How to 10x Your Happiness With Lifestyle Design

0:00 Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, guys? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UNP. I really do appreciate it. If you've been listening for a long time, smack yourself on the ass. You are a champion. If you're new here, welcome. What we do here on this podcast is try to give you the best advice in the quickest time possible to maximize yourself as a man, maximize your attractiveness to women, and maximize your happiness, which is what this podcast episode is going to be about, how to 10x your happiness with lifestyle design.

0:47 So many of you guys listen to this podcast in order to become more attractive to women, but I would suggest you to listen to this because when you maximize your happiness, when you maximize your lifestyle, you actually will become more attractive to women. Because, again, states are contagious, and the way you feel about yourself, the way you feel about your life, how successful you are, etc., the more that gets translated to women and the more they get attracted to you. So, in this episode, we're going to talk about the counterintuitive way to set up a life for yourself that you can be happy with without having to strive for millions of dollars, without having to put yourself under the pressure of going after things that you don't truly want, just because society says you should.

1:34 So, before I jump into the content, I want to thank all of you for the awesome reviews. If you could leave me a review, once again, you've heard me say this a million times, email me at coachmarksingh at gmail.com, and I'll send you a bunch of good shit. I'll leave it at that. If you listen to this podcast at all, you're like, my God, this guy goes for the reviews. But if you go to my iTunes page, you may be impressed with all the awesome reviews, and that's only because I ask for them.

1:58 One thing about business is if you don't ask for people to do something, they're not going to do it. I have friends who have podcasts, other associates, and I look at their iTunes page, and they got, like, way fewer reviews compared to the amount of downloads that they get, and that's simply because they don't ask. They're afraid to ask. But when you ask for things, people hook you up, and when I get reviews, the podcast grows, which is my single-minded purpose with this thing, is to grow it, to help more guys out, to help you guys out, and reviews really help me do that.

2:28 So, now you know why I always ask for them. They're super, super important. And once again, if you do it, email me at CoachMarkSingh at gmail.com, and I'll send you some cool shit. All right, let's jump into the content. So, in society today, especially in the United States, there's this message that's given to us, and it's force-fed to us, that we need to make millions of dollars. We need to have this lavish lifestyle. We need to have Mercedes-Benz, Rolex watches, yachts, Bentleys, and everything else that, quote-unquote, equals happiness.

2:59 But let me ask you a question, bro. Would that equal happiness for you? Do you really, really want the Ferrari? Do you really, really want the mansion? Do you really, really want the yacht and all the things that comes with that? Hey, if you do, that's cool. I understand. And I'm not saying that there's no happiness found in those kinds of luxuries. But what I want to ask you is, what do you really want? What does your perfect life look like? So, the intelligent way to do anything is to work from the end result backwards.

3:31 And when it comes to lifestyle design, what you want to do is you want to imagine your best day. What does our day consist of? What kinds of things are we doing? What's really, truly important to us? Not important to us through having to prove to others that we can make money. Not important to us because we believe that women are attracted to money and success. But important to us from our own enjoyment, our own excitement. What can we do every day that will keep us happy, satisfied, at peace, and excited?

4:03 Okay, so when we think about that, for a lot of us, suddenly the Bentleys and the Ferraris and the Mansions don't really become that important. But instead, if you're anything like me, you may want what's more akin to excitement, to adventure. So me, for example, what I want is adventure. I want to go deep into the backcountry, hunting with my boys on ATVs, camping, you know, living with very little, using my bushcraft skills to survive in the deep wilderness, getting in encounters with wildlife, using my skills to procure water, to build fires.

4:39 Like, that's what I'm really into. Does that cost a shit ton of money? No. What's more important to me then is the freedom to do it, to make enough money to accomplish that. So what I do is every year I go through my life and I say, okay, what would I love to experience this year? So here are a few things that I've determined are the most important things for me. First of all, I want to go on a vacation or an adventure, as I call them, every three months.

5:05 And that's going to take a week off from work, a week off from podcasting. Can I do that? Okay. So what kinds of things do I want to do? I want to go to Maldives, Bali. I want to go to Indonesia, Australia. I want to travel a lot with my family. I want to go deep into the backcountry. I want to go scuba dive in caves. I want to do like some kick-ass shit that gets my adrenaline going, right? I want to skydive and have adventures.

