5 Signs You're Becoming an Alpha Male

0:00 Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, guys? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP. I really do appreciate it. If you've been riding with me for a long time, you know what to do. Smack yourself on the ass, you are a champion. Beers will be named after you that Vikings will drink before they go to war. Michael, thank you for that one.

0:31 It was a good one. If this is your first time coming to the show, welcome. What I try to do here is give the best information in the quickest amount of time possible, and today I got a really good one. Five signs you're becoming an alpha male. Before I jump into the content, I wanted to encourage all of you to jump over to my website, coachmarksing.com, and grab your free copy of my book, The Approach Formula, How to Approach a Girl Without Rejection. You can grab that by just jumping over to my website, clack the red button on the homepage there, and blah, you will get that free program.

1:12 You'll also get on my mailing list, and I'm going to send you tons of awesome shit in the weeks ahead. So take a minute to go do that. It will definitely be worth your time. All right, without further ado, let's go ahead and jump into it. So five signs you're becoming an alpha male. The first sign is people shut the hell up when you talk. You are used to being listened to, and when you talk, people listen to you. I was up in the woods last weekend with three girls, and they were talking, and I didn't even realize it.

1:40 And to be honest with you, it was kind of a socially inept move on my part, but I just started talking. I just, like, interrupted them, and they all went silent and looked at me and listened to me. That's because I was the alpha male of the group. I was the leader. And when you're the leader, you notice that people not only shut up when you talk, but they're also less inclined to interrupt you. And also, everybody looks at you when there's a joke being told in a group, and everybody's laughing, and they look at you to see what your response is.

2:10 So as you become an alpha male, and by the way, at the end of this podcast, we're going to talk a little bit about how to become an alpha male. So if these things don't happen to you yet, don't worry. They certainly didn't happen to me, you know, 10 years ago, but they do now. So I want to let you know that you can develop these things. But when you're the alpha male, people defer to you socially. They want to know what your reaction is. They'll shut up when you're talking, and you can interrupt people, which you shouldn't do, but you can do it, and they'll shut up and listen to you talk.

2:40 So I want you to pay attention on your effect on the group. When you talk, do people listen, or do you get interrupted? When everybody is laughing, do they look at you, or are you just kind of like the third guy in the pecking order who nobody really cares about your reaction? There's another thing I like to think about a lot, which is when I'm in a situation with, let's say, 10, 15, 20 people, and I think to myself, if the world ended right now, and if it was just us, like if all of us in this group got put on a desert island, who would end up being the leader of that group?

3:16 So let's say the next time you're in Starbucks, or Jamba Juice, or wherever the hell you tend to go, or like Jiu-Jitsu class, or whatever, take a look at all those people and ask yourself, who would naturally ascend to be the leader? Now, we might think that it's the most boisterous, aggressive guy, but that often isn't the case. In fact, cream rises to the top, and the truth always reveals itself, so even if you're not like an extrovert, you're loud, you're aggressive, but you still have a very strong frame, you have a very strong belief in yourself, and a very strong sense of entitlement and confidence, you may rise to the top, even if it takes a little bit of time.

3:54 So what you'll naturally find in group environments, like let's say there's a group of people who go camping together, and they go on some outward-bound trip. Well, what happens is the natural leader naturally ascends to the top-ranked position, and that's the alpha male position. So when you're the alpha male, even if you are kind of quiet, you're naturally going to ascend with time. So like if the end of the world happened, and we were all bunkering down, and there was 20 of us, the alpha males would ascend, and even if you're a friend of the alpha male, like you're the second guy in the pecking order, that's okay too, that's still alpha status.

4:32 Usually with alpha males, there's probably about two alphas within 10 guys. So are you one of those two guys? When you are, that's when women get really attracted to you. If you lead the men, the women will follow. All right, the second sign that you're becoming an alpha male is that you have a sense of entitlement. Entitlement means that you feel entitled to do what you're doing, to be where you are, and to basically have an existence here on this earth. Do you feel like you're entitled to be on this earth?

5:02 Do you feel like you're entitled to change lanes in front of somebody and be in that lane? Do you feel entitled to be on a plane when the plane is flying, or do you feel like you're apologizing for your existence? See, a guy who's entitled, he feels entitled because he feels valuable to the world. So if you don't feel valuable to the world, you're not going to feel entitled. Me, for example, I know that wherever I go, I bring good energy, I bring good charisma, I bring good integrity to that situation.

