10 Essentials You Must Do to Yank More Girls Off The Dating Apps

0:00 Welcome to The Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, you goddamn champions? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP. I really do appreciate you. And today, I'm going to give you 10 tips to yank girls off the dating apps. All right, the dating apps, a lot of you guys struggle with them. I hear complaints about them all the time. I know, I know they're David Hasselhoff.

0:31 But when you're in this game, what do I always say? From quantity comes quality. That means you need lots of girls going into the top of your pipeline. You sift out the sea donkeys, canyon mules, and mountain trolls to get the good ones. From quantity comes quality. And what's a good way to have a hook in the water? It's an easy way. It's called the dating apps. I know they suck. I understand a lot of you guys struggle with them, but here's going to be some tips that are really going to help you with this.

0:55 I'm just going to jump straight into the content. I talk a lot about my coaching program. I'm sure you guys don't want to hear it on every goddamn episode. I know it pisses me off when people do that to me. So we're just going to jump into it. The first one, boys, you have to get professional pictures taken. God to the damn it, bro-tendo. A lot of you guys look like goddamn mountain trolls. You look like homeless people on the dating apps and you're wondering why this picture taken in 1998, that's all fuzzy and she can hardly see what you look like, gets no likes.

1:24 Hire a professional photographer. I cannot stress this enough. Go onto Craigslist, go onto Facebook Marketplace, even go onto professional modeling websites in your city and look for a photographer. You can either look for an ad or put out an ad, spend a couple hundred bucks, you cheap son of a bitch, and go get some professional pictures taken. I'm talking 500 of them. Tell that MF or be like, yo, I want that thing going off all the time. I know I'm going to look like a canyon mule in 95% of them, but there's going to be about five, boys, about five, where you will look like Xerxes himself.

1:58 Why did I say Xerxes? Xerxes is a complete punk ass. You're going to look like Achilles, okay? You're going to be so beautiful, your hair flapping in the breeze, your eyebrows are going to be arched perfectly, there's going to be a glimmer in your eye, and your teeth are going to be shining like the sun on the Sahara Desert itself. And those are the pictures that we need to put on the dating apps. Don't ever, without provocation, have one bad picture on the dating apps. I would rather have four good pictures than eight semi-good pictures.

2:27 More pictures does not mean more success. The ideal amount of pictures is five, five pictures. Here's a good tip for your profile picture, the main one. Have the photographer take a picture of you while you're looking into a sunset. So the sunset is across from you, she stands across from you, you're looking at it, it's going to light up your pupils and make the color of your eyes really pop and look directly into the camera, smiling, your head, your face, your mullet, flossing directly on that picture so that she has no question as to who you are.

3:01 You don't want to be with your friends. You don't want to be with other girls. Not in that main profile picture. It just wants to be you. And the sunset picture is really, really powerful. All right, that's two tips down, boys. Professional pics and the sunset pic. The next one is a picture with an animal. I want you to have a puppy, a frog, a bird, a duck, a freaking stingray that you're holding, a sloth, which I actually had. I went to Honduras and I was holding a sloth, bro.

3:25 I couldn't even believe it. I was actually holding the sloth. And actually, my girlfriend Marissa was holding the sloth. The motherfucker tried to bite her shoulder. He's all like really slowly. He's like, ah, like about to bite her shoulder. I'm like, yo, yo, yo. And I like slapped my hand on his forehead. And I was like, no, you little fucker. Don't bite my girlfriend. Those fuckers are mean, man. Got to be careful for the sloth. But if you have a picture of an animal, that's really good.

3:47 And if you're ripped, having a picture of you with your shirt off is really good as well. Not try hard, not trying to show that you're ripped, but doing an activity like throwing a Frisbee on the beach. I've talked about this many times in my podcast before, but make note of that. If you have a decent body, we want to show it off. We also, and this is tip number five, want to show off high value boys, high value. I cannot express this enough. Here's something a lot of you guys may be overlooking.

4:13 A girl cannot become attracted to you unless she knows that you have a higher social value than she does. What does that mean? Okay. So her hotness gives her a certain social value in the pecking order. We as humans are a lot like chickens. Okay. We know where we rank in the pecking order. If she's really, really sexy, that's all she needs. Does she need a great personality? Not really. Does she need a great job? No. Does she have to have a 401k and a college education?

