Mark's Step by Step Seduction Framework: The 4 Pillars of Attraction

0:00 Welcome to The Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, you champions? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP. I really do appreciate you. And I want to ask you, are you having a hard time in life, brother? Are things going not so great for you? You got challenges. You got problems. You got shit that you just don't want to deal with. I'm going to give you some advice.

0:34 Suck it the fuck up. Go into the problem. The obstacle is the way. And be a fucking man, okay? Enough complaining. Enough bitching. Enough going into that feminine energy. Suck it the fuck up. Embrace the suck. Get the job done. And you will be better for it. All right, with that out of the way, gentlemen, we are going to talk about the four pillars of attraction. Four pillars, which is probably why a lot of you guys are not getting women attracted to you the way you wish you were.

1:04 I have guys ask me all the time, what do I do in the first conversation? Which, by the way, I addressed in the previous episode called the OQQP method. Definitely listen to that. If you haven't yet, check it out. It's the episode before this one. And now we're going to talk about the four pillars of attraction, which is what you need to talk about in the first conversation to get her attracted enough to you to not only give you her phone number, but also actually text you back.

1:31 It's actually not that hard to get phone numbers, to be honest with you. Most guys can do it. If you ask a girl and she's relatively okay with you rapport-wise, she doesn't outright dislike you, she's probably going to give you her number. But does it mean she's going to text you back? Hell to the no, as a lot of you guys have experienced. It's because you don't have enough attraction. You need to get girls adequately attracted enough to you in order to not only text you back, but dude, we need so much attraction.

1:58 She needs to get ready, get her hair done, put on her makeup, drive to a strange place, either being your house or a venue that you're meeting at, and or have you pick her up and go on a date with you on a Thursday night, Wednesday night, Saturday night, whenever it is, when she could be doing something else, dating another guy, hanging out with her friends, eating ice cream and watching Netflix. Your attraction needs to be so much, in fact, that she's willing to overcome all those obstacles.

2:24 Now, a lot of you guys are not on your head because you too have had situations where you're able to yank numbers, but you just don't get replies back or you get replies back, but they don't agree to go on the date with you. There's not enough attraction. I really want you to remember this. Attraction is always the issue. It's just like in business. Enough money coming in, all issues are solved. Money solves all problems in businesses. This is the same thing with women. Attraction solves all problems.

2:48 Think about it. If she's attracted enough, would she go back to her ex-boyfriend? No. Would she flake on you? No. Would she come to your house if you text her at 2 a.m. and you're like, hey, come over? Yes. Will she pretty much do anything you want her to do and not cheat on you, not leave you for another dude? Yes. It's all about attraction. In this episode, we are going to talk about the four pillars of attraction that you have to hit in every single conversation that you have.

3:21 Now, I did a podcast about this. I just looked in 2020, so it's been three years, but this is a central tenet in my coaching program, along with frame control, attraction-building material, building sexual tension, qualifying, which, in fact, are the four pillars of attraction. I teach on all these things because they're so damn important, and most guys have the biggest problem with either the first conversation or the first date and getting a second date. That's usually the biggest sticking point. So what is it? It's all about attraction.

3:53 Attraction solves all problems when it comes to women. Got enough attraction? You can fuck up so many times and absolutely be a douchebag, as horrible as that is, and the girl will still stick around. And a lot of you guys have seen that, too, where a girl was so into you that she would do shit and say shit and act in ways that blew your fucking mind. Both myself and my clients, my wingmen, people who have come into my program, have had chicks do the most insane shit.

4:22 Right off the top of my head, I remember years ago when I was a douchebag, I definitely wouldn't do this again. But when I was a douchebag, I had this girl so fucking into me, I could text her at 3 a.m. or call her and be like, hey, what are you doing? She's like, I'm sleeping. I'd be like, come over. And she'd be like, okay. And she'd be all excited about it. She would get up out of bed, get her makeup completely done, and I shit you not, drive a fucking hour to come see me.

