The Secret to Handling Girls: "THE ULTIMATE PRINCIPLE"

0:00 Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up guys, thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP, I really do appreciate it and today I got a really cool one for you. We're going to go through a bunch of if-then scenarios with girls and tell you how to behave and the right things to do and the common situations, the common things that girls are going to do to you.

0:37 And what I want to give you today is what I call the ultimate principle and this is basically a principle that you're going to use to guide your interactions with girls moving forward. And this is one of the best principles I've ever thought of for how to dictate how you're going to act with women when they're going to inevitably behave in certain ways that are going to piss in your river. So when they do this, you're going to know exactly how to act, what to do, you're going to filter it through this principle, and you're going to know the perfect thing to do in every single possible situation, hopefully.

1:11 Before I jump into that, I want to ask you guys once again to leave me a review after you've heard this podcast if you believe that the ultimate principle is indeed that ultimate if it makes the cut. Those reviews really do help me, so if you feel like I've helped you and you want to reciprocate that a little bit, if you want to give back to me, a review with a little bit of text behind it is the absolute best thing you can do for me.

1:34 After you do that, feel free to email me at coachmarksing at gmail.com, and I will reply back with a bunch of programs, including The Conversation Sniper, 101 Deadly One-Liners for Building Attraction, Guide to the Female Orgasm, three texts to build massive attraction in women, as well as a couple videos. I've been getting awesome reviews from you guys. I love getting them and really, really does help me. It helps me rank. So if you want to help a dude out, that's the absolute best way to do it.

2:03 I'd really appreciate it. All right, let's go ahead and jump into it. So what is this ultimate principle that I keep talking about? Well, here it is. Whenever you're dealing with a woman, you need to ask yourself, how would I behave if I were dating five girls? That's it. How would I behave in this situation if I was dating five girls? Okay, she flakes on you. What would I do? She invites you to do something you don't want to do. What do you do? She calls you at 12 a.m.

2:32 and says, hey, can you come pick me up? I'm stuck at the bar. What do you do? You're dating five girls. When you behave this way, surprisingly, your actions become perfect. And when I say perfect, I mean perfect in the way that gets girls attracted to you. So there's a couple fundamental principles of an attractive man that come through this filter of what would I do if I were dating five girls? What would I do if I was having sex with five girls? Or if you're more comfortable, what would I do if I was talking to five girls?

3:03 Well, the first principle is you don't care what happens, right? You got five chicks. So it's like no big deal. Whatever happens, happens. The second principle is you're not thirsty. You're not needy. You're not trying to get anything from this girl. Why? Because you're satiated. Your penis looks like a damn burn victim because it's been getting so much action, man. It's hiding in the corner of your underwear. It's like, please don't make me go back in. Please, sir. Can I please get a rest? Give me some bench time.

3:29 That's the way you need to think about it. Like, literally, when you're dating five different girls and having sex with all kinds of girls, your dick is hurting. When your dick hurts, are you really going to be thirsty for more sex? No. You're going to act in a way that you're supposed to act, which is as an attractive man. Thirdly, you're not going to try to pull her into an outcome that you hope will manifest, which is such a big problem with guys. They try to pull girls into what they hope will happen.

3:56 They talk about the future too soon. They talk about becoming boyfriend and girlfriend. They talk about future trips, future possibilities. You do not want to do that. Why don't you want to do that? Because it's unattractive. It's thirsty. Now, if you use the filter, what would I do if I was having sex with five girls? Would you really go up to girl number six and be like, oh, I can imagine us living together later and we'll get married and we'll probably move to a different state together and it's going to be fantastic?

4:22 You never do that. As I've said in previous podcasts, you want the woman to kind of be the barometer for how fast you push the relationship along. And how do you do that? You just wait for her to bring it up. When she starts talking about future shit and if you're in that kind of mind space with her and you want to go along with that, then you can talk about future stuff. But until she does, dude, do not push it because it looks needy, it looks thirsty, it looks like you don't have options.