5:34 So I literally feel like that I'm kind of like a gift that I give to give everybody everywhere I go. I go to Target, I go to Walmart, I go to Sportsman's Warehouse, I go to Jack's or all these places where I like to go. I feel like when I walk in, it's almost like I'm bettering the vibe of the entire place because I know I have good energy. I know I'm an alpha male, I'm a coach, I'm a fucking champion. So it's like, dude, you guys are stoked to have me here.

6:01 And that's the way you start feeling when you step into your alpha male role. It's like, dude, I bring value to the world, so I'm entitled to be here. When I get on an airplane, I'm not feeling bad because I'm another passenger who's taking up space. I feel good because I'm going to save every motherfucker on that plane if it crashes. And it's funny because when I get onto airplanes, I always get into the exit row because I'm really tall, I'm 6'2", and I need that extra leg room.

6:26 God, dude, when you fly on a plane and you're over 6'1", it's so uncomfortable. A lot of you guys know what I'm talking about. But anyway, I always get that exit row seat. And the lady always asks me, are you prepared to do the duties if this plane crashes? And I always tell her with a completely straight look on my face, I will save every goddamn person on this plane. Yes, I'm ready. And that's the way I feel. If the plane crashes, I'm going to be chucking people out that doorman, flinging them out like no one's business.

6:54 Like, come here, grandma. Come here, little kid. Come here, lady. I'm just going to be chucking people to fucking safety. And then I'm going to be on the news that night getting a goddamn award and just be the freaking hero of the plane crash. And that's the way you have to feel. You feel entitled. Like, I don't have to apologize for being here. You guys are stoked to have me here because I'm a hero in the making. That's what an alpha male feels like. All right, that goes into number three.

7:21 You truly, truly don't give a fuck about what people think of you. You do not care. The next time you're in a situation and you do something that, let's say, is a little bit societally unacceptable, right? Like, let's say, just off the top of my head, you take a piss and you don't wash your hands. Bro, you just took a shower that morning. Your dick is cleaner than a bar of soap. The only thing you literally touched while you're peeing was your dick and you don't wash your hands.

7:50 And you're, like, all afraid of what people think of you and you think someone's going to, like, notice it. Fuck them. I want you to literally say, fuck what you think. I do not care. I'm living my life the way I want to. I know my dick is cleaner than a bar of soap. So don't trip on me, man. And even if you do trip on me, I'm going to be like, bro, why are you paying so much attention to what I'm doing in the bathroom?

8:12 Like, what are you, watching me? Always turn it around on the other person. So when you have a good sense of entitlement, when you feel like an alpha male, you're no longer caring what people think. Why? Because validation comes from yourself. Remember, masculinity is self-validating. It creates validation from within itself. You know you're a champion. Again, and going back to my other podcast about congruence, when you have integrity, when you have a genuine intent to better this world, then you don't have to care what people think because you know you're adding to this world.

8:45 You know you're that bright light that when people get exposed to, they're light brightens as well. It's just like a really hot burning fire. When you put it next to a fire that's smoldering, it's going to light that fire up and it's going to burn hot too. Well, you're that fire. You're that alpha male. You're bringing value, integrity, humor, charisma, and positivity to this world. So you don't have to care what people think because you're a light worker. Everywhere you go, you work the light and you raise other people's light.

9:15 And that is what an alpha male does. He's a leader. All right. The fourth sign that you're becoming an alpha male is you no longer have to prove your confidence. When you first get into this game and John and I did a podcast about this a long time ago, but we talked about how when you first get into this game, you kind of want to push your confidence onto other people. And a lot of times that can come off as kind of arrogant. Well, the reason you're doing that is because you don't really have true confidence and you almost feel like you have to prove it to others to feel that way within yourself.

9:47 Well, when you get really confident, you truly do not care what people think and you no longer have to push it on other people. You just are. When you fully embody mastery, you no longer talk about what you're trying to master. And I use this example in a previous podcast as well. I can't even remember. There's so damn many podcast episodes, but I said, you know, the guy who can really fight doesn't go around wearing tap out shirts. He doesn't go around talking about how he can fight, how he's training in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and Muay Thai.

