5 Eye Contact Secrets That Attract Women

0:00 Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, guys? Thank you for joining me on another episode of the UNP. I really do appreciate it. And today, we are going to talk about eye contact, how to maintain the correct amount of eye contact to get a woman attracted to you, some interesting studies about eye contact, ways to maintain eye contact like a champion without getting nervous, and how to use eye contact to get women ridiculously turned on, this really cool technique I'm going to show you.

0:47 Actually, I have a couple techniques I'm going to talk about. Why? Because we deliver the content in this podcast. So, before we deliver the content, just want to do a little plug. You got to let the guy plug a little bit, let him flex up. After all, he does put a lot of work into this, and I've been getting a ton of champion clients just like you off of this podcast because I am an NLP dating coach. What is NLP, you ask? It's neuro-linguistic programming. What I basically do is go into that brain, reprogram your computer inside your head so you can operate effectively with women, and then I get you going so you can talk to girls like a complete champion, get them attracted to you, and get them into your bed.

1:26 I mean, come on, that's why we're doing this, right? So, if you're interested in that, check me out, dude. CoachMarkSingh.com. Once again, that's CoachMarkSingh.com. You can also click the link below. Do you have any questions as well? Just check out the description below. You can email me if you'd like. I would also appreciate it if you followed me on Instagram. That link is also below, but it's CoachMarkSingh on Instagram. All right, let's jump into the content. All right, so eye contact is super important.

1:52 I want to kick off this podcast with a little experience that I had while I was living in Japan. When I was in Japan, I was a tall white man, and I still am, coincidentally. And I was hired to do, like, wedding shows. So, they would put me in a tuxedo, and then I would just stand up there on stage, like, in this wedding show. It was really weird. And I would have to stand there staring into the eyes of the quote-unquote bride. So, they would get this really hot Japanese girl, put her in a wedding dress, and we'd just sit there staring at each other's eyes.

2:23 And, bro, I got so many dates out of that little gig. It was ridiculous. Never said two words to the girl. I mean, okay, two words, possibly. But, like, hardly talked to her. We just sat there staring at each other's eyes because that's what they had to do to take pictures of us. And the people would walk by and be like, Right? Which means, isn't that beautiful? So, I'd stand there, get paid, and get laid off of it, too. So, eye contact is super, super, super powerful when you do it correctly.

2:58 All right. So, why does eye contact work? Well, a recent study has shown that when you look in this person's eyes and you guys maintain eye contact, there's almost like a melding of the self with the other. So, it's kind of like you become one as far as, I guess, cognitively somehow. You guys stare at each other's eyes and you feel like you're, like, pairing. You're, like, pair bonding with them. And after you've had eye contact with somebody, you actually like that person more because you feel like they're like you.

3:29 So, when you've maintained eye contact with a woman, there's an immediate rapport that's being built. Now, a quick tip about this is, if you're walking down the street in a supermarket anywhere and a girl looks at you in the eyes, bro, maintain eye contact until she's the one that looks away. Now, they say when she looks down, she's being submissive and she's interested. But if she looks, like, to the left or to the right, then she's not interested. I mean, I've kind of found that to be true.

3:55 But what I basically do is I'll just, like, hold the eye contact and make her be the one that looks away first. Now, another thing I do is in that kind of situation, right? Like, let's say I'm getting some lemons and she's over there at the apples and we make eye contact. What I might do is I keep staring at her and then when she looks at me again, give her a little smile and see if she smiles back. And based on her reaction, whether or not I deem she's attracted to me, I might go over there and open her.

4:22 Actually, with me, I'd probably open her anyway. So, that's another thing you can do, too, at a bar is you can be looking at a girl. She'll look at you and then she'll look away. Now, based on her reaction, you deem how much you feel she's attracted to you. And then you keep looking at her and then smile when she looks at you and see how she reacts. Like, if she smiles and then, like, tucks her hair over her ear, does some kind of, like, facial primping, maybe fixes her hair, like, stands up straighter.