4:48 She lived in L.A. I lived in Orange County at the time. She would drive an hour to come see me. That's how much attraction there was, and we can even say that's how much emotion there was. Attraction is the beginning stages of deep emotion, which is the beginning stages of love. Once you get that emotion, once you get that love in place, they'll do anything. I mean, we've seen it ourselves. Girls will murder somebody in order to get what they want from a dude who they're in love with.

5:14 And guys will do the same thing too. It's human psychology. So attraction, attraction, attraction is the most important thing, and we need to think about this logically. We need to go in with a structured approach where we're not just going in willy-nilly, just randomly doing shit and hoping it works out, which is the method of a lot of dudes. No, we're going in very structurally, very intentionally, and we have a fucking plan. Plan means I'm going to go in, I'm going to execute these four things, the four pillars of attraction, and if I do that, the chances of her getting attracted enough to me to not only give her my phone number, but also text me back, go on a date with me, make out with me at the end of the date, and yes, have sex, is going to go up exponentially because of these four pillars of attraction.

6:02 So let's jump into it. Pillar number one is the most important thing you will ever learn from me, and you will ever learn from any other pickup artist coach, provided he even teaches it, which is a whole different topic. Some people don't even fucking teach this. So if you're going to go hire a coach, make sure they teach this because this is the most important thing, and my clients who have worked with me, you guys who have listened to me for a long time should know what this is.

6:27 What is it? Frame control, bro-tendo, the single most important thing when seducing a woman. So the first of the four pillars of attraction is frame control. What is frame control? It's leading the interaction, showing her you're not to be fucked with, being the masculine presence by wanting less than she does. If she toys with you, pushes your boundaries, or fucks with you in any way whatsoever, you reverse it on her. You are unapologetic, you are masculine, and you lead that woman to where she wants to be led.

7:00 The best way I can explain it is a woman wants to feel handled by you. Handled, which means tucked under your wing, shown a good time, protected, and led to where she wants to be led to. Now, obviously, this is a 20-minute episode. I don't have a ton of time to go deep into frame control. So here's what I strongly suggest for you. Search my name as well as the two keywords, frame control, and listen to every single goddamn episode I've ever released on frame control because it is that goddamn important.

7:33 You need to be in the masculine role, which means you need to lead her. If there's ever a situation where she's leading you, where you're explaining yourself to her, where you are trying to sell yourself to her, where you are giving her the masculine presence, she's going to lose attraction for you, not text you back, not go on a date with you. And a lot of you guys may have experienced this, where you inadvertently gave her the frame because, dude, you were never taught this shit.

7:58 Nobody teaches it. I'm one of the few pickup artist coaches that does. You inadvertently gave her that frame thinking, if I give her the power, if I give her what she wants, if I let her lead, she's going to like me more. And then what happened? She didn't get attracted to you. Maybe you got the number just because she didn't want to have a confrontational interaction and say no to you. You got the number. She didn't text you back. Usually, it's because of frame control, and frame control also involves your voice.

8:25 Quick tip about your voice. If your voice is going up at the end, all my clients are nodding right now and probably laughing because I say this all the fucking time. If your voice goes up at the end, it means you're supplicating to her, giving her the frame, such as, hey, Kelly, how was your day today? Like that. If your voice goes down at the end, that communicates authority. It communicates you're not to be fucked with. It communicates that strong frame. Hey, Kelly, how was your day today?

8:50 And it doesn't have to be condescending. It doesn't have to be like, hey, give me your fucking license and registration like a pissed off cop. All it is, is you're the authority. It's like you're the dad and you're talking to your six-year-old girl who just got out of school. How was school today? It just slightly goes down at the end. That communicates authority. So inadvertently, and this happens to so many guys, a lot of you listening right now, I guarantee you do this inadvertently. You don't even know it.

