The "Second Mind" of Women and How to Access it For BIGTIME ATTRACTION

0:00 Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, gentlemen? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP. Happy Thursday. I hope this week has been treating you well. And today, we're going to talk about the second mind of women and how to access it for attraction. That basically means that women don't always do things that are completely logical, both to us and to themselves.

0:35 And they often seem to have a second mind, some other mind that's controlling their behavior, controlling their decisions. And half the time, you're like, what in the actual fuck is this chick thinking? Why did she just do that? Why did she tell me that she absolutely hates assholes? She would never date XYZ dude. And then she left the nightclub with a guy who was exactly that, a complete douche canoe who would never treat her the way I would and who doesn't respect her. And he's not a good guy.

1:03 He's not friendly. He would never help her in a bind, but I would. But yet she leaves with him because he flipped all her attraction hot switches. And you didn't, bro, amigo. You fucked up, bro. But I'm going to teach you in this podcast how not to screw up moving forward and how women actually have a second mind. And I came upon this because it's been a theme lately in the coaching calls with my clients. We talk a lot about how to access women's emotions. And it could be said that women's emotions are the actual second mind, the mind behind the mind that controls their actions.

1:36 Because look, even as men, we are human beings. And human beings will oftentimes act on emotion and then rationalize it after. In fact, almost every decision you make, unless you're really, really logical, is made on emotions. And then you rationalize it after, such as that car that you bought that perhaps you couldn't afford. You bought it anyway because you were emotionally attached to it. You wanted to flex up a little bit. You wanted to feel that blood get pulled to the back of your brain as you smash down on the accelerator.

2:11 And I hear you, man. Emotions really dictate lots of our actions. But then we rationalize it after. And we're like, well, I can afford it because X, Y, Z. And I should have done this because of this reason and that reason. But you act on emotions. And women particularly act on their emotions. I mean, really, really act on their emotions. And that's what I call the second mind. So anytime you're dealing with women, you have to understand that if you're not flipping emotional hot switches, then you're not getting her attracted.

2:38 In fact, emotion equals attraction in many different ways, except for, of course, negative emotion like anger, hatred, and things like that. But even some negative emotions equal attraction. And this too is why that asshole yanked that girl right off of you who friendzoned you because you were Mr. Nice Guy, friendzoned you because you had boring conversations with her and friendzoned you because you thought you could logically convince her with your resume to be with you. And then homeboy comes along, flips all these emotional hot switches, which I'm going to teach you how to do, both in this episode as well as other episodes.

3:16 And then he yanked her right off of you. So again, the second mind is emotions. We have to get into the motions. If you're not getting into her emotions, you're not getting attraction. So the first point is to forgive women who have done things that seemed completely irrational to you because they were just acting on their emotions. Like if a girl did something that makes absolutely no sense to you, look at it from this new perspective. Look at it from her second mind. That is basically her emotions.

3:42 And then you'll see exactly why she did it. And this often happens, like the example I gave of a girl going for a dude that just isn't right for her, a girl constantly getting with guys who she says she would never get with or repeating the same mistake over and over again because of her emotions. And by the way, if you're attracted to the same kind of woman who is a dumpster fire and a complete train wreck and she always fucks you over and you wonder why you get into these dysfunctional relationships, it's oftentimes because your mom and even sometimes your dad had a similar dysfunction and you're unconsciously trying to fix that girl by getting together with her.

4:22 And this is felt as extreme attraction inside your dysfunctional brain, your emotional brain, your second brain. And you get with this woman and you try to fix her, but alas, it always ends in catastrophe. And then you just repeat the shit over and over again, which will never get fixed until you actually get intrusive by working on yourself, by switching your programs, by dealing with your traumas. So with women, they go into an interaction asking themselves, how does this make me feel? And they don't even ask it with their first mind, that logical mind.

4:59 They're asking it with their second mind. And we could call it the mind behind the mind where she wants to know how you make her feel. And that starts from the very moment you say anything or even better, the very moment you two walk in the same room together, or are within 25 feet on the street together. And this is why I always say to you guys, go up to these girls with good energy. Because the first thing she's asking, once again, is how does this make me feel?

5:23 Remember, feelings are emotions and emotions are attraction. So the second mind, the mind behind the mind is assessing and putting feelers out for how you make her feel. And as I said in that previous episode about bringing good energy, sometimes you'll see somebody like at a gas station, and they'll just have a really bad vibe about them and you want nothing to do with them. It's the same thing with women, their second mind is assessing what kind of energy is this guy putting out. So before you go up, as I said in that other episode, you should feel slightly better than she feels.

5:58 And if you need a lesson on how to do that, just listen to that episode. Let's see what it was called. It was episode 375, how to stop feeling like you're bothering girls when you approach them. I talk all about energy giving, okay? So her second mind is, how's this dude making me feel? That's literally the only thing she's asking. If he makes me feel good, I want to continue this conversation. If he makes me feel bad, I'm going to say I have a boyfriend, or I'm going to give him a number and I'm not going to text back.

