How to Deal With Guys Who Are Jerks, Cockblocks, and AMOGs

0:00 Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, gentlemen? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP. Let's go ahead and jump directly into the content. So, you got some guys who are being a dick to you. You got some cock blocks. You got some AMOGs, as we call them, alpha male of the group, and you want to know how to deal with them.

0:35 I'm going to teach you how to do that because in frame control, which basically means controlling the interaction, being in the driver's seat when you're dealing with people, frame control is usually most challenged by dudes. It definitely happens to women, and a woman cannot become attracted to you unless you're controlling the frame. So, if you don't know exactly what frame control is, I'd strongly suggest you listen to any episode I've recorded on it. Just search frame control in my name, and they'll pop up. Very, very important concept.

1:04 But most of the time, these frame checks, which is basically like somebody being an asshole to you, somebody challenging you, somebody saying that you're gay, or why are you talking to us, or making fun of your name, making fun of something you're wearing. The way that you look, the things that you're doing, happens from guys. Guys are challenging you. Now, the reason we do this, obviously, is we're all dudes here. We know why we do it. It's because we're trying to flex up a little bit.

1:28 We're trying to take the power in the interaction, which indeed means controlling the frame. And oftentimes, it's over a girl, right? Like, every time you see a dude fighting another dude, and especially if it's in a nightclub or a bar, what's the reason? Always a girl. Always a girl. You ladies listening out there have been the causes of many, many black eyes and bloody noses and butthurt feelings and challenges. Dudes flexing up on other guys, trying to make them feel bad, trying to diminish their value in the eyes of women.

1:59 And guys will often do this in front of girls in order to do that very thing. So we're going to talk about how to deal with that. Okay, so first of all, you got to be cool to the guy, man. You got to be cool to him. And when he first comes in, he's like, and you're like, oh, my God, we got ourselves an AMOG on our hands. AMOG, again, stands for alpha male of the group. You just got to be chill because the essence of frame control is that you're on your inner balance point and you're unaffected.

2:26 And I cannot stress that enough. You have to be unaffected by this dude. So if you're truly unaffected by somebody, right, how would you behave? Would you be a dick to them? Would you try to fight them? Would you be angry at them? No, you'd actually be cool to them because you're so unbelievably secure in your own definition of your own reality. You're so on your inner balance point that it doesn't even piss you off when this dude comes in and tries to be aggressive towards you.

2:55 And believe me, boys, this happens to me all the damn time, all the damn time. And guys will like put their hands on you. They'll like put their hand on your shoulder. And like they're basically trying to out alpha you and trying to intimidate you. So the way that you show them that you can't be intimidated is to be cool and to be completely fucking unaffected. Now, being cool is a delicate thing for me to tell you all because a lot of you guys can misinterpret and then you kind of become like a kiss ass and you kind of become agreeable and your voice goes up at the end and you're like seeking rapport with this dude.

3:28 No, it's like you're cool in the way that you'd be cool to your little brother. You're cool in the way that you'd be cool to your employee if you were a boss. You're not condescending. You're just cool to him and you're unaffected and you're calmer than he is. Okay, so in an interaction, the person who's reacting more, the person who's putting more energy into the interaction is the one who is not controlling the frame. Why is that? Because they're investing more, which means it's more important to them, which means they're in a state of weakness, which means they're in a state of disadvantage as far as their mentality is concerned.

4:04 So when you don't give a shit, you're cool to the person and you're not putting out nearly as much energy as he is. Okay, so you're talking to a girl, right? Guy comes up. He's like, hey, man, that's my girlfriend. Be like, what's up, brother? What's your name? Okay, you have a lower energy than he does. And when I say lower energy, that doesn't take away from what I spoke about. I think it was last week on Monday. I spoke about how you want to go bring good energy to women.

4:29 What I'm saying is you're not spazzing out the way he is because, guys, you've all seen it. When you're talking to a girl and the boyfriend comes over, homeboy is just so pissed, dude. He's so buttered. And it's like, dude, I don't care when dudes talk to my girl. I go over and I befriend them. I let them know that I'm the alpha. I'm not, like, threatened by it. And that's exactly what he's communicating. And we're going to turn this on him in a second. If he doesn't behave, we're going to fuck his shit up.