9:17 Your voice goes up at the end without you even realizing it. This happens because subconsciously, you believe that girl is worth more than you are. You believe she's above you in the social hierarchy. So just like she is standing above you and you're below her, your voice goes up like this. Whereas when you have a strong frame, you feel in your mind that you're actually kind of above her socially. So your voice goes down because she's below you. Now I say this very carefully on the podcast because there's a lot of people who get buttered.

9:47 A lot of guys who hyperextend their vagina in their pants. And a lot of women who hyperextend their ponytails on their head whenever I say shit like this. But all it implies is that the dude is leading. I guarantee you for every single woman out there, she gets wet in her vagina by a dude who leads her, who has a strong frame, who's not to be fucked with. If she pushes on him, which women will do because they're going to test your boundaries, he shows her immediately he's not to be fucked with.

10:16 Not in an angry way, and I really want to stress that. But in a fun, playful, you can't even get to me because my frame is so strong kind of way. So let's look at our tonality. Let's analyze if we do indeed control the interaction when speaking to women. And let's see if we actually explain ourselves to women. Try to sell ourselves to women. You never want to come off like you're trying to sell yourself to them. Yes, you can show off to them, as I talked about in my previous episode.

10:43 But you never want to come off like you're trying to earn their endearment. That shows a weak frame. So the most important thing among all others is frame control. And I'll take that to my grave. Somebody comes to me and says, what's more important, being fun or having a strong frame? I will choose strong frame every day of the week and twice on Sunday because that's the differentiating factor. Once guys understand this frame control thing, once they remap their brain to feel like they are the high value dude and their voice tonality reflects that belief, everything changes for them.

11:16 Literally everything. That's why with this concept alone, as well as the NLP remapping that I do on my clients, their results fucking skyrocket. It's literally insane some of the results that these guys get just after learning those two things and letting me get their hands on them with the NLP brain remapping. I want to make you feel so worth it like you're the hot chick in your own mind and therefore you lead the interaction and you don't give a shit what happens. You don't try to sell yourself to her.

11:42 You lead the frame. And if she fucks with you, you let her know that does not stand. Pillar number two is value, boys. Value. What did I just say? I said, what would I rather have, a strong frame or would I rather be fun? Well, I would rather have a strong frame if I had to choose between the two, but I would definitely like to have both if possible. And that's what the second pillar is. It's being fun, giving value, keeping her interested. Now, this is all done with the attraction building gambits that I share with you guys a little bit here on this podcast.

12:14 But, of course, all my gold is given to my clients in my three-month coaching program where I tell you what to talk about. I tell you how to elicit attraction. We have all these gambits, like a million different things you can choose from, psychological games, tricks, techniques, storytelling, all these cool things to analyze her personality and get her emotionally invested in you. That's a foregone conclusion. It's like killing an ant with a nuclear warhead, and that's the analogy I use with my clients. I'm like, bro, once you throw this shit into it, all the stuff I'm going to teach you about building attraction from a value standpoint, it's over.

12:49 Now, we have four pillars of attraction. I'm going to get to the other two soon. But even if you just have frame control and even if you just give value to even a slight level, you'll get her probably attracted enough to give you her phone number and text you back and probably go on a date with you. Really, you just need those two. But you put in the other two, number three and four, it's over. There's no chance. Literally, girls will beg you to text them, as I've had happen many times, as well as my clients have had.

13:18 We have a joke in my coaching. Did you get her to beg? Now, this may seem like we're condescending to women. We're not. You can make a dude beg if you're a woman listening, if he's attracted enough. Okay? This works. And I've seen many guys beg. And you don't want to be that dude. But we have literally had girls beg. Girls will suggest, hey, let's hang out. What are you doing this weekend? You'd be like, oh, so you want to hang out? She'll be like, yeah, yeah, for sure.

