What to Do When a Woman TESTS YOU By Being Annoying or Disrespectful on a Date

0:00 Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, guys? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP. I really do appreciate your patronage today. I know your time is very valuable. You could be spending it doing an infinity of different things, but you've chosen to spend your valuable time on me and I intend to reciprocate that by giving you the awesome information. And today we are going to talk about what to do when a woman is doing annoying things on a date, when she's checking her phone, when she's calling people, when, like my client Eric said, she's checking her dog cam every 10 minutes and seeing if her doggies are okay.

0:53 What the hell do you do about that? Now, when it comes to my clients, oftentimes I will record special podcasts designated specifically to them when they have great questions. So Eric, brother, this one is for you. We're going to talk about exactly why she did that, why women do these things, and also frame control is a big part of this. Something that ties into this is I just released a new video on my sales page on my website, and my sales page is basically the page that explains more about my free one-on-one consultation with you.

1:24 If you want to meet with me personally, jump on a Zoom call together, hang out as brothers and talk about what your issues are with women, what you want to accomplish. Well, I have a page on my website that explains how that whole program works. Basically, it's my three-month coaching program, and if you're interested in that, then you and I jump on the phone and we talk about whether or not you're a good fit. Well, in that program, I do group coaching calls. So it's me and a handful of brothers that get on this group coaching call every week, and we talk about how to attract women.

1:56 We talk about how to fix our brains, and I actually put a video of that group coaching call right there on my website. You can go to CoachMarkSing.com, click on coaching, scroll down a little bit, and you can see me live and in person. If you're curious what this idiot looks like, you can check that out, and honestly, it's a cool little five minutes of coaching. I teach some really cool concepts, most of which apply to exactly what we're going to talk about today. So if you're interested in seeing that video, click over.

2:23 If you want to get a free one-on-one consultation with me, talk to me about your issues, click over. And if you're interested in my three-month coaching program, click over. That entire page explains it, and I'll tell you what. My guys are absolutely getting phenomenal results, phenomenal results. As I've said before, I've never had a virgin, yes, even those who are over 40, join my program and not lose their virginity, not get laid. In other words, you're going to get laid when you join this program, yes, even if you are a virgin.

2:54 So if you're interested in that, click over. Even just to see the coaching example, it's actually pretty funny. Obviously, I chose what I felt was a good clip to show you guys, and it's actually a pretty funny clip. My boys participate. It's just a great example of how those coaching calls go down, the positivity, the brotherhood, and I love all those guys in there. And this one's for Eric. Like, brother, I hope this is going to help you understand why women do that and how to fix it moving forward.

3:21 Okay, so you're on a date with a girl, right? And we've all seen this. Girls will get on their cell phones. They'll be checking their texts. They'll be on Instagram. They'll maybe look at their doggy cam, which was something interesting I've kind of never heard before. And one of the reasons they do this, and you're not going to like this first reason, but we're just going to get it out of the way before we talk about frame control. But here's the reason that you're not going to like to hear, but it's usually true, probably 75% of the time.

3:48 It's your fault. It's your fault. What do I always say in this podcast? I always say that your job as the man is to lead women to where they want to be led. You want to give value. You want to leave them better from having met you. Well, dude, if you're on a date with her and she's bored enough to check her phone, that means that you're not bringing the conversational topics. You're not bringing the content to keep that date entertaining. Now, you may say to me, yeah, but bro, like she's not bringing content either.

4:16 It's not her job. It's not her job. It's your job to bring the content. Certainly, we want a girl who can reciprocate that. And if she doesn't, she's going to get blown out because you guys are the prize. You guys are the selectors. But overall, from a fundamental kind of base level statement, I stick with that. It's your job as the man to bring the content, to control the conversation. Even when she brings up some shit that isn't conducive to attracting women, such as politics, religion, abortion, these topics that are controversial and you run with it.

4:49 Guess what happens? She gets bored and she blames you for boring her. Female psychology 101. They're going to bring up boring shit. They're going to do boring shit. They're going to test you. And if you run with it, it's nobody's fault but yours. You could complain all day long. It's her fault. She was boring. She was an idiot. Yeah. Okay. That's fine. Where does it get you? Gets you nothing. It definitely doesn't get you laid. It doesn't get you a second date with her. So go ahead.

5:16 Play the blame game. And Eric, I'm not saying you are playing the blame game. In fact, your questions are oftentimes some of the best. But I want you to kind of wrap your head around this. It's your fault that you weren't entertaining her. Now, I do understand. And believe me, I probably understand this better than anyone. Because I've been on a myriad of different dates. And some girls are more interesting than others. Some girls, it's like talking to a freaking pizza box. Right? There's nothing. It's cardboard.