4:41 We don't give a shit. Does she have nice tits, nice ass, a thigh gap that you could park a Volkswagen bug in? Is her face so hot it gives you a boner when you just look at it? Yes, yes, and yes. That chick is high on the social value list. Well, here's the thing. She has to perceptively see you above her on that social value list in order to get attracted to you. What does this mean? Immediately, you guys are like, oh, great. I have to have money.

5:02 No, it's social standing, which can be communicated through your pictures by having scarce resources. Okay. Not money, but being in social scenes where you get access to resources that most people don't get access to. Quick example is you hanging out with famous people, you hanging out with really hot girls, you sitting off the side of a helicopter, you walking out of a private jet, you being with a Lamborghini. Again, I know you guys are like, oh, there's the money again. I'm fucked. It's not like that.

5:36 It's showing that you have a lifestyle that other people envy. Even if you go hike to the top of some mountain, which takes no money at all, and you take a beautiful picture of you in the view, or it's a well-known mountain that a lot of people can't get up, or a place where people can't get into, that's showing scarce resources. When you show scarce resources, it shows that you're high value. One of the most powerful things you can do, in addition to hiring a photographer, is hiring models.

6:04 Boys, I cannot express this enough. Now, this is more powerful on IG and other social media avenues, but you can also post these pictures on the dating apps where you're just at dinner with a lot of attractive people. Okay, what's the big deal? You're not dating any of them, are you? You don't have your hand around her. You're not kissing her. It's very clear that you guys are just friends, but oh, there's beautiful people with this guy. He's in locations that are hard to get to.

6:32 He does things that most people can't do. He knows people that most people don't know. So he's higher up in the echelon of social value, and yes, even above her if she's highly attractive. If you just have normal pictures of you and your friends at a party, and your friends, I hate to say, are kind of blown out, and you're just doing normal everyday guy stuff, and your pictures aren't that good, what are the results you're going to get? Now, I know a lot of you guys don't want to play this game, but I want to tell you this.

6:57 Cold approach, which is speaking to women on the street, will and can communicate high value. Why? Because the way you talk. I will communicate high value all day long and twice on Sunday if I could just talk to a girl because my voice is dialed in. I'm confident. I'm not intimidated by her. Her hotness affects me in no way whatsoever, which sub-communicates high value. It sub-communicates that I'm used to talking to hot girls, so her hotness can't affect me the way it affects every single dude who she talks to.

7:28 So there's different ways to communicate those scarce resources, high value, but what I really want you to understand is you have to be higher value than she is, or she won't get attracted to you. It's plain and simple. Now, frame control is the most important thing, but why? Because frame control communicates high value. You challenge me, I'm going to throw it back in your face. She's like, why are you wearing that? I'm like, the real question is, why aren't you wearing this? This is the shit right here.

7:52 What, are you gay or something? Yeah, I'm so gay. I sucked 2,000 dicks yesterday. My jaw is killing me. You reframe it in a way where you're sure you don't give a shit what she thinks, and therefore you're higher value than she is. But when it comes to the dating apps, you guys have to somehow communicate that you have access to scarce resources, you're high value, you're in the know, you have attractive friends, you have an attractive lifestyle if you really want to get those hot girls off the dating apps.

8:15 All right, my next tip is to use the openers that I gave you in my previous episode. Those six or so openers that I give on that episode are really good, so I would be behest if you were not to go over there and listen to it. Is that even a phrase? I would be behest? I would be very butthurt about it. It would feel like blood is swishing in and out of my heart if you didn't do me the kindness and go listen to that because it is really powerful.

8:40 Use those openers, boys. Separate yourself from the rest of the sea donkeys who are texting her, hey, what's up? What are you up to this weekend? Can you come over tonight? Don't do that shit. Use my openers. The next one is to move it over to texting as soon as possible. So let's say you DM a chick on Tinder. Okay, you guys are going back and forth a little bit. The templates I give you in my program are sticking. She's really into it. You're feeling good.