13:41 You'd be like, I don't know. You're not a stalker Texas Ranger, are you? You're not going to be showing up in my backyard with a ghillie suit and a sniper rifle, are you? No, no, I swear I'm not like that. Beg me. Beg me. Okay? If you can say that with enough conviction and she's attracted enough, she will beg you. I have had it happen dozens of times where me and my boys are just challenging each other. Dude, try to get her to beg you. And I'll do it to my girlfriends too.

14:06 I'll be like, dude, try to get that dude to beg you. And guys will do it. You don't want to be that dude. Believe me. That is so beta cuck you don't even know. You will be a fucking beta cuck fluffer. You do not want to be that dude. Never beg a woman for anything, be it her phone number, be it sex. Your tears will not work as lubricant for sex. But girls will do it. And frankly, that's okay. They're so attracted, they will straight beg you.

14:31 So I want to ask you, how far away have you been from straight begging from a chick? Even a chick who was into you and you weren't really into her, how far away were you from that? I'm letting you know that, first of all, it's not your fault. You didn't have the education. But bro, I'm letting you know how powerful this shit is. If you get this shit mapped in and down and you can deliver it into your conversations, your attraction building sequences, it's over. The old nuclear warhead falling on an ant's fucking head, way overkill.

15:01 That's how much attraction you can get. So value is basically storytelling, cold reading, push-pull, reverse cold reading, debate qualification, false disqualifiers, teasing her, messing with her, having fun like kids on the schoolyard. I'm always asked, of course, what the most important thing is. It'll be frame control until the day I die. But this is the second most important thing. And that is having fun, giving value. Girls just want to have fun. That horrible song I always allude to in this podcast by Bette Midler or some shit.

15:33 I don't know who the fuck sang it, but it was horrible, bro. God, that shit just gives me an instant headache. So the first pillar is what, boys? Frame control. That's right. Go study my shit if you haven't already. So important. Second pillar is value. There's a lot of valuable content that I've dropped on this podcast. Just look for things that say like attraction building technique or anything that's about getting a girl attracted to you. That's value-based. Again, I also strongly suggest you listen to my previous episode, the open question-question pry method, which will help you in the first 30 seconds.

16:07 Then you go cherry-pick my content, get some value-adding gambits that you can add in, understand frame control to a deep level. Whether or not you work with me, that's up to you, obviously. But you also need to deal with what's in here. And if you're listening on audio, I'm pointing at my head. Between the two ears, that's the most important place, not only for your success in life, not only for your peace and confidence and enthusiasm about being alive, but most importantly in this episode to get girls attracted to you.

16:36 You need to fucking believe that you're the alpha, you're the champion, you're the fucking prize. If you don't believe that, it ain't happening. It just isn't. The third pillar of attraction is sexual tension. Sexual tension. I have done episodes about it. Go check them out. But once you deploy the first two, which is frame control and then value, you're going to get signs of attraction from her. We deploy sexual tension if and only if she's attracted to us. What are signs of attraction? Playing with her hair, licking her lips, touching you, laughing at jokes that aren't funny, stepping into your personal space, asking you personal questions.

17:12 We get several of those signs of attraction. We can deploy sexual tension. I have a lot of techniques about it, but the easiest one for you guys to memorize is basically this. So why don't you have a boyfriend? I bet it's because you're a bad kisser, huh? She'll be like, no, I'm not. You'll be like, yeah, you are. I know you do the helicopter tongue maneuver, the jackhammer tongue maneuver. I heard from all your friends, your kissing is horrible. Now what's going to happen? You guys are going to talk about kissing, thereby creating sexual tension.

17:40 Creating sexual tension is simply talking about anything that has to do with sex, physicality, you guys hooking up, you guys having chemistry, the fireworks that are going to come out of it. Another one I like to use is asking her what her sign is. So what's your sign? I don't know anything about signs, boys, but this shit works where she says, I'm a Pisces or a bicycle tire or a fucking flintlock or whatever these stupid signs are, right? So she's like, I'm a Pisces. And I'm like, oh no, I'm an Aquarius.