5:31 And fortunately, my girl, Marissa, she likes that kind of shit too. Like the other day, I was like, Marissa, I want to fucking go up to Wyoming on the North Platte River and get a 12-foot raft and raft down for like a week and then camp on the banks and do a rafting trip where we're fishing, fishing for our food and like have dry bags on that raft and go do that. And I want to do it with my buddy. And she's like, well, what about me?

5:56 What don't you want to do with me? I'm like, you do that? And she's like, oh, hell yeah. I always wanted to do something like that. So that also has to do with like picking your girl, right? Like you need a girl who wants the same shit that you do. And I'm amazed that I found a girl who's so hot and still feminine, but it's willing to go into the woods with me and do these adventures with me. But like, to me, that's the ultimate. And I want to have a family I can do that kind of stuff with.

6:20 So what you do is you design your life from the end result backwards. And then what you do is you say, okay, that's my perfect day. So what does my perfect week look like? Then what does my perfect month look like? Then what does my perfect year look like? Now, I personally don't think that we need to map out our 10-year goals or 20-year goals. I just think that's too far away. We don't know who we're going to be in that amount of time. But we can certainly map out our one to two-year goals or what our lifestyle needs to look like.

6:53 And when I say lifestyle too, it's like, what kind of food are you eating? How often are you going out to dinner? How many girls are in your life? How many girls are you talking to? We need to get really clear about this because when I talk to clients, they're like, I just want girls. I just want happiness. I just want money. But see, you're never going to accomplish anything unless you get very fucking specific about what it looks like. So we design our lifestyle first and based on the lifestyle, then we can know, okay, this is how much money I have to make.

7:24 This is how much time I need. This is what I need to accomplish. And these are the parameters I need to set up in order to accomplish those things that I truly, truly desire. I don't desire them because society says I should. No, it's because it's in my heart. This is what I want to do. Like for me, bro, it's like, yeah, sometimes I look at a BMW M3 and I'm like, bro, that's sick. I really want that. And maybe one day I'll have it. But for me, I'd rather put my money into, I love knives.

7:51 I love like hunting equipment. I love guns. I love ATVs and going on vacations. And we just went to Honduras a couple months ago and things like that really get my juices flowing. And I want that more than those material things. Would I rather go to Australia or would I rather buy a Rolex watch? Personally, I'd rather go to Australia and go train with the Aborigines down there and see some of their bushcraft skills and like to have them take me out into the wilderness and show me how they procure water in the middle of a desert.

8:23 That's way more interesting to me personally than getting some nice watch. I want the watch too. And you can have both if you really want it. But then you need to say, well, how much time and work would I need to put in to get that? And is it worth it? So there's this concept here that's really important is what amount of work or what amount of sacrifice is worth to you what you really want? And you need to balance that. Now, for those of us who are entrepreneurs, we have a much bigger opportunity for earning potential, don't we?

8:56 So for me, with my business, very possible that it's going to become a gigantic multi-million dollar business to which I could sell. But then again, I have to ask myself, do I want this to be just a one-man show? Or do I want to hire other coaches? Do I want to hire a sales staff? Do I want to create products and deal with, you know, all the customer service questions? Or do I just want to keep one-on-one coaching going and just be happy with that? My coach, for example, he's an NLP coach.

9:24 He's the man who trained me. The guy is a fucking genius. I think the world of him. You know, he just coaches people one-on-one. And he's been a millionaire. He's been very successful in many businesses. He still is a millionaire. But, like, he takes a lower salary because his lifestyle and his freedom is more important to him. He's a lot like me. He likes to get out, have adventures, have time with his new wife. He just got married. You know, they're building a family. And that's important to him.

9:53 So you need to see freedom versus money versus luxury versus adventure. And really map out your life. What does your perfect life look like? Then work backwards. Now, those of you who are stuck on a fixed salary, those of you who are still young and don't have that money yet, well, you're not necessarily relegated to A, that salary for the rest of your life, and B, the shitty situation that you're in for the rest of your life. So if you could really have it all, and what I mean have it all, I mean that which will truly give you happiness, not that which will placate your ego or prove to others that you're quote-unquote successful.

10:31 For you, let's say nobody else is watching. It doesn't fucking matter what anybody else's opinion is. For you, what does your true happiness look like? What is a true lifestyle that gives you happiness look like? You're often going to find that it doesn't take that much money. I mean, for the vast majority of you, probably $10,000 a month would be enough. Is it that hard to make $10,000 a month? I'm going to tell you from experience. No, it's pretty fucking easy, especially when you're an entrepreneur. Now, if you are stuck in a salary, if you are stuck in a job, well, you can have side hustles, can't you?