9:04 You're getting a boner the size of the Statue of Liberty and you're getting fired up because this chick's super hot. What you want to do as soon as possible is say, hey, I don't really like texting on this app. It's pretty inconvenient for me. How would you feel about moving this over to texting? How would you feel about moving this over to texting? The reason we do that is because we want her in a series of micro yeses, saying the little yeses that are going to build up to the bigger yeses.

9:31 Getting a girl over to texting shouldn't be that big of an ask. So she's like, no, I'm more comfortable being on the dating app. You could be like, see you later. Okay, this chick's not serious. If she's not willing to give you her phone number, she's not going to hang out with you. So not only does it give her a micro yes, but it also shows you how serious she is, how likely it is that she's actually going to go on a date with you. All right.

9:50 Once you move it over to texting, then you want to text with her a little bit and say, hey, listen, we met on Tinder and like me, and by the way, that's an NLP embedded command, like me. I love to say that all the time. So what I say is, so hey, I'm sure you've had many bad experiences off Tinder and like me, you don't want to waste your time. So how would you feel about getting on a quick FaceTime call to see if we jive, to see if there's good chemistry?

10:13 How would you feel about that? Now, again, if she's like, no, no, no, she could be a catfish. She could be fake. I want the girl to look good. And I want to check to see if she looks good first on FaceTime, Zoom, wherever it is that you guys want to meet. Okay. So you guys meet on that call. You assess whether or not a of all, she's hot enough for you because you know how it is. Oftentimes it's like 20 pounds later and she looks completely different.

10:38 And you're like, what the fuck? She looked like an angel on the dating app. Now she looks like a face transplant recipient from a mountain troll. What the literal fuck happened, bro, Tendo? And you're all pissed off. So you get her on a FaceTime call. You jive with her. You tell stories. You do all the things that I've taught you to do. And the cool thing is, is that you're in the comfort of your own home. You can get your hair done. You can wear a nice shirt and you can have notes right there in front of you.

11:02 Okay. I'm going to talk about these things. I'm going to get her on a high note and I'm going to cut it off. I'm going to be like, Hey, listen, I got to dip out of here. It was great to talk to you. What are you up to this weekend? What's your week looking like? Okay. And that's my next tip is when you go for the date, don't be like, Hey, are you free on Friday? Or I'd love to take you to some Greek food on Saturday.

11:20 Don't recommend the day. Ask her what her week is looking like. Then if she says she has an open day, Thursday, Friday, Saturday. So perfect. I have that day open too. So again, instead of saying, Hey, how about Friday? You say, what's your week looking like? She says, I have these days free. And you say, Oh, I happen to have those days free too. This will significantly lower the chances of rejection. And you having to be on the back foot where you're like, well, you can't go on Friday.

11:50 So what about Saturday? No, not that day either. What about Tuesday? You don't want to be that dude. So you want to say, what's your week looking like? She gives you the free days and then you jump on the one that she has available. All right. Another tip I have for you boys is many guys ask me, well, how many texts usually does it take to finally land a date off the dating apps? Look, it could be three. It could be 30. But if I was to tell you the average, it's usually about seven to 12 before you can get a date.

12:19 Okay. So the dating apps, yeah, you can use texting and DMS to generate attraction, but really it's the kind of connect with her and set up a date where you can get to know her better. But what I suggest, which is different than some other dating coaches is first of all, get her over texting. And if she's willing to banter a little bit over texting, do it, man. You could get some serious, serious attraction over texting. I did an awesome episode a year ago. I remember it was July because I remember recording it when I was at Trestle bike park, a mountain biking park.

12:48 And the thing is gangster about how to text. So just type my name in the search bar, mark, sing, texting, and listen to that. I have gotten girls so ridiculously attracted to me over texting. So when I hear other dating coaches be like, no, man, texting is only for setting up dates. I strongly disagree with that. I've gotten myself laid from texting alone. So do not make the mistake of thinking that texting isn't a great avenue to get girls super attracted to you because it most certainly is, man.

13:15 I have killed it off texting. It's a great way to elicit attraction. And you could do many of the gambits that I share with you guys on this podcast in order to get girls more attracted to you. Yeah. Over texting. You could easily do that. And I've done it many times. All right. When it comes to the date, I highly suggest you guys keep it fast, like an hour or two at the most. So many times after I've gotten off the call with them and the minimum that I'll do boys is a, is a FaceTime call.

