Your Greatest Weakness is Actually Your SUPERPOWER

0:00 Welcome to The Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, gentlemen? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP. I really do appreciate you. And today, we are diving back into self-development. And this is one that when I heard it for the first time, it completely changed my life. Man, a lot of times we rip on ourselves. We hate those negative things about ourselves. But in this one, I want to put to you, your superpower is actually your greatest weakness.

0:41 And your greatest weakness is, in fact, your superpower. So this shouldn't be a really long one because I just want to get this concept across to you. And this is really going to help with your confidence because once you understand that those things that you probably hate about yourself, when you reframe it and you see that it's probably among your greatest strengths, you're going to look at yourself differently. You're going to reframe the way you perceive yourself, the way you view yourself, and your confidence is going to go up.

1:08 So since I'm the only guy who I can speak about, since I'm the only fella here in this recording studio, I'm going to use myself as an example, and then we're going to talk about you. And we're going to try to unpack and uncover why it is that your biggest weakness is, in fact, your superpower. A lot of you guys know that I have suffered from anxiety my whole life. When I lived in Japan, I suffered panic attacks, agoraphobia, which actually means you can't even go outside your house, and massive, massive, massive social anxiety.

1:39 Well, that anxiety got to a point where it was so bad that I almost lost my mind. I often compare it to a person who's walking on the edge of a cliff. I was literally that close to losing my mind. I remember there was one time specifically where I was, like, cooking up some food, and I felt myself teetering where, I don't know, I can't explain it, but I was going to have a panic attack and lose my mind, and I just was able to keep myself sane.

2:06 Well, it was when I found NLP, and I did so via an internet search, because I tried medications, I tried cognitive behavioral therapy, I tried freaking anything under the sun, nothing worked. So I was like, dude, I'll try this NLP. Even though, honestly, I thought it sounded like complete shit, I was like, dude, I'll try it. I'll try anything, bro. Like, tell me to stick a fucking deldo up my ass and run around like a chicken for three days. I'll do it. I don't fucking care.

2:28 I just want to get rid of this anxiety. And NLP was the thing that saved me. Long story short, it's why I work on it with my clients, because it changes the internal belief systems, metaprograms, and schemas. In my opinion, even the brain chemistry and the neuroplasticity of the brain itself to make you into the dude who you were born as. I was born without anxiety, but anxiety was produced through my life experiences, through my parents, particularly my mom, who was an absolute freaking stress case to this day.

3:00 And because I was predisposed to anxiety, I took it on, and then it went to really negative levels. Well, once I got over my anxiety, I realized that me having anxiety very easily, me stressing out very easily, is actually my superpower. And the reason it's my superpower is because it keeps me so unbelievably motivated. I get shit fucking done. If you look through the history of this podcast, I don't think I've missed one episode. Think about that. 500 episodes over, I think it's been over five years, I've not missed one episode.

3:36 Because I'm kind of a stress case. I'm kind of anal. I'm kind of always on point because I worry, dude. And I'm going to be honest with you guys. I'm being vulnerable with you here. I'm lighting myself on fire and letting you watch me burn. I worry about things very easily, especially when I was younger. I would have sleepless nights. I, as I explained, would have panic attacks. I was a fucking stress monster 1000. And now I've got it massively under control. I worry probably about 10% of what I used to worry.

4:06 But I got the perfect freaking calibration where I'm just stressed out enough to be able to be effective. So what I've done is I've taken my weakness, which is essentially anxiety, panic attacks, agoraphobia, stress, and I've leveraged it to my advantage. Getting shit done, always being on time, always delivering, always doing what I say I'm going to do. And because of that, I'm extremely successful. So my biggest weakness is stress and anxiety, but my biggest superpower is getting shit done. And they are actually one in the same.

4:40 Without my stress and anxiety, I would not be nearly as motivated. I have a friend who's basically a shit on a log. The guy doesn't do shit. He lives in a hovel. He has a shitty job. All he does is play video games and smoke weed. Now that's cool for him and I'm not judging him. But when I look at the dude, I'm like, how in the fuck can you live like that? He looks at me and he's like, why are you so motivated? Why are you so driven?

5:02 Why are you constantly going for the next goal? And I'm like, man, it's just the way I'm wired. And when I didn't have control of that wiring, it spiraled out of control into my biggest weakness. But now that I've taken care of my biggest weakness, yes, with NLP, which by the way, I offer all my clients when they come into my program. Now that I've taken care of that biggest weakness, I have control over it and I can leverage it. So oftentimes when I'm stressing out, I say, whoa, step back.