4:52 Trust me, bro. Trust me on this one. He's about to get decimated. Why is it that every time I record a podcast, my phone goes off? Hold on, folks. All right. Silence that shit. Sorry about that. Very unprofessional. I do apologize. Okay. So we're going to get him, bro. But at first, we're going to give him the benefit of the doubt. Because as the old saying goes, you catch more bees with honey. Right? Do you catch more bees with honey or shit? Well, I don't know if you've ever taken a dump in the woods.

5:21 So I'm not going to even comment on that. But let's just say, for the sake of example, you catch more bees with honey. So we're cool to the guy. But again, we are way less reactive than he is. And we simply befriend him. Okay. Now, most of the time, and you guys know this, he's not going to want to be befriended. Okay. He's going to challenge you. He's going to be butthurt. He's going to try to call you out on certain things. So, of course, I have my frame control reversals that are really, really important when it comes to attracting women, but also very applicable here.

5:53 Many times, guys will accuse you of being gay, make fun of your outfit, ask you a question as to why you're doing a certain thing, et cetera, et cetera. Okay. So what I really like to use on dudes, I like to use all my frame control reversals, which I'm going to tell you in a minute. But what I really like to use is agree and amplify. I actually had a dude on YouTube. He's like, what do I do if guys make fun of my name? I think his name was Simba or some shit.

6:16 He's like, guys always say I have a girl name. Bro, you have to fucking agree and amplify. Make it a hundred times worse. Be like, yeah, my middle name is actually Sarah. And my last name is Jessica Parker. So absolutely, bro. Like my parents thought I was going to be a girl. We're too lazy to change my name when I came out a boy. So I just run with it. And that is agreeing with it and amplifying it times a hundred. As I always say on this podcast, if a guy calls you gay, you say, yeah, man, I'm so gay.

6:44 I sucked 200 dicks yesterday. My jaw is killing me. Right. Or a guy says to you, like, look at you, bro. You're short. You'd be like, yeah, man, I just got to shrink a couple more feet. And then I can attain my lifelong goal of being a horse jockey. Okay. So you agree with it and you amplify it. So you're cool to the guy. He's not really reciprocating your kindness. He kind of comes at you a little bit. Then we can start throwing the shit in his face.

7:07 Now, the reason we do this again is because most of the time, like I'm talking 95% of the time, dudes are going to be a dick to you because they're threatened by you. And they're trying to out alpha you because they're attracted to the girl who you're speaking to. But this also happens in your friends groups, right? Like friends are going to kind of give you some shit. And if you're affected and you guys have all seen this happen, if you're affected, if you get butt hurt, if you're all like defensive about it, they're going to call you out and be like, bro, don't get your panties in a bunch.

7:37 I'm just fucking with you. Relax. Which is we want to be that guy. We want to be the guy who says, relax, don't get your panties in a bunch. Don't hyperextend your vagina, bro. It's going to be okay. Listen, bro, that man bun that you're flossing, don't hyperextend the man bun, brother. I'm just fucking with you. And that's what we're going to do. If again, you hit him with kindness, he doesn't reciprocate it. And by the way, girls are watching this, okay? And this is why we hit him with kindness because you may be thinking, well, I thought you're the unapologetic man.

8:05 Why are you going to be cool to a guy who's a dick to you? The reason is, is because women hate to say it, boys, and you women listening are going to crack up right now. Women are more socially sophisticated than we are. And they think that boys fighting is fucking juvenile and like prehistoric and like undeveloped. So when they see guys fighting, it just kills their attraction. It just looks so juvenile to them. So what she wants is a dude who's more mature than that to even go there.

8:33 And that's why when he comes in, you're like, what's up, man? What's your name, brother? Women really respond to that because they see that you're taking the higher road and they see that he's taking the lesser road. Women are way more cued in to this kind of dynamic than most of you guys are. So when you win the frame control battle with another dude in front of a woman, she's guaranteed to become attracted to you. I've straight yanked girls off their boyfriends because their boyfriend came in.