13:41 I need to see this chick. So think about yourself as a dude who's dating for girls. If you were dating for girls, would you just be willy nilly about it and just be like, Oh, I'll just meet whoever wants to meet with me. No, you're going to screen them because you're the prize. That's the way I want you to think, man. I want you to think I'm the prize. I'm the hot chick. She's the one submitting the application. So, Hey, let's get on a FaceTime call because I need to see what you're like.

14:06 And if you're not willing to do that, are you actually going to go on a date with me? Of course not. She's not going to show up to a date if she's not willing to do a FaceTime call. So I love doing the FaceTime call. It screens her. And then when I do the date, depending on the vibe I get from her, I usually keep it pretty short. An hour, two at the most. Hey, what's up? Nice to meet you. And then dip out. Again, that shows high value.

14:24 And if I'm going to give yet another bonus tip, I only spend about 10 to 20 bucks. Okay. A lot of you guys are like, bro, I live in New York city. There's no way I could get away from 20 bucks. Relax, bro. Okay. Don't hyperextend your anal chakra. I understand. But for most of us find a tapas place, find a happy hour place, find a cheap place where maybe you just get drinks and it's just a little get to know you. Okay. We're hanging out, get to know each other.

14:53 I obviously have first date protocols that are super effective. Not enough time to tell you about them here. Again, I think I did a podcast on it where you could probably search my name and first date. I may have a podcast about that where you do multiple things. So she feels like she's spending more time with you than she actually is, but you don't want to waste your time. And that's what we do off the dating apps. So we get into those micro yeses. We get her to do the FaceTime call and we get on a date with her.

15:20 But how do we arrive there in the first place? Pictures, boys. I cannot express this enough, how powerful it is to have professional pictures taken. This is part of my required to do list. When you come and work with me, we are getting you new pictures. We are getting a professional photographer to take them. My three hottest girlfriends go through your pics. You are using my goddamn templates. We are dialing in your shit. So you get much better results. And all my clients do because we're smart.

15:47 We're playing chestnut checkers. So up your game, improve your shit, launch a fusillade of championhood off your battleship and let these chicks know that you brother are the prize. She's not the prize. You're the prize. And always ask yourself, what would I do if I were dating four girls? Okay. Would I just meet with her and be like all bummed out when she's 20 pounds heavier than her pictures and then do the date anyway and spend like 120 bucks? Fuck to the no. Okay. If a girl shows up 20 pounds heavier than she was in her pictures, I straight tell her.

16:19 I'm like, hey, listen, you're not being truthful with your pictures. I find that extremely disrespectful. And I think you should change your pictures so this doesn't happen to the next guy because I always have the next guy's back. I have your backs. We're the unapologetic man army and every single dude out there is part of our regiment and we need to protect each other. So boys, that's 10 tips to yank more girls off the dating apps. I think I gave you more like 12. I always over deliver.

16:43 If you enjoyed this episode, I cannot stress enough that you should go listen to my previous episode about opening lines on the dating apps and then go search those other episodes that I listed. I get emails all the time of dudes like, I watched every single episode of your podcast and I'm like, damn, man, you must be sick of my voice. But I super appreciate it, boys. It means the world to me that you guys continue coming back. My download numbers are skyrocketing. Everything is building and it's because of you.

17:09 And genuinely, man, I sincerely appreciate it. One last thing. Those of you who have left reviews lately, who've emailed me, who have just given me love. Thank you, man. Seriously, from the bottom of my heart, I really appreciate it. That makes this worth it. Where guys say, dude, you've changed my life. I'm so much more confident now. I can't believe how much better I feel since listening to your podcast. That shit is what I love to hear. So any love you have for me, man, I read them sometimes two, three, four or five times.

17:37 That's what makes me feel great. And that's what gives me purpose to continue doing the UMP. I do appreciate you listening, gentlemen. I drop podcasts on Mondays and Thursdays. So please stay tuned for the next one. And I will see you in the next episode. We'll see you next time.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.