6:24 I'm going to make an excuse to get the hell out of here. Now, after that, it's your job as the man to create a conversation that makes her feel good. And feel good isn't even complete. It's also feel intrigued, feel curious, feel slightly frustrated, feel entertained, feel high, feel uncertain. All these emotions are what I call the emotional rollercoaster that we are focusing on to get her attracted to us. If you go into a conversation, talk about religion, politics, your freaking boring-ass job, or why you think the stock market is going to crash in two weeks because of all this data that you've been studying at work, no attraction.

7:08 You go into a conversation instead and tell stories, make her laugh, get into her emotions by asking her how certain things make her feel, or better yet, explaining to her why it makes her feel good to do XYZ. That shit gets attraction. So we're always focusing on that second mind, which is the emotional mind, by being entertaining, but not going into clown mode, just talking about shit that's entertaining to her, such as a simple story. For example, I'll often tell a story that I've told literally like 20,000 times a really quick story that makes girls laugh about how there was a fight outside between two girls.

7:46 One girl had her shirt like pulled down, a boob came out, and it was like a National Geographic boob, and she was slapping herself in her own face with the boob. Okay, so that's a really quick example of a quick story that I'll tell that will make the girls laugh. When you make them laugh, you're pumping the emotion, you're getting into the second mind, and she is going to start getting attracted to you. And if you do that enough, women will make decisions based on the second mind that are completely irrational, such as leaving with that asshole and blowing you out, even though you've helped her move, you freaking wrote her essay for her, you waxed her car, gave her flowers, wrote her poems, and even freaking gave her a bikini wax because you're a goddamn floor mat.

8:28 And believe me, I've been there before too. So if you're that dude, I completely understand. But what you did is you showed her that she's controlling the frame, you're the one who is in the supplicatory mode, you're the one following her, and that doesn't get attraction. You're not flipping the hot switches in her second mind, which is the emotional mind. And all the things that are based on attraction, as I talk about ad nauseum in this podcast, is survivability. Can this dude have high survivability? Can he make me feel good?

8:57 Can he make me feel protected? Can he lead me to where I want to be led? Can he make me feel, and you guys can all relate to this, just like your best friend in high school made you feel when he was a little bit older, he had a car and you guys used to go out on the town listening to music, eating some Arby's or Jack in the Box or whatever. He's telling you stories about girls, that same feeling of him tucking you under his wing and showing him a good time.

9:21 That's the shit that accesses the second mind of women. And then they're going to do stuff that will blow your mind. I have had Christian girls who said they would never have sex before marriage, want to have sex with both me and my friends because we just flip those attraction hot switches. Now, fortunately, I'm a pretty moral fella, so I didn't do it. But it's just to show you that you can take the most precious angel, best chick in the world who would never do anything.

9:51 And she will go and have butt sex with the fucking complete asshole that she just met that same night if he can flip all those attraction hot switches. And this too is why I always warn you guys to be very careful with these superpowers that you're getting because it's very easy to manipulate women. And I dare say I've done it many times myself because I understood the second mind concept. You will never rationalize a woman into bed, bro. Like you printing out your resume, showing up in a three-piece noose, taking her to a five-star dinner and trying to convince her what a great guy you are by rattling off all the stats of how much money you make, how good you are at cunnilingus because your technique is so dialed in, how clutch you'll be in a home invasion scenario if you and her were to get married, and what a great father you'd be to her children because of all these great things you have.

10:43 See, you don't ever explain yourself to a woman. You demonstrate yourself to a woman. So that answers the question, well, Mark, you say that women are attracted to survivability. Shouldn't I just tell her I have high survivability? You can't tell her. You have to show her. And the way you show her is through frame control, being funny, not giving a shit what happens, qualifying her. Qualifying her is a major hot switch in the second mind of women because she's selling herself to you. Whenever you sell yourself to somebody, you're always convincing yourself that you want something really badly.

11:17 So for example, if I were hiring you to come be my assistant, just for example, and I had you sell yourself to me, you would want to be my assistant even more simply because I'm having you sell yourself to me. So when we ask women questions like, so what's good about you beyond your looks? What would your best friend say is the coolest thing about you? It's accessing the mind behind the mind where it's cognitive dissonance. She has to convince herself that she likes you more than she may actually like you in order to justify why she's selling herself to you.

11:49 And again, this is how guys can yank a girl out of a nightclub that is like Mrs. Goody Two-Shoes, would never sleep with the dude on the first night. And I've had so many girls tell me this. And guys, listen to this because I know a lot of you listening are going to be nodding your head. How many of you have heard, I never do this. I've never done this before. I can't believe this. I've never, ever, ever done this. I have heard that more times than I can count.

12:13 And I'm sure a lot of you have too. This is because the second mind, you were able to flip all those attraction hot switches, get past her rational mind of, I never do this because that's the rational mind speaking. And then she does it. And that's why I said that Mrs. Angel Pants over there would have filthy monkey butt sex with some dude if you were convincing enough. And I want to set the record straight too. It's not just women. While the second mind of women is more powerful than the second mind of men, simply because masculinity is highly logical, where femininity is highly emotional, guys are the same way.