4:50 Now, when you behave this way, when you filter everything through the five girl concept, when you look at your bracelet and it says, what would I do if I was having sex with five girls? You guys ever see those bracelets? Like, what would Jesus do? Just be like, what would the player version of myself do in this situation? When you filter it through that, it makes it look like you have pre-selection. So pre-selection means that you already have girls in your life and girls are attracted to guys who already have girls in their life.

5:19 Quick explanation, it's because it's a cognitive shortcut. Just like you're sitting at a stoplight and you're looking down at your cell phone texting and then the light turns green and everybody starts going, you go too. You just assume what everybody else around you is doing is correct, so you do it too. It's a cognitive shortcut. Well, it happens in cognitive behavioral psychology as well as that women are attracted to men who already have women in his life because women can trust in the opinion of other women because women are very intuitive.

5:50 They understand these things. So they say, well, if these girls approve of him, then I'll approve of him too. Now, when you use the filter, what would I do if I was having sex with five girls? You act in ways where you are basically having sex with five girls, right? So she flakes on you. What do you do? She tests you. What do you do? She disrespects you. What do you do? She's ho-hum over texting. What do you do? Suddenly, the answers become obvious, don't they?

6:17 So before, you would be thirsty. You would be chasing girls. You would be confused. You would be having one-nitis where you like focus on one girl. You need to scrap that shit. You need to think to yourself, how would I behave if I was dating tons of girls? And furthermore, you need to fill the top of your pipeline, which by the way is a big part of my coaching, is one of the biggest things we do is we figure out how to fill the top of your pipeline with tons of girls so that the good ones come out the bottom and in addition to that, you're not thirsty.

6:48 We have to get rid of that stank, that armpit stank that smells like a sumo wrestler took a crap on a burning tire. We got to get rid of that, man. We got to get you clean so that there's no neediness whatsoever. Neediness is probably the biggest way to turn off girls. There's many ways, but neediness is way up there. So once again, I'm dating five girls. Am I needy? Fuck no. She flakes on me, whatever, I don't even care. Okay, so let's go ahead and do these if-then scenarios.

7:20 She flakes on you, what do you do? I've said this before in a previous podcast, so do you have the answer? You better have the answer, you better be listening to my stuff. She flakes on you, you text back, okay. Two letters, okay, whatever. Now she's sitting there thinking, is he mad, does he not care? The real thing is, is you don't care. Now that's a big principle of this, okay? Is that you don't care what happens. You're not outcome dependent. You don't get angry. You don't get hurt and get emotional.

7:52 See, as a strong alpha male, when you have your inner shit together, nothing she can do can get you off what I call your inner balance point. This is the point within you that is in balance. So that no matter what happens in the outside world, it doesn't affect you because you have a deep treasure trove of really peace inside your heart. It's like a deep lake. Yeah, there can be some turbulence on the surface, but the depth of your lake is calm. It's unmovable. So if there's some like turbulence on the surface where she's messing with you, disrespecting you, flaking on you, you're like, ah, whatever, no big deal.

8:29 You're not to be fucked with and you're not going to stand for that kind of behavior, but your reaction is, hey, whatever. I went and saw another girl. And just so you know, like if you do that again, I'm afraid we're going to have to part ways. So pull your shit together because I don't stand for that kind of thing. You can be disagreeable. You can not stand for things and still not be emotionally negative about it. That's the big thing is that yes, as an unapologetic man, you are not to be fucked with.

8:58 And I want you guys to remember that you are not to be fucked with, but you never get emotional about it. You never get angry. You never lash out at her, even in your body language. Today, I was talking to this girl. I opened a girl and she was ho-hum about me. So I asked her a question. It was about like masks or whatever. Hey, do we still have to wear masks in this shop? I was at Shields. It's like an outdoor shop. Hey, do we have to still wear masks?