5:42 It's boring. It's so unbelievably dry. And she has nothing to say. And you're like, oh my hell, I cannot believe I'm stuck with this girl for the next two hours. Which, by the way, is the reason I would always work eject mechanisms into my dates. I would take them to some place first, like a lounge, sushi, a drink. And then I would always preemptively give myself the excuse to abort mission if she wasn't making the cut. I'd say, hey, listen, I can only meet for a little while.

6:10 Let's just go see if we click. Let's see if we have chemistry. And then if we do have chemistry, I can extend out the date and take her somewhere else. But that's why you always want to work that in. Because as all of you guys know, some girls are as boring as watching paint dry. It's like no personality. And I hate to say, but that's oftentimes true with girls who are super hot. There's just nothing there. Like, oftentimes they're superficial. Because why do they have to develop their personality when they're given pretty much a free hand in life?

6:36 The reality of a super hot woman, and this is a podcast episode I'll do in the future, is completely different than our reality, bro. Like, you have no fucking clue. Just wait. I'm actually going to try to bring on some hot girls onto this podcast and interview them. Just to let you know, like, they're living in a completely different order of reality. So when they go on a date, they don't feel like they have to bring much because they've already pre-qualified. They're hot as fuck. But with guys like us, they do have to bring content.

7:03 They do have to bring conversation. But again, ultimately, it's your responsibility, right, to bring it out of them. Because some girls don't even know how interesting they are, especially the really hot ones. They've never really been tested. They've never been asked these questions. They've never been pressed to continue conversations. They just have guys falling all over themselves, bending over ass backwards to do whatever she wants, and that's her reality. But I'll tell you what, she's going to get way more attracted to you when you demand, demand isn't the right word, when you elicit those kinds of conversations and personality out of her.

7:39 But going back to my point, brother, it's your responsibility. It's your responsibility to bring that conversation out of her, and she's expecting that. Remember, the masculine job is to lead. The feminine job is to follow. So if she leads and she brings up boring shit and you go with it, essentially, she's leading. She's now in the masculine role, and you're losing her attraction. And that includes her doing things like checking her cell phone. Why is she checking her cell phone? You're not bringing good conversational topic.

8:08 Okay, so that being said, how do we bring good conversational topic? Well, the myriad of podcasts that I've done on the topic, there's tons of things you can talk about. Storytelling, mentoring, push-pull, cold reading, the cube, gambits. There's all kinds of things that not only I talk about in this podcast, but more specifically, I teach in my three-month coaching program. You go through that, I guarantee you every guy who's ever gone through that, he doesn't worry about what to talk about, right? Eric is a little bit more new, and brother, you're going to get more content as the weeks continue.

8:42 But I encourage you to watch the Mark Singh video anthology. Gambits is what the chapter is called. That's going to give you probably about 150 things to talk about. So if you haven't watched that yet, check that out. That comes with your coaching package. But in the meantime, okay, so it's your job, guys, to bring the conversational topic. And if you don't, once again, she's going to get bored and blame you for boring her. I cannot say that enough. Okay, so first and foremost, we have that laid down.

9:07 Now, going into frame control, we understand the basic premise of frame control is this, is that you are leading, you are controlling the frame. And the frame, as talked about in other episodes, I love talking about this stuff, is the interpreted meaning of the interaction. In other words, who's controlling it? That's really what it boils down to. We can get into the weeds and talk about all the little nitty-gritty specifics, but it's basically who's controlling the interaction. So when you're speaking to her and she gets on her cell phone, ultimately, it also could be a test.

9:40 Now, women's job, and I want you to listen very carefully, women's job is to test you. Their job is to see if you're going to be affected by her and therefore, and this is really important, are you going to be affected by the outside circumstances of your life? Because if she can get a rise out of you, if she can control the conversation on you, if she can manipulate the way the date is going and make you lose control, that means that you're going to lose control in all other areas of your life.

10:11 Because if she can do it to you, that means your boss can do it to you, your friends can do it to you, society is going to do it to you, and you are a weak beta cuck, unattractive. That's why women, literally unconsciously and anthropologically designed, to test you, to see if you're willing to put up with that behavior. Now, usually, I'd say probably even more than 50% of the time, she's just bored. Your job is to bring something up, get her attention. Hey, hey, so did you hear this thing?

10:39 Have you heard of the cube? Hey, oh, this reminds me of this. Hey, what's your earliest memory? What would you do if you had $90 million? What would your best friend say is the coolest thing about you? What's the best day of your life? I mean, come on, there's so many things to talk about. Once again, Eric, check out that chapter, Gambit, in the Mark Singh video anthology. But when she's testing you, even when you're doing that, like you're bringing awesome content, and she's trying to test that.