8:59 I did all the techniques that I'm telling you guys to do here. And then sure enough, when he's not looking, she's like, hey, could I put my number in your phone? And then like I'm dating her two weeks later and homeboy's gone. And you see guys too who get into fistfights over chicks. And meanwhile, you and me are talking to the two girls who those guys are fighting over 20 feet away and we're yanking their phone number or even taking them home that night because these two douchebags are fighting over them.

9:24 It looks absolutely primitive to a woman. So don't be that dude. Don't let him coerce you or convince you to get into a fight with him other than what I'm going to tell you right here, okay? Such as agree and amplify. And my next one, which would be misinterpret, okay? He says something like, bro, why are you wearing a Hawaiian shirt, dude? You'd be like, look, bro, I know you want to see me with my shirt off right now. I know you're trying to take off my shirt, but relax, brother.

9:48 We just met. A girl hears you do that to another dude, it's over. Like he's gone. He's probably going to walk away with his tail between his legs. Or my third and favorite frame control technique when it comes to dudes and even females is the real question is, or lately I've actually been kind of evolving that one. I like to say the better question is. The better question is. So he's like, hey, man, like, why are you talking to my girlfriend? The real question is why are you so fired up about it, bro?

10:16 Don't be threatened now. It's all right. Okay. And I really like to say this word, guys. Take note of this. This is so fucking effective with AMOGs, jerks, and guys who are trying to cock block you. The single word, five-letter word, relax. Okay. So I always say that to dudes. Relax, bro. I'm just talking to her. That sentence right there is showing her as well as him that he's kind of reacting. That I got into his frame a little bit, that he's kind of coming unpeeled.

10:47 And she sees that. And when I say relax, it shows that I'm the calmer dude. If you tell somebody to relax, you just said to them, yo, I'm calmer than you are. I'm not being affected by the situation, but clearly you are. You're kind of making an ass of yourself, bro. So drop it down a gear. Don't hyperextend your vagina. Relax. Okay. And on that note, I also like to call them out in a certain way if they observe something about me and like ask me a question.

11:15 All right. So I'm talking to some girls and some random guy comes over who happens to know these girls. Then he starts kind of flexing up on me because he can tell that these girls are attracted to me and maybe he's been working on them and he wants them to be attracted to him. So he's a little bit butthurt. So he comes at me and he observes something about me. So he's like, hey, man, what's with those shoes, man? What's with those shoes? I thought those went out of style in 2015.

11:40 So the first thing I say is, first of all, bro, a little creepy that you're paying so close attention to me that you actually notice my shoes. A little creepy, man. I'm going to be honest with you. A little creepy. Are you? Are you attracted to me? You're kind of like staring at me a lot. You kind of notice things about me. But no, man, like I'd have to ask you. I think the better question is, why aren't you wearing these shoes? These things are so comfortable.

12:00 So anyway, ladies, as I was saying, and then I might turn my attention from him and like ignore him completely. And that's another tactic is just ignore the dude. Now, bear in mind, and I've seen this go wrong for guys that you could get fucking smacked right upside the head if you like turn your back to a guy. But I've done it many times. And most of the time dudes know that if they straight punch you, they're losing the girls and you're getting the girls. So you can do these frame control reversals to repeat, agree, and amplify, misinterpret, say the real question is, which is to flip the tables and or completely ignore this jackass.

12:36 And then it's going to work really well for you. Also question why he's so focused on you. And you guys could do this to your friends. Anything your friend says to you when he tries to question you, why are you doing this? Why blah, blah, blah. Well, like whatever it is, just be like, bro, honestly, it's kind of creepy that you're so obsessed with me that you're paying that close attention. Like what's going on there, man? Do you have something to tell me? And what you've done is you've actually flipped it on them and made it about them.