9:22 She's like, yeah, sometimes you do. Sometimes you don't. I think today you don't. And I was like, yeah, it changes like every three days, right? It's like, yes, wear a mask. Nah, it's okay. You don't have to. Yes, wear a mask. And she's like, yeah. And she wasn't really into it. So I just turned and walked away. Like, goodbye. See you. If you're not going to interact with me, if you're not going to recognize the value that I bring as a champion into the conversation, then it's like, peace.

9:45 I don't want anything to do with you. That's how you'd behave if you were dating five girls. If you behaved where you were thirsty, you'd like try harder and try to like pull her in. And consequently, I saw her later and she was kind of looking at me. And I was like, yeah, of course, because when you're willing to drop something and walk away from it, that gets attraction. So once again, when they're not acting the way you want them to, this is a big principle.

10:11 Ask yourself, what would I do if I was having sex with five girls? I'd be like, see ya. I'm out of here. You're fucking dork. Goodbye. And then that gets them more attracted. Okay. She tests you. She says some mean shit to you. Well, if you've listened to any of my frame control episodes, you turn it around on her, right? My big statement that I love more than anything. And if you don't have this tattooed on your forehead or at least tattooed on your ass, then you and I should have a little talk because this is the most powerful four words ever, it is the real question is.

10:46 So she tests you. She says, why don't you have a girlfriend? The real question is, why don't you have a boyfriend? It's probably because you're a bad kisser, huh? Okay. You flip it on her. Now that goes into what we're talking about. How would I behave if I was having sex with five girls? I'd flip shit on her. I wouldn't be trying to build rapport. I would be completely comfortable to break rapport. Now break rapport means not trying to build commonalities, not trying to build a friendship.

11:13 It's breaking it in a playful way. Once again, guys, balance here. I'm not teaching you how to become an asshole. I'm teaching you how to show her you don't care, but at the same time, give charisma. It's that very cool balance. It's that cool recipe where you have like a hot center and a cold outside, right? It's like one of those desserts that only the master chefs can make. That's exactly what you want to have with women. And once again, this filter, I'm talking to five girls, is going to give you that perfect recipe.

11:44 If you remember not to lash out at her, not to let negative energy come into it while at the same time showing her you're not to be fucked with. It's a really cool balance. And once you get it, pussy on tap, my friend, pussy on tap. Okay. She disrespects you. Once again, you don't stand for that kind of behavior. You're dating five girls. See ya. I don't stand for that. She's ho-hum over texting. You pull away. You don't respond. You freaking don't text her anymore. You nix her.

12:15 Surprisingly, she'll come back. Pulling away, not responding, not being there when she wants you to drives women crazy and it ramps up attraction fast. All right. The next example is kind of interesting. And this came up because I was talking about this today with a client. You can tell my voice is kind of jacked. I had a bunch of coaching calls, but he said that this girl is trying to get him to come into her domain, right? So they've been dating a couple of dates. Her family's coming in from out of town and they're going to go sightseeing.

12:46 And she's like, hey, you should come. And I said, do you think you should go? And he's like, um, I don't think so. I was like, you're right. You shouldn't go because in the beginning, you don't want to go into her domain where she has control. You don't want to put yourself in what I call the beta position where you're like the follower. You're in the beta cuck position. You're not really leading it. You don't want to do that. Now, this isn't some misogynistic power trip.

13:13 This is just what gets attraction is you being the alpha. So initially, I always try to put myself in positions where I'm leading. I had another client today. He wants to eventually go to Russia. What is up, Nick, my dude? I fucking love Nick, man. Anyway, he wants to go to Russia. He likes those Russian chicks. And I got to be honest with you. I'm on the same page, my dude. Love those skinny, thin, sexy Russian girls. Anyway, he wants to go to Russia. And I asked him, you could speak a little bit of Russian, but should you or should you make them try to speak English?

