo.com. And yeah, as always, we will see you guys next time. Thanks for listening, guys. See you next time.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.