5:29 Okay, first of all, stress is being here and wanting to be there or worrying about the future rather than taking care of the present. So I immediately get perception over what the issue is. Then I say, okay, I'm feeling the stress. I'm feeling some anxiety here. Let's leverage this shit. Let's record a podcast as I'm doing right now. It was not difficult for me to sit down and do this podcast because I've made a commitment to you that I'm going to do them twice a week.

5:57 And there's literally hundreds of thousands of dudes who are depending on me to do it. That gives me enough stress to motivate me to get the shit done. How do you think I feel about my clients? These guys pay me money. I freaking show up every day, every way. I put blood, sweat, and tears into my dudes because I guarantee them I'm going to 10X your results with women. That's putting stress on my shoulders, man. Like I go to bed at night and I'm like, how's Michael doing?

6:21 How's Brian doing? How's TJ doing? Is Dennis okay? How's Sam doing? I think about my guys constantly because I'm kind of naturally a stress case. But that also has a superpower aspect of it because I feel I'm the best goddamn coach that has ever walked this earth when it comes to teaching dating. I really do. So what is your weakness, brother? What do you hate about yourself more than anything else? And how is it that that's actually your superpower? How is it that it maybe keeps you not stressed out?

6:51 Or like me, the stress keeps you motivated. Or you're super fucking driven because maybe you have an ego that wants to prove to other people that you're successful. So you've become successful. Or maybe you're super into self-development as a lot of guys are who listen to my podcast. Why are you into self-development? Oftentimes because you suffered a lot. Because you too have a predisposition to anxiety or perhaps a predisposition to depression. Perhaps you're not good with women. So you're going to train to become the best pickup artist that's ever lived.

7:24 The best pickup artist I've ever met in my life is literally on the spectrum. He has Asperger's. He's not physically attractive at all. He's kind of fat. He's balding. He's a ginger. Not that I think being ginger is ugly. I actually think gingers are pretty cool. Especially female gingers. Goddamn fucking sexy. I'm super into them. But he grew up thinking he was ugly. The best pickup artist that ever lived. Me too. I couldn't look at a girl let alone go talk to one because of my anxiety.

7:53 And because I had so much anxiety around it, it created a negative circumstance in my life. That being, I couldn't pair the bond with a woman. Pair bonding with a woman is literally essential for your health. And I really want you guys to consider that. You need the feminine in your life in order to be happy. If you don't have it, you are destined to be miserable. Which is why I feel that getting this part of your life settled once and for all is among the most important things you could ever do.

8:18 And that's why I'm a dating coach. So, in my case, and probably your case too, we have a weakness of trying to attract women. We have a weakness of being able to control the frame. We have a weakness of not being able to banter. We perhaps have a weakness, quote unquote, of being an introvert. How is you being an introvert actually a superpower? What is it through you being an introvert that makes you really good at things? Perhaps you can think very logically. Perhaps you're a great problem solver.

8:47 Perhaps you're able to think of solutions that people wouldn't think of. And perhaps you're successful because you've put yourself in a niche where you being introverted is actually making you more money. How can we leverage that to display it to women? Tell you what, gentlemen, you don't have to be a seemingly extrovert as I am. And to be honest with you, I'm actually an introvert in order to get good with women. We can leverage your introversion in order to get massive success with women. And that's all done through frame control.

9:15 And I teach my introverted clients how to do that when they come into my program. But again, let's look at yourself. What are some things about yourself that you feel are a big weakness? Can you reframe that and see that it's actually a strength? What is it that comes out of that that actually makes you strong? I put this question to my woman, Marissa. Marissa, and she told me I could talk about this, has a little bit of ADHD. But here's the weird thing about her.

9:41 She is able to hyper-fucking-focus and look at patterns and figure out how to unravel issues at her job. So she's at a very high position at her job. And she's an expert at seeing the patterns in things and unraveling them. And that comes because she doesn't have good attention on boring things. Oftentimes when I'm talking to her and I'm actually the same way, she's like, come on, come on, come on. Tell me what the info is. Get it out. Get it out. Because she kind of has that seemingly ADHD.

10:10 But what it really means is she can hyper-concentrate on certain aspects that are complicated. So growing up, she was told, oh, you're not good at school. You can't concentrate. But the truth was she could concentrate. They just weren't giving her enough complexity to meet her complex mind. So every time I talk to her, she's always very cognizant of, like, words that I say that are incorrect. And it's really good training for this podcast because if I say something, I'll be talking. And I'll be like, yeah, the other day I was talking to this person.