13:44 Now, you guys should know the answer. Make them try to speak English. Why? Because it puts you in the alpha role. She's trying to speak English to you. So she's kind of in the beta role because she's not as good at the language as you are. I made this classic mistake when I lived in Japan. I was trying to speak Japanese to a lot of these girls. Big mistake. A lot of girls who are in Japan, little side note here, Asian chicks, like this works for Japan, China, South Korea, all those countries.

14:11 Either they're like super into Gaijin is what they call like a foreigner dudes, or they're like, hell no about them. Well, if they're super into foreigner dudes, they're trying to learn English. So when you make them talk English, talk English, I need to work on my English. Apparently when you make them speak English, it puts you in the alpha position and they're trying to kind of like earn your respect by speaking English to you. See how that works? So the general principle for this is don't go into her domain until you've been dating for a while.

14:44 And the good example of this is one time I was dating a chick who was a DJ and early on she invited me to come see one of her sets. And I said, you know what? I'm tied up that night, but maybe some other time. Now I did that because what am I going to be some jackass standing in the crowd looking up at her and she's in the power position? No. And I'm not doing that because like, I don't want to see her spin. I'm doing it because it's going to kill her attraction.

15:07 I almost like did it for her as a favor. Now, eventually, obviously, if we're dating down the road, I'll go into her domain and I'll let her flex up a little bit and I'll be like, yeah, that's fucking cool. So there needs to be that balance there. All right. Another example that happens a lot to guys is when you're talking to a girl at a bar or a nightclub and you've been talking to her for like, you know, a couple minutes, whatever, and she invites you to come over to see her friends, to meet her friends.

15:35 Hey, I got to get back to my friends. Do you want to come? What do you say? You say, no, no, that's cool. I'm going to get back to my friends too. Maybe I'll catch up with you later. Now, going back to the previous example, you don't want to go into her domain. Preferably, you want to get her into your domain. So being it that you're willing to let her go, once again, using the filter of what would I do if I was dating five girls, I'd let her go.

16:00 When you let her go, it builds a lot of attraction because she's like, okay, he's not thirsty. And the good thing about bars and nightclubs is you can circle around and open her again later. Even if she's with her friends, if you let her go 10 minutes ago, and then you circle around and go open her again, you're going to have a much better chance of getting her attracted because 10 minutes ago, you showed her that you're willing to let her go. I'm telling you, the willingness to let a girl go is like freaking superpower.

16:28 It really is. It works awesome with chicks. So really store that one in your memory bank for future situations to come. Okay. Another situation. She lives 30 minutes away. You meet her on the dating apps and you guys are going to hang out. What do you do? What I suggest you do is at least meet her halfway. Better yet, have her extend the effort to come to your area. And then you guys hang out in your area. Why is that? Is because as I've discussed already as well, you want girls to work for you because when they work for you, it's called cognitive dissonance.

17:05 They value more you and they get more attracted to you. So if you have to go drive to a girl's area, like she's really not budging. She doesn't want to do it. I strongly suggest you say that you're going over there anyway. Like, Hey, my buddy lives over there. I got to pick up some motorcycle parts from him. Yeah, cool. I'll be there on Thursday. Thursday works for you. Cool. Let's do it over in your area. That's the way I suggest handling that. All right. I had another client and he agreed to go kayaking with a girl in like a couple of weeks, right?

17:37 She's busy right now doing finals, whatever her stupid excuse was. Hey, let's go kayaking when you're done with your busy time. And he's like, Hey, so I took a picture of the two kayaks on my car and I was going to send it to her and say, whenever you're ready, dot, dot, dot. And I said, Whoa, do not send that. Okay. Why? And you guys should know the answer. Now, would you do that if you were dating five girls? No, you're not going to say, Hey, whenever you're ready, it puts her like in the power position.

18:04 It means you're waiting around. You're the beta cuck sitting there waiting for her. No, no, no. A better way to do it is to send her the picture and say, Hey, I'm going kayaking with my buddy. Maybe sometime you and I can go to, if you're going to do it at all. That's what I'd suggest doing. Another example is she tries to always hang out with you and her friends. Oh, I hate that shit. Don't you hate that shit when they do that? She's like, Hey, you know, do you want to come out with me and my friends?