4:49 Or even, and this is really subtle, when a girl first looks at me, I look for this subtle kind of blip in her eyes. And what I mean by that is when you're attracted to somebody, you find something attractive, your pupils dilate. They go open just a little bit. And oftentimes, I'll look for that. So, I'll see, like, a cute girl coming towards me, okay? And I'll look, I'll be looking at her first. I always try to look at her, maintain it, maintain it. She looks up, blah, she sees me.

5:14 If I see that little whoop in her eyes, like, literally, your eyes open up. Not just your pupils, but I think your physical eye opens up a little bit more, too. That means she's attracted. Boom, you need to go open her. Okay, there was another study where two people were sitting across the table from one another, and one person was instructed to count the blinks in the other person's eyes. Now, this was a trick to make that person maintain awesome eye contact. And what they found is when they were instructed to count the blinks of a person's eye, that person liked them more.

5:48 So, when you maintain eye contact, it shows confidence, it shows a rapport, right? Because we only maintain eye contact with people who we like and who we trust. It's an intimacy thing. So, in your daily life, we're going to talk about how to maintain the perfect eye contact, and I have a really good trick where you can maintain eye contact literally for as long as you want to. So, we're going to get into that in a second. Here's an interesting fact that I saw while I was doing research on this is, you know how, like, okay, so the very center of your eye is that black thing, the pupil.

6:21 And then the outside of it is the color ring called the iris. Well, the outside of that, there's also a little ring on the very edges of your iris called the limbo rings. Well, apparently, when you're younger and healthier, you have slightly darker limbo rings, or they're more visible to the other person's eyes. So, apparently, they postulate that when we look in somebody's eyes and we see a very definite limbo ring, and you can go look in the mirror after the podcast now, bro. Don't be cutting out on this podcast.

6:52 But next time you look in the mirror, try to see what your limbo rings look like. I just checked myself, and I'm a 43-year-old grandpa. I'm an elder. No limbo rings, bro. They're gone. I don't know where they went. It looks like, for me, it's just one gigantic iris. But apparently, I guess younger people have these limbo rings. I'll have to look. Actually, I'm just thinking about this. I'll have to look in my daughter's eyes and see if she's got them. So, apparently, when they're visible, it shows that you're healthier, and that's more attractive.

7:20 Also, part of the reason to get in shape, like if you're kind of chubby, I know I always tout getting in shape. Everybody relax. I'm just so into it, bro. But the reason why you should be in shape is because how fit you are also dictates how attracted women are going to get to you. Now, once again, game is the most important thing. Body is like only a small percentage of importance, but it does help, and also your immune system. So, when we look at a woman, part of our attraction for her is how strong her immune system is, how clean she is as far as like diet and how in good shape she is.

7:52 That's why fat girls are disgusting. And also, how able she is to have a healthy baby. That's basically all our attraction is based on physically, right? We look at her, and what we're looking for is health signs. Beautiful hair, nice perky tits, nice tad ass, thigh gap, very little fat, nice skin, nice teeth, nice clear eyes, and maybe even that limbo ring. And also, the proportions of her face dictate, you know, how healthy she is to have a baby. Isn't that weird? It's like all dependent on having a baby.

8:23 Most of us definitely don't want to have a baby, although I do suggest that once you get the player out of your system. So, what I'd advise, like if I were talking to my 20-year-old self, I'd be like, look, do exactly what you did, man. Like, go crazy, 20s, 30s, and then settle down when you're about 40, have a kid. Because, bro, like having a kid is super rewarding, but being a player was damn fun, and I really suggest it for everybody. Plus, then you get the skills to attract a quality woman, right?

8:52 So, it's totally worth doing it. All right, let's jump back into eye contact. All right, so they did another study, and they found that most people prefer about three seconds at a time of eye contact. So, like hold it for three seconds, then maybe like look away as you're talking, hold it again for three seconds, then maybe look away. But we've all talked to that guy where like his eyes are darting all over the place, can't maintain eye contact, or even like while we're talking to them, they're looking off in the distance.