10:41 And I said, dude, you're so ducking, stupid. And she's like, ducking? And she just focuses on it. And I'm like, you know what I meant, fucking. Anyway, and I keep talking. So that gives me good training for this podcast. I want to turn it back to you. You've been thinking a little bit about your biggest weakness. If you can't find how your superpower relates to that, I want to ask you a different question. What are you really good at? What is your superpower that perhaps isn't related to what you feel is your biggest weakness?

11:10 Your biggest weakness might be you get angry easily. And you feel that separate from that, your biggest superpower is you're really good with people. You're really persuasive. When you think about it, those two are actually interconnected. And one creates the other. The reason why you get angry easily is because you're impatient, you're dissatisfied, you want more. Being persuasive is a towards mentality, a towards attribute of somebody who's ambitious. So because you're dissatisfied, you have learned how to be socially persuasive to get yourself to the next level.

11:45 So again, we turn it back to you. Have you figured out how to leverage that greatest weakness to get the positives out of it rather than let the negatives of it drag you down, such as me with my anxiety? That was dragging me down to the point where I was having panic attacks until I overcame the depth of it. And now I just use the surface of it to leverage me into making myself into a better man, me into improving in every aspect of my life.

12:18 This business, my fitness, my financial goals, me as a father, me as a partner to my woman. These are all things that I leverage through the quote-unquote weakness. And I want to encourage you to do the same thing. So boys, getting good with women, getting success in life, getting anything you want comes first with you fixing what's inside your head. And I say it all the time, and I'm going to always say it because it's true. And that also comes by addressing those things that you consider are weaknesses and reframing them into what they really are, which is your superpower.

12:52 God, source, energy, the universe has a very clever way to disguise things. And that's what I love about this life is that we're always unraveling truths that it's like, holy shit, this was hiding right in front of me in the form of my weakness. What the hell is up with that? Then you see it for what it really is. Awareness alone is curative, which means when you see it for what it really is, which is your superpower, your awareness will turn it into your superpower so that you can leverage it from today forward.

13:23 So this is about you, brother. I want you to think about what is my biggest weakness and what is my biggest superpower? And maybe you have some middling superpowers in there as well, such as if you were to call yourself really lazy. Well, maybe you're a great friend in the way that all your boys can come over and have a barbecue and they just love being in your presence because you're not lazy. You're chill. You have a chill vibe about you. And that's what I like about my boy who smokes all the weed.

13:49 Here I am over here like trying to achieve, being super ambitious, super passionate, trying to help my boys. Sometimes you just want to go chill without him because he's chill. We grill hamburgers. We chill out, maybe even play some video games, watch some TV. And I could just get absorbed into his frame of mellowness that a person who's insecure would say, oh, I'm lazy. No, you're not lazy. You're chill, man. You're that kind of dude who's here to chill out motherfuckers like me, who somebody put a battery in my back and I'm just like going like the Energizer bunny, dude.

14:18 I'm just like, just going, going. And that's good, but it can go too far and get me into my anxiety, get me into my stress. So it's all about balance and it's all about leveraging that quote unquote weakness that is actually your superpower. Gentlemen, I hope you've gotten a lot out of this episode. I really enjoyed it. I've had it written down for a couple months and I was like, I want to drop it at the perfect time. And I just felt intuitively that some of you guys had to hear it.

14:46 I know for me, sometimes I get a little out of pocket, dude, and I'll wake up in the middle of the night thinking about business ideas and thinking about clients and thinking about how can I do this and that. I'm just like so fucking inspired that it leads into my weakness, which is stress. I have to regulate it, go hang out with Adam, play some video games, eat some hamburgers and chill the fuck out. You are your own project and it's often like riding a bike.

15:09 Are you ever completely imbalanced when you're riding a bike? No, you're constantly adjusting. You go a little left, you adjust to the right. You go a little right, you adjust to the left. That's what we constantly have to do and that's what's your responsibility to do with your weaknesses and with your superpower. You have to manage yourself. You are your most important project. So find what they are, leverage them, thank them, be appreciative for them, and get to the next level, bro. Because I know that's where you want to go, just like I do.

15:39 Because we're both a couple of spazes. So gentlemen, I do appreciate you listening. I drop podcasts on Mondays and Thursdays. So please make sure to stay tuned for the next one. And I will see you in the next episode. Bye.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.