18:07 It will never work out. She's like, why? And you'd be like, haven't you heard when Aquariuses and Pisces kiss? It's like an automatic explosion of chemistry, fireworks. It's so intense. Don't tell anybody this, but it's so intense. I've heard people have died from that shit. People have just fucking, their heads have blown up just because of the chemistry. And she's like, hey, stop being stupid. And then you can role play. You'd be like, you know, if I kissed you right now, if I just grabbed you right here behind your hair and just kind of brought you in and whispered in your ear just like this and slid my lips down your cheek and just brushed past your lips and you can role play out that sexual tension.

18:45 Oh my hell, boys. You get frame control. You get value. You get sexual tension into the mix like this. That's what I'm fucking talking about. Girls will get obsessed and beg you for your phone number. Quick side tip on this. I do not suggest making out with girls in the nightclub for two reasons. First of all, and most obviously, your reputation. Okay, I used to do it all the time. As some of you have heard, I had to leave Arizona because I got a bad reputation because I was making out with so many girls in the nightclub.

19:15 And that had a second consequence as well. Buyer's remorse. Girls who will make out with dudes in nightclubs oftentimes, not oftentimes, but probably half the time won't text them back because they feel embarrassed. They feel kind of like a slut. It's a moment of shame for them, for some of them, and they won't text you back. So while I'll tease girls and I'll talk about it, the best part is I don't do it. I don't act on it. I don't make out with them. I don't give them that sexual release that I build up during that first conversation.

19:45 Instead, all I do, take their phone number. Okay, now she's so wet, there's a snail trail going down her leg. She's literally finger blasting herself, knuckle dunking that shit on the way home, thinking about you. When you text back the next day at six, do you think she's going to be like, LOL, ha, ha, ha, and blow you out? Fuck to the no, man. She's going to be so fast on it. You're going to get a text back before your shit even finishes sending. You're going to be like, what's up, Kelly?

20:10 It's Mark. Hey, how are you? You'd be like, whoa, how did you reply to my text before I even sent it? How'd you even pull that off? You stalker, Texas Ranger. You wouldn't say that to her. I'm just kidding around, but that's how into it chicks are going to get when you deploy these pillars. The fourth pillar of attraction, as we're wrapping up here, is what, boys? That's right, qualifying, making her sell herself to you. This is really important because you need to show her that you actually care about her as a person.

20:39 You're interested in more than just her looks. So the best question you can ask is something like, what would your best friend say is the coolest thing about you? This not only makes her sell herself to you, but it also makes her justify to herself why you like her. If you go into a conversation and you're doing all the talking, you're providing all the content, the gambits, all the attraction building techniques that I teach, and she doesn't say two words, even if you get her phone number, even if she's super attracted to you, she's going to be like, why does this guy like me?

21:08 I hardly said two words to the dude. He just wants my sex. He wants to finger blast me, knuckle dunk it. I'm out of here. I'm not going to text him back. Okay, so you have to fiend interest in her, even if you're not that interested, although you should be, about what she's like, what she's done, what her beliefs are. Also, what would your best friend say is the coolest thing about you? She then sells herself to you. And if you could get a girl to sell herself to you, massive for attraction.

21:34 You guys never want to sell yourself to a woman, but you always want her to sell herself to you, if you can do that, it's over, dog. Like, you have no idea. These chicks are going to be following you out of the club, trying to go home with you that night. And an even more powerful technique is like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Like, we just met. Let's just go our separate ways. I'll text you. Okay? Relax. I'm going to text you. You promise? You promise you're going to text me?