10:19 He just is and he shuts up about it and he becomes very humble and almost meek in a way. And that goes back to the tattoo that I'm going to get, the meek will inherit the earth. And meek in its original translation means those who can fight but choose not to. So it's the same thing with confidence. When you have really good confidence, what you ultimately are is relaxed and not caring what people think. And you walk around in a way that seems very peaceful and mellow and you just like, you don't, your voice doesn't shudder and you're very confident, yet you're not trying to push it on other people, if that makes sense.

10:54 It's kind of hard to explain, but it's like this ease in your own skin, this comfort in who you are, this unapologetic feeling about what you say, this taking up of space in a way where you feel totally justified to be there and then this bright light that you bring into everywhere that you go, that is an alpha male. All right, number five is your belief systems change. So I want to go over some of the beta male mindsets that you might have now and they're as follows.

11:25 I'm not good enough. I need others to accept me. Should I act this way or that way? I need others to give me validation, particularly women. My mood depends on circumstances as well as other people. I act in a way that will get me acceptance. I don't accept myself. I'm not okay with myself and I'm insecure. Okay, now let's go into the alpha male belief systems. I am good enough. I accept myself. I act how I want to act. I'm strong enough to give others validation.

11:58 I generate my own mood. I am genuine and not afraid to be myself. I'm okay with who I am and I'm very deeply secure with my flaws. Those are the alpha male belief systems and those are the belief systems that you want to embody. Now begs the question, well, Mark, I have none of these, bro. Like I'm all beta all the way. Hey, that's okay. I was too. How do we become alpha? Working on yourself. It's very simple. You work on yourself. You continue doing what you're doing.

12:28 Listening to podcasts like this one, even getting NLP coaching with somebody like me will reprogram the programming inside your head and make you believe those types of things about yourself. So you may have a belief that you're not good enough. Well, that comes because it was given to you before you could defend yourself. When you were a kid, somebody gave it to you, whether it was your mom, your dad, an uncle, a sibling, who knows who it was, but it was given to you before you could defend yourself.

12:56 Then you bought into it, you believed it, and when you believe it, just like we talked about in the previous podcast about the law of attraction, your reality starts to reflect what you believe, and then you believe it more. Then when you believe it more, it becomes your identity. Now you're a guy who identifies as being not good enough. So what are girls going to do? They're going to reject you. So with NLP, Neuro Linguistic Programming, which is what I do with my clients, we go in and we fucking remove it, man.

13:23 We delete it. We go in, we find it, and we pass, boop. Delete, and it's gone. Literally, one session, gone, and then we replace it with a better belief system. I am good enough. I generate my own mood. I'm okay with who I am, and I'm deeply secure with my flaws. Yes, we can get that kind of movement in one session. If you want to learn more about that, check out the epic testimonials on my sales page. Go to CoachMarkSingh.com and click on Coaching. It'll tell you all about it.

13:53 So guys, I want to wrap up with one more, and this should be completely obvious, is you are unapologetic. I'm not going to go on a huge tangent on this, but that's the basic principle of this entire podcast, is as an alpha male, you are unapologetic about who you are, what you want, what you do, your identity, everything about you. There's no fucking apologies. You know that you have integrity. You know that you are here to better the world. You have a purpose to make other people better.

14:24 You have integral intentions in everything that you do. Therefore, what do you have to apologize for? So the next time you're in a social situation, ask yourself, what am I bringing to this social situation? Am I bettering the mood, or am I bringing it down? Would I rise to be a leader, or would I just be a follower? Do people look to me to lead them when there's questions about the situation, or do they pass me over and look to somebody else? As you become more confident in yourself, as you believe in yourself more, and know that your intentions are congruent with integrity, then you are going to start to emulate some of those alpha male traits, and as those alpha male traits get emulated, you're going to start getting results, and as you get results, it's a snowball effect.

15:12 You're going to become more deeply rooted in your belief system. More behavior will manifest out of that, and then, like I said, it's just this snowball that keeps growing and growing and growing until you fully step into your alpha male self, which, honestly, is who you were meant to be. All right, guys, that's it for me in this podcast. I hope you got some value out of it. Once again, jump on over to my website to check out both my coaching and also grab your free program, The Approach Formula, how to approach a girl without fear of rejection, and why you shouldn't reject her is because you feel good.

15:46 You feel like you're giving her something valuable. You're giving her good energy. Therefore, it's almost equivalent to giving her $100, and you don't feel apologetic about approaching that girl. That's how to approach a girl as an alpha male. Once again, guys, I thank you so much for listening, and I'll see you in the next episode.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.