13:02 And this is the quintessential way to deal with jerks and cock blocks and everybody else. All right, now let's talk about how many of you guys are like outshined by the alpha male. Let's say you're at a party, you're doing pretty well, you're trying to be social as I've taught you to be. And then a more boisterous, aggressive, loudspoken, charismatic alpha male comes into the room. If a guy is outdoing you and you need to take that power back, simply make him perform for you. For example, let's say he does like a little dance or something.

13:33 I've literally had this happen. We were at a party. I was doing really good. Then this dude comes in, right? Like the Chad high school football hero who definitely gets more ass than toilet seat. And I was still building my chops. I was still coming up, but I had a pretty good concept of this and I wanted to test it. So he comes in and he's like doing this little dance and it was pretty good and it was pretty funny and everybody's into it. So what I did is I was like, bro, that dance was awesome.

13:59 Do that move again. That one. Yeah. That one where you spin around. Do that again. Do that again. Oh my God. It's awesome guys. Clap for this guy. Clap for this guy. So what I did is I basically made him perform for me. If I make him perform for me, that means I'm the one in the power position. And I know this sounds juvenile. It sounds like, why do I have to play these power games? Because guys, girls are watching and we as men understand this pretty intrinsically.

14:25 Although sometimes our gorilla nature comes in and we start fist fighting, which is not good. But girls understand this and guys understand this. So you need to get that power. Okay. So you make the guy kind of perform for you. If he's outshining you, then what you do is you take the power back by making him shine for you. So to repeat, okay, we have agree and amplify. We have reframing. We have misinterpret. We have ignoring. When a guy questions you, you ask him why he's so obsessed with you.

14:54 Like, bro, why are you paying such close attention to me? It's kind of like the example where a guy says, hey man, why are your shorts so short? You say, bro, the real question is why are you staring at my legs? Okay. It's always about them. You make it all about the other. And then if the guy's outshining you, you make him perform for you and make him do those things. So this is the way to get the power back from jerks, guys who are going to try to flex up on you.

15:19 Again, you have to be unaffected. You cannot get butthurt. Do not raise your voice. You want to be as calm as calm can be. And you can use the magical words, relax, to set him back into place and let the girl see that you are indeed the alpha male. And as I say all this, I want to reiterate, boys, that I've probably diffused, I'd say probably like 40% of dudes just by being cool to them. And I've actually made them my friends. I've actually had a couple good wingmen who have come from them trying to flex up on me and trying to be a dick to me.

15:50 And because I was so cool to them, we became friends. And they actually told me later, they were like, yeah, man, like straight up. I was threatened by you. I was seeing what you were doing. I was kind of jealous. And I'd rather join you than fight you. And I was like, exactly, man. You catch more bees with honey, supposedly. And that's why I really suggest that to begin with. But if the dude continues to be an asshole, pull this shit out. He has no freaking chance.

16:14 And you can also question him. If he's being a dick and you kind of want to flex up on him, be like, hey, man, I like your shirt, bro. It's pretty tight. Trying to show off those muscles, huh? You've been working out, dude. Look at that. Look at that bicep, dude. You've been working out, bro. You should be proud of that. I think next time you should go with the extra small, man. It might show your midriff a little bit, but at least the biceps will pop, dude.

16:34 Good job, man. Hey, bro, relax. I'm just fucking with you, man. Don't get butthurt about it. So anyway, girls, check this out. And like that. Okay, and you continue talking. Dude has no chance. You guys are just going to decimate these douche canoes because they came at you with aggression. So you're going to throw it right back in their face. Look, we're cool as unapologetic men, as I said. The first thing they get is respect. The first thing they get is a handshake. And a, hey, what's up, man?

16:59 But if they keep trying to flex up, dude, there's no hole for them. They're going to get absolutely decimated. And they're going to wonder what the fuck hit them. And it's with these frame control reversals, things like relax, putting out less energy than they are, pointing out how important it is to them that they look a certain way or do a certain thing and or make them perform for you, that you're going to take back your power. Gentlemen, I do appreciate you listening. I drop podcasts on Mondays and Thursdays.

17:25 So stay tuned for the next one. And I will see you in the next episode. So.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.