9:21 And it feels like they're being aloof, and it doesn't feel like we're really connecting with them. Now, using that aloof listener, as I call it, which means looking off into the distance when she's talking, is powerful. But I base it on reward and punishment. So, when she's talking about something that I deem as building attraction, I deem as her getting more attracted to me, or I deem as conducive to her and I building a bond, I'm going to look at her in the eyes. If she starts complaining, being negative, talking shit, just being like basically bitchy, then I'm going to look away and I'm going to look like over her shoulder.

10:00 I oftentimes pretend like I'm preoccupied by watching like somebody else dance, or I might even, and this is gangster, is like when I'm talking to girls in the bars, other girls are always watching. And you'll be fascinated by this when you get really good game, and you're talking to women in the bars, it's fascinating because you're going to see other girls just like totally like looking at you. So, dude, you can like do a double eye contact, right? You're looking at girl A who you're talking to in the eyes, and then you see girl B like over her shoulder looking at you, then blow, you like switch your eye contact to her, and then you just stare her down until she looks away.

10:32 And then you stare back over at girl A. Gangster level PUA stuff, dude. That's really powerful. Man, my voice is jacked today, dude. I had a bunch of coaching calls and really, really had some good progress with my coaching clients. But man, I really go hard in the paint on the coaching calls. And then by the time night rolls around and I'm doing these podcasts, sometimes my voice is a little jacked. So I apologize for that if I sound like a 55-year-old drunk woman who drinks vodka and smokes cigarettes.

10:59 Hey, give me another vodka. Give me another rum from the bar. That's kind of what I feel like I sound like. All right, here is my awesome strategy to hold eye contact literally as long as you want to. Okay, what you want to do is you want to look in between the person's eyes. So right there on the bridge of the nose, you can just stare at that patch of skin. And I've tested this both with girls, clients, and friends, and you literally cannot tell that they're not looking in your eyes.

11:27 So what you can do if you're nervous is just look at that patch on people's eyes just right there in between. It doesn't make you nervous if you are nervous. And then remember, about three, I think a little more than three seconds personally is good, like three to five seconds. Then you might want to look away and then look back three to five seconds. But I like it when girls can hold really good eye contact with me. And one of the games that I do, one of the gambits that I do is let's say I'm talking to a girl and she has really good eye contact.

11:54 Well, no girl will ever be able to beat me when it comes to eye contact. Why? Because as we've talked about many times on this podcast, social pressure. The reason why guys can't maintain eye contact and girls for that matter is because lack of confidence. They're not able to take the social pressure of maintaining eye contact. But when you're in this game for a long time and you've talked to hundreds, thousands of girls, you've done public speaking, or maybe even you do a podcast like this one, your confidence grows.

12:23 And then you can just look at people in the eyes with no problem. It's the insecure people that fear eye contact. That's why girls don't get attracted to guys who have eyes that are like flitting about or like they can't even look at them. It's like, come on, seriously, you're intimidated by me? If you're intimidated by me, she thinks, then what's the world going to do to you? And if the world can push you around so easily, why would I want to be with you? Why would I be attracted to you?

12:47 No, we need to maintain that good eye contact. So your job is to just look in between her eyes and hold that eye contact. Okay, so what I do is when she has this good eye contact, I say, you know, Kelly, as I'm sitting here talking to you, I just realized something about you. She's like, what? And I'll be like, you have really, really good eye contact. And she's like, yeah, I know my dad this, my uncle that, blah, blah, blah. Someone taught her that. And I'll be like, okay, so you think you can beat me in a staring contest?

13:16 And she'll be like, oh, yeah, for sure. Okay, then boom, that staring contest starts. Now, it goes without saying you have to win the staring contest, bro. If you lose, you should be drawn, quartered, and unceremoniously shot out of the city from a catapult. Absolutely disgraceful. And then we're going to put an L on your forehead and you have to live in shame for the rest of your life. You have to win. The way you win is like this, okay? So first of all, do the look between her eyes thing.

13:43 You just look at that patch of skin between her eyes. Be a man. Hold the frame. Okay, so she's going to be looking at you. Now, if she's really good at this and like 30 seconds goes by, a minute goes by, I mean, dude, I've done it with some chicks where it was like two minutes goes on. Here's the trick to do is you say something that's going to make her laugh. So you say, you know, Kelly, as I'm looking at you, I think you'd look really good with a unibrow.