18:31 Like you guys are planning to hang out. She's always trying to bring her friends around. Well, remember the episode where I talked about three signs of girls using you. That's exactly this is she doesn't want to be alone with you one-on-one. And I've had this happen to me. And I said, you know what? I'm sure your friends are cool. And eventually if things work out with us, I'd be down to meet them. But right now I'm trying to get to know you. And I kind of feel like I don't really get the opportunity to know you really well when there's other people around.

18:58 So I prefer to hang out one-on-one. If that's a deal breaker for you, I totally understand. Just let me know. And that's oftentimes what I would do with girls is I would just be like, I'd stand my ground, tell them how I want things and then be like, totally okay to leave them. If it's a deal breaker, I would always say, Hey, if that's a deal breaker, if that's a deal breaker for you, that's cool, just let me know. Which basically means, chick, I'll drop you like a bad habit.

19:24 And that's really the dynamic you want to have in this whole lesson here is that you would, you're just willing to fucking drop a girl like a bad habit because you're dating five other girls. Now you might be saying, yeah, Mark, but this one girl, this, this one fine girl, perfect ass, perfect tits. It's my, so my type, my dream girl, the one girl that's giving me attention, bro. I don't care. You have to behave like this. Even more importantly to behave like this. If you only have one girl in the bucket, because if you think that you need to change your game and you're going to get yourself all emotionally fucked up to change your game, because this girl is different.

20:00 No, she's different. No, she's, she's not like those other girls. Bullshit. Bro, I'm telling you, if you have one itis and you're focusing on one girl as so many of you guys do, I know you're out there, bro. I know you're listening. You're like, oh, this one girl. No, she's different, bro. I'm telling you, she's not, she's not different. And you're going to get blown out so fast. Your pants are going to fly off when the concussion hits. If you do that needy shit that you want to do.

20:27 Okay. So the next time you're going to interact with her, the next time you're going to deal with the situation with her, you have to ask yourself, how would I behave if I was dating five girls and do it. Grab your fucking balls and do the right move. And I guarantee you, it's going to work better than if you rationalize yourself into some emotionally driven decision that's going to screw you over yet again, because I know all you dudes just like me have been screwed over by our emotional mind.

20:57 Like, no, I don't, I don't think it's good. That's going to work, dude. I just think she's different here. Watch. Hey, hey, Sarah, I really like you. Would you be willing to hang out on Tuesday? Because, you know, I really miss you. Boom. She doesn't reply and your fucking pants are suddenly wrapped around the doorknob because they got shot off your fucking ass so fast when the concussion hit. Don't do it. Run it through the filter. Trust the filter. Look at your bracelet and ask yourself, what would Mark Singh do?

21:25 Mark would blow her out so fast. Her fucking dress would fly off and wrap around her mom's head when she's over at her house for Thanksgiving dinner. I don't know where that came from, but you get what I'm saying, man. You got to act this way, dude. It's really important. All right, guys. A couple other examples. You're dating a girl. She gets into your car. You pick her up on a date. She gets into your car and she's acting up. She's being a bitch. She's being moody.

21:49 She's giving you some shit. And girls will do this a lot. You know what I do? Bow, dude. Bust the U-turn. Take her home. And she'll be like, I've had this happen several times. She'll be like, what are you doing? I'm like, I'm chopping you off. Why? Because you're acting up. Honestly, like I'm here to have a good time with you and you're honestly being really negative. So let's go ahead and catch up some other time. And then she's like, oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm just, you know, I'm just moody.

22:14 I'm be like, okay. Do you think you can tighten up your program? Because I want to have a good time tonight. If you're not down for that, look, I totally get it. But I want to go ahead and spend the night alone if that's what you're doing. See, once again, do you see how like I'm showing her I'm not to be fucked with, but I'm not getting like emotional about it. I'm not like, dude, why are you being so negative? Like, what's going on? Are you mad at me?