21:59 Definitely going to text you, maybe. Definitely, maybe I'll text you, which is something I always say. Fuck with them a little bit. Bro, she's going home, knuckle-dunking, dog. Knuckle-dunking.com to your image in her head. How would you like that to happen with a girl who looks like the last girl that you masturbated to on Pornhub.com with your frequent masturbator platinum card, fucking rubbing, tugging it out, getting it in, and you're like, oh, I wish I could have a girl like that. If you just take a conscious effort into it, work on the shit in your head, deploy the four pillars of attraction, you will get that chick.

22:36 That last chick who you baited to on the porn sites could be in your bed if you just get this shit corrected. Four pillars of attraction are frame control, value, sexual tension, qualifying, all of which I've done some semblance of episodes on this podcast about, but all of which I teach in depth to the deepest level possible in my three-month coaching program, and that's the central facet of what I teach. Everything is based on the four pillars of attraction, and the entire backbone, the skeleton of everything that I teach is frame control.

23:11 And this is why guys get the results they do in my program is because we're very intelligent in how we teach it, but most importantly, it's all about what's inside your head. We do the NLP remapping so you can believe you're that dude, so you behave like that dude. When you behave like that dude, and a girl tests your frame by questioning you, why don't you have a girlfriend? You're not like, oh, well, it's because I'm really picky, and I just haven't found the right girl in that.

23:35 No, dude, you flip it on her. Real question is, why don't you have a boyfriend? It's probably because you're a bad kisser, huh? And you go into that whole gambit. So there's ways, boys, to deal with women that once you understand it, your results explode. What I always say to my guys is this. I'm always like, look, when you come into the program, there's going to be a few weeks of studying up, and then whenever it happens for you, I don't know, it depends on you, but it's going to happen, a fucking pussy avalanche.

24:00 And I hate to be crude. I hate to degrade women. That's not my point here. Just trying to get inside your head that it's feast or famine. You either get zero or very little, or you get a motherfucking tidal wave of chicks, and that happens to all my guys. I'm like, bro, prepare yourself, man. Those lonely nights in bed are about to be over. You're going to have so many different hair colors in your bed. You're going to be lint rolling it. You're going to look at the lint roller.

24:24 There's a black one. There's an orange one. There's a blonde one. There's a brown one. There's a pink one. There's a blue one. How many goddamn different hair colors could there be? And your lint roller is going to look like a goddamn rainbow wig when you get that shit done out of your bed. That's how powerful this is. So the four pillars, boys, keep that in mind when you're in your conversations. If you fail to get this in, that's probably the reason you're not getting texts back.

24:48 You're not getting a lot of attraction. You're not getting phone numbers. You're not getting dates. There's not enough attraction. Attraction solves everything when it comes to women. So gentlemen, I do appreciate you listening. Obviously, I have a three-month coaching program. And obviously, it's the fast track to get you that kind of result in the quickest, easiest way possible where, yes, girls are going to be begging for your phone number. Click the link in the description below. Fill in the quick application. You and I are going to talk a little bit.

25:14 Then you're going to get on a call with my partner, my wingman, the fucking champion, Victor Lynch, to see if we can get you those same results. I want girls begging for your number, man. That's my goal. And I get it for my dudes. When they show up, when they do the work, when they step into their fucking masculine energy. And just like I said in the beginning of this episode, harden the fuck up. You got problems. Things aren't going for you. Suck it the fuck up, bro.

25:37 The time has come, man. I'm sick of this pussy bullshit tiptoeing around people's feelings. The way to get good with girls is to step into your masculine energy, face your motherfucking fears, and believe in yourself and know that you can do it. And with my help, the rest of the brotherhood army behind you pushing you forward, your success is inevitable. So join us, man. Stop putting it off. Stop procrastinating. All that shit is female behavior. We're done with that shit. Let's get you into the program.

26:02 Let's get you more sex than you're going to know what to do with. That's what I know you want, and that's what you deserve. So come join us. Click the link in the description below. Gentlemen, I draw a podcast on Mondays and Thursdays, so please stay tuned for the next one, and I will see you in the next episode. I'll see you in the next episode.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.