14:08 Why'd you shave it off anyway? And then, dude, they always crack up. And when they crack up, they look away. Boom, you win the contest. Or you could say, you know, Kelly, I've been looking at you this whole time and I just realized something about you. And she's like, what's that? And you'd be like, you look really good with a fanny pack on. And then she'll laugh. Or you look really good in rollerblades. Do you rollerblade, Kelly? Boom, she'll laugh. Hey, I just, from the corner of my eye, I just saw my ex-girlfriend come in.

14:34 Now, she's a Russian cage fighter. So if she attacks you, which I think she's coming, she's right over there. I think she's coming. Just lay on the floor and play dead. And then she'll laugh. So you'll want to say something funny like that. Now, these lines are all from my book, The Conversation Sniper, which I will send to you if you want it. Just hit me up, coachmarksingh at gmail.com. I'll send you this book. I would appreciate a review in exchange for the book. But I'll send it to you if you want.

15:00 And it has all these funny lines in it, such as those ones that I just said. All right. So after she supplicates, which means she loses, then you want to give her a compliment. And I always say, you know what's cute about you, Kelly? And she'll be like, what? And I'll be like, well, after you laugh, you get this little blink in your eye. Or I'll give her some non-typical compliment. So a good thing to do with girls is, you know, while you're talking to them, pay attention to things that they do that you think are cute, that you don't think every other guy is complimenting her about, right?

15:29 You never want to give obvious compliments. But when they supplicate to you, you want to reward the behavior. Since she lost the staring contest, that's really something you want to reward. So you reward her when she loses to you, when she supplicates to you, when she buys into your frame. All right. Now, another tactic is called the triangular gaze. And this is really, really powerful. What you want to do is, while you're talking to her, you can have what I call a wry smile on your face.

15:57 And a wry smile is kind of like a sexy smile with your lips closed, no teeth. And it's like kind of the smile you'd give her when you're like, man, I am going to destroy you tonight, right? Like you're just looking at her like, little girl, you have no idea what's coming to you. Then what you want to do is you want to look from her right eye to her left eye to her mouth, back up to her right eye. Then you might want to do it again.

16:20 Right eye, left eye, mouth, back up to right eye. It's a triangle, right? The two eyes and then the mouth. And that's what we do. And by the way, girls do this too. I noticed they do this when they get really attracted and they want you to kiss them. This is the sign of like, I want you, I'm attracted to you, you're turning me on and it's going to turn her on when you do it. So try that. You're looking at her, you guys are talking and you want to do this obviously when she's like, you know, has some attraction for you.

16:47 You don't want to deploy this on the chick that works at McDonald's that hardly knows you. And you're just like, all right, I'm going to do the triangle technique. And then you get arrested and you're like, God damn, that Mark Singh, his information sucks. No calibration, boys. You want to do this when she's attracted. Okay, and finally, I want to end this with this cool video or this kind of weird video, honestly, on YouTube. And it's called Video for Practicing Eye Contact. And it's this pretty cute brunette.

17:14 And what she does is she just stares at the camera. It's pretty kind of weird, dude, when you watch it. But it's good to like practice. If you're afraid of eye contact, if you have issues with this, you can go to YouTube and practice it right there on your computer and just maintain eye contact with her. Try the triangle thing. Try the technique where you're looking between her two eyes. And then you can even practice some of those lines. Why did you shave off your unibrow?

17:40 I think it really suits you. You look like you'd be really good at shot put. Like whatever you want to tell her, right? And then she'll laugh and look away. But all this eye contact stuff is really important. So don't underestimate the importance of it. About three to five seconds per session. And then once again, you want to reward behavior and punish behavior with your eye contact. All right, guys. That's it for me in this episode. I do appreciate you listening. Once again, if you want to get some one-on-one coaching with me, COVID is starting to end here.

18:07 And we're starting to open things back up. And I'm telling you, women are going to come out of their caves and just want to bang like nymphos. So you should be ready for that. If you want to get some coaching, CoachMarkSingh.com. Thank you again for listening. And I'll see you in the next episode. I'll see you in the next episode.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.