12:50 Guys are the same fucking way. And it's the same example of that Camaro you bought with the freaking V8 in it that sounds so amazing, even though gas right now is astronomically high. That was an emotional decision. And hey, that's okay. That's what we do as human beings. But I really want you guys to understand that if you go into a conversation with a girl and it's getting logical and you guys are exchanging facts, that shit ain't going to get attraction. You have to ask questions like, how does that make you feel?

13:17 What's your favorite thing about XYZ? What would you do if you were able to do anything without any chance of failure? What would you do right now if somebody gave you $90 million? If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go and why? Oh, really? You'd go there? How would that feel? Is that the coolest thing ever? Why do you love to dance? She's like, I don't know. I just love it. And then you tell her it's because you're in the present moment. You're not thinking.

13:44 You're not stressing about the future. You're not worrying about the past. You're just present with that music. You can feel it going through you. You can feel your body moving. It just feels completely at peace because of the cessation of thought. Have you ever thought of that before? And you see the way I've explained this to her where she's like, oh, yeah. And she's getting really into it emotionally. Boom. Attraction hot switches are flipped. So we're always trying to ask questions that get into her emotions.

14:13 Now, as all things, this can be wildly misinterpreted. And you guys could just be like, well, how did that make you feel? What was the best thing about that? Did it make you feel flowery? Or did it make you feel like an ice cream cone? And you turn into a little pussy. You got to be calibrated with this, but always leading the conversation into emotions if you can. And even just asking her, what was the best day of your life? Do you think asking her, what was the best day of your life, is a better question than, what did you do yesterday at work?

14:44 Of course it is. Because asking her what the best day of her life is, is getting her into her emotions. Now, if you ask, what was it about yesterday's day at work that was like the highlight of your day, that would be a good question. Okay, so we're always trying to lead her into things that make her feel something and make her feel good, preferably, but also curious. For example, I'll say to girls, you know what's cool about you? And she'll be like, what? And I'll be like, ah, never mind.

15:11 Or, hey, I just noticed something about you. You do this one thing that's so cute, but I don't want to tell you what it is because then you'll stop doing it. See that? That creates curiosity. She's wondering what it is. Now she's kind of chasing you and she's like, what? And you're like, don't worry about it. I don't want to tell you. You're going to stop doing it. She's like, no, I won't. She's like hitting you on the arm. See how this spikes emotions, the emotion of curiosity, seeking, trying to get from you, rather than the logical, what was your 2018 tax numbers?

15:40 And did you report them correctly to the IRS? Because if you didn't, I shall report you, which so many guys do, right? And listen, I work with a lot of engineers. I work with a lot of doctors, a lot of guys who are like in IT and computers. And that's my jam, dude. Those are my boys. But I have to teach them to like get out of this logical shit. If you're exchanging information with the woman, you're fucked, bro. Like no attraction. But if you get into that second mind, and I always want you guys to really think about this, am I accessing the second mind, the emotional mind?

16:11 If you can get into that, she'll do anything. She really will. And guys will too. And this is how like cult leaders get a bunch of freaking sea donkeys to follow them and commit suicide when Haley's comment flies by. It's all emotions. That guy is a master manipulator by giving people hope, by giving people an answer to their existential anxiety as to why are we here. To giving people the excitement of the future of heaven with an entire community of like thinkers. So people who can flip these emotional triggers in other people's heads, those are the best people when it comes to persuasion.

16:48 All really good salespeople know that you have to ask on a high note. You have to get the person highly emotional and even negatively emotional where if you don't come get the solution, your life is going to be horrible. In fact, all marketers know that the best way to write copy is to focus on the pain. To focus on the pain of not being able to get girls, not making a lot of money, not being able to travel whenever you want. And how bad does it suck that you have to wake up every morning and go to a nine to five job?

17:21 So it's all marketing. It's all sales. And this is why a lot of guys are just fundamentally bad with women because they don't think that way. And I used to not think that way either until I had this very shift that I'm trying to give to you that there's a second mind and you have to tap into the emotions. And you can memorize, for you guys who are really logical, you can memorize route questions like the 10 that I just listed for you, such as if you could have a billboard on the side of the highway, what would it say on it?

17:49 If you could feel any emotion literally anytime you wanted to, what emotion would that be and why? And then she starts talking about the emotion. Then she starts feeling the emotion and you're getting the attraction. So for you dudes who are highly logical, you can learn like step-by-step stuff. And I certainly teach that in my coaching as well as this podcast. But really just knowing, dude, this conversation is way too logical. This isn't working. And knowing why that never leads to attraction, hopefully a few of you kind of had a wake-up moment, an aha moment, as I like to call it by listening to this.

18:23 And now you're going to kind of change your angle when you go to speak to girls. Focus on the emotions. That's the second mind of women. And women will always act on their second mind. And the first mind is only there to rationalize what they did. Do that and your success with women will go up exponentially. Gentlemen, I do appreciate you listening. I draw a podcast on Mondays and Thursdays. So please stay tuned for the next one. And I will see you in the next episode.

18:49 So. And I will see you in the next episode.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.