11:04 And in today's world, with the internet and all the potential possibilities, it's super easy to get passive revenue. So you're getting passive revenue. What are you doing with your time? Are you just standing around masturbating and playing video games and watching Netflix? You're really going after what you want. And for a lot of you guys, getting good with women right now is what you want. And to me too, a big part of my happiness is training. I love to take firearms classes. I love to take jiu-jitsu classes.

11:31 I love to hire coaches. I'm always hiring coaches because for me, learning is exciting. So I build that into my lifestyle. I build adventures into my lifestyle, time with my family. Then what happens is once you build that out, you realize, holy shit, I don't need as much money because you do the math. You say, okay, per month, this is how much I need. That amounts to this much per week. That amounts to this much per hour. How can I make that in a week with working the littlest amount of time possible?

12:01 Okay, boom, I got that done. Then you deploy that plan. Once you succeed in that plan, then you can have the lifestyle you want and then you're happy. You're happy. And you can keep striving for better things. Certainly, I'm going to keep striving for better things like, you know, going into the backcountry and doing all this stuff. I don't know if that's going to satisfy me for the rest of my life. So that's why about every year I sit down and I work backwards. Okay, this year, this is what I'm going to do.

12:28 And I also break it up into quarters. So first quarter of 2020, here's what I want to accomplish with my business. Here's the trip I'd really love to go on. Here's what I'm going to allow myself to buy. And this is the experience I'm going to have. You plan that out from the end result backwards to today. Then you ask yourself, what can I do today that's going to get me to that result in the quickest, easiest way possible? Is obsessing over my logo for two hours in Photoshop going to get me closer to that goal?

12:59 Or is releasing a new podcast going to get me closer to that goal? Obviously, releasing the podcast is going to do that. That's what I'm focusing on. So for me right now, I'm launching a new website. And I've decided to do some blog posts. I decided to give you guys free lead magnet, which is basically free material where I get your email. Then I'm going to be emailing you guys like once a week with really good material. That's going to get me more clients and that's going to amount to more freedom for me that I don't have to maybe do this podcast as much.

13:31 Maybe I don't have to do as much one-on-one coaching so that I can have more freedom to do what I want to do. So again, I'm designing my lifestyle. And from that design, you know what you have to do. Rather than arbitrarily going for these goals because society says you should, what do you really want? What does your perfect day look like? I have a business associate who he loves to just take walks in the city. He loves to walk and he loves to go to nice restaurants and drink wine and all that stuff.

14:05 Stuff that's totally uninteresting to me, but that's what he wants. So he's designed his lifestyle around that. And the guy's making 15 grand a month. We're literally working about four hours a week doing that. And he's a very close associate of mine. So this kind of lifestyle is possible for you when you set the goal and you work backwards from it. That's really the ultimate point of this. Are you just spinning your wheels or are you going through life with intention, with purpose, with a mission and a clear cut goal of what you want that's going to make you happy?

14:37 Not because it satisfies others, but because it satisfies you. So now I want you to think about what that looks like. And this is going to go beautifully into my next podcast, which is your HOP list, which is going to help you define what that looks like. And I also want to do a podcast about managing your money. The HOP list podcast is going to be coming up on Friday. So if you resonated with this whatsoever, that's going to be an important step to defining for you, you know, what your priorities are, what you're really going for, what's going to truly make you happy.

15:09 And then we can talk about next week about managing money so that you got money coming in and you're rewarding yourself correctly for the money coming in and saving it and giving some of it away and doing all these really important things. Based on what you truly want from your life. All right, guys. So that's it for me for this podcast. I do appreciate you listening. Once again, if you found any value whatsoever, if you can leave me that review, I'll get your name tattooed on my neck and I'll smack you upside the head and call you a champion.

15:37 Email me at coachmarksingh at gmail.com and I'll send you some cool shit. Stay tuned for Friday for the HOP list. And I'm going to explain to you exactly how to set up your HOP list so you can get clarity on what it is that you truly want. And don't wait for happiness in the future as some arbitrary point that you're going to arrive to. Grab happiness right now because you'd be surprised at how little money you need to actually live a life that brings you happiness.

16:03 Thanks again for listening and I'll see you in the next episode. I'll see you in the next episode.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.