22:36 No, it's like, boom, bust the U-turn, pull up to her car, do an e-brake slide and be like, get out. I'm going to go hang out with my friends. I want to have a good night tonight. Oh, I'm sorry. And then she's going to fucking say sorry. And then you're going to get your dick sucked. That's female psychology is just how it works. All right. She wants to go out with her friends. You know, you're, you're home alone. She's home alone. And she texts you and says, Hey, um, are you cool if I go out with my friends tonight?

23:01 Or I really want to go to this concert with my friends. Let her. Yeah, go beat it. Kick rocks with your head down. I don't give a shit. Go. Well, once again, not with anger, but that's the dynamic. It's like, yeah, I don't give a shit. Go. No jealousy. Go ahead. Fucking hang out with your guy friends. I don't give a shit. Look, you'll never prevent a girl from cheating on you by trying to control her. The only way you'll prevent her from cheating on you is ramping up attraction as fast as possible.

23:29 And the best way to ramp up attraction is to not be jealous. So if you're dating a girl who does that shit where she has tons of guy friends. I hate chicks like that, like super hot girl, tons of guy friends, tons of orbiters, loves the attention. One of those chicks. Fine. Beat it, dude. Kick rocks. I don't give a shit. Whatever. I'm dating five girls. It's like you're number three. Who cares? I'll fucking meet another girl tomorrow too. So if you quote unquote cheat on me, it's all good because there's another bus coming around.

24:01 There's plenty of fish in the sea. Whatever happens, happens. That works into that outcome independence that I keep talking about, which is so important. Final note on this, guys. I want to say that the dynamic of your relationship with the woman is set up in the first two weeks of dating her. Okay, so you're going to be dating a girl for two weeks. She's going to test you. It's her job to test you. To test your boundaries. To test your frame. To test the size of your cojones.

24:29 So you need to flex up and let her know, once again, you're not to be fucked with, without anger. If you buy into her little games, like she starts crying and complaining about this, that, and the third, and you're like, what the hell? And then you're like, oh baby, oh, I hear you. I'm so sorry. And then you become her wall to bitch at. Wow, that gets set up. Now for the rest of your fucking relationship, that's set up. So you need to set up this dynamic really early on.

24:57 What is the dynamic? I'm not to be fucked with. I will leave you at the drop of the hat. If you want to hang out, have a good time, be positive, and behave yourself, we're going to have a great fucking time together. Okay, I'm a man. I'm Batman. You're my little sidekick. I'm going to tuck you under my wing and show you the best time of your life. If you want that, cool. You're invited to come over. If you don't, that's cool too. Beat it. Kick rocks with your head down.

25:21 I can get a girl just like you every day of the week and twice on Sunday. It's no fucking big deal. That's the dynamic you want to have. All right, guys, I got to rest my voice now. Fucking too much coaching, man. Too much passion in the coaching room. If you want to get coaching with me, check out my website, dude. CoachMarkSingh at gmail.com. Yeah, that's my website. No. CoachMarkSingh.com. Check that out. And I wish you guys nothing but a happy 4th of July.

25:47 America has been great to you. I personally think it's one of the greatest countries in the world. And I'm going to celebrate, dude. Here in Colorado, we blow some shit up because we're close to Wyoming where the illegal fireworks are legal up in Wyoming. So we drive up there. And bro, it's a fucking war zone, dude. We have a big party and just blow everything up as much as possible. Cannot wait, dude. I love 4th of July. One of my favorite holidays. I love America. I think you should too.

26:15 I think it's a great country. Yeah, we have our problems. But ultimately, I'm a fucking patriot and I'm going to party like one on Saturday. And I hope you guys do the same. All right, that's it for me, boys. I'll see you in the next part. We'll see you next time.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.