11:02 You can tell it's a test, right? You can kind of tell with chicks it's a test. You need to control the frame. Okay, so we're talking, things are going great. She's like, ha, ha, ha, and she checks her cell phone, right? Pretty disrespectful. What I'd do, probably, if she was doing that often, and I've done this before, I'd take a picture of her with my cell phone. I'd text her, and I'd say, best, period, first, period, date, period, ever, exclamation point. Best first date ever, as she's sitting there on her phone, a picture of her.

11:31 Now, you have to do this in the right way, because as I say in the little video sample that I have on my coaching page, you can never, under any circumstance, get emotionally butthurt or negative when it comes to interacting with women. Because if she does something disrespectful, and you get butthurt about it, and you challenge her in a way that has negative emotions within it, she is going to get pissed, you guys are going to get in a fight, it's going to end, it's going to be the worst first date ever.

11:59 A lot of guys misinterpret frame control as being this stubborn asshole who's, like, controlling, and they think that means being in control. No, it's being in control, not being controlling. It's being completely imperturbable, unmovable on your inner balance point, your inner state of centeredness. Being calm, cool, collected, joking around, hey, no big deal. But at the same time, as I always say, you're not to be fucked with. If she's blatantly disrespecting you, and you have determined, I'm bringing a conversational topic here, I'm doing an awesome job.

12:35 She is just horrible, man. She just has the attention span of a small monkey on hydroxycut, a chinchilla on cocaine. This chick is just all over the place, no attention whatsoever. It's like, come on, chick, here we go, here we go, here we go, pay attention. Some girls are like that. Believe me, I've dated many of them. Well, at that point, you need to let her know you're not to be fucked with. And doing that picture, texting her, hey, best first date ever, hopefully she laughs and says, I'm so sorry.

13:01 It's just da-da-da. You'd be like, it's okay. But here, let's try to be present. What do you say? So tell me this. Tell me this. What was the best day of your life? Like, what's the best thing that ever happened to you? And she goes on and on, and then you control her, putting her into those good emotions. See, here's the thing. You can be disagreeable, but your disagreeableness, if that's a word, is leading her into a better situation than she even knows she could have by just going with you.

13:25 So oftentimes, if girls are doing some shit that I know is not good for me, it's not good for her, it's not good for our date, I'm going to call her out on it, once again, without emotion. And I'm going to lead her into a place where she's going to have a better time than she was checking her Instagram page. Once again, you can be disagreeable, but you be disagreeable without negative energy. Now, another way to do this is to simply call her out on it.

13:50 You can say, hey, listen, I know we're on a date right now. I understand you're really concerned about your dogs. But in my opinion, you know, we're here with each other. We're trying to get to know each other. Wouldn't you agree? It's probably best that we just talk and we kind of lay off our cell phones. So what you do there, and I do this to women all the time, and this is so powerful, is you rationalize with them in a very non-negative way, completely calm, completely rational.

14:16 And you say, hey, wouldn't you agree that X, Y, Z? Wouldn't you agree that essentially what you're doing is pretty disrespectful? Now, you don't say that. Let's be socially savvy here. But you explain to her, so hey, listen, we're on a date. I'm taking you out. We're doing this right now. We want to get to know each other. Isn't that right? She's like, yeah. So wouldn't you agree we both put our cell phones away? I mean, you can see right now, my cell phone's been lighting up the whole time.

14:41 I haven't checked it. Because I'm trying to get to know you. So wouldn't you agree that's probably the best thing to do? And she'll be like, yeah. And listen, when you do that, you get her more attracted to you. Because you're showing, once again, those alpha male qualities, which is you're in control, but you're not controlling. You're willing to be disagreeable. You're staying on your inner balance point. And you're letting her know, hey, little girl, this kind of behavior will not stand with me. And I'll tell you, in the first two weeks of dating a girl, she is going to test you like no tomorrow.

15:10 Why? Because the first two weeks is when the relationship dynamic is established. She's finding out what kind of guy you are. And just like when you go to the Home Depot and buy a piece of plywood, you need to lean on that thing and test it to make sure it's strong enough. So she's going to be testing you, particularly in the first two weeks. If you let her get away with anything, she is going to know that she can get away with that in the future.

15:34 And that is when the relationship dynamic is established. You see these guys where the woman wears the pants, where the dude's a little beta cuck. And I dare say I've been that dude before, as have many of you guys. You see that all the time. That's established in the first two weeks. Because her job is to test you, test you, put the pressure on you, see if you pass it. Now, frame control is the biggest tenant to my teaching because of this reason. Because if you're not leading her, if you're not in control, if you're not imperturbable by her drama, by her acting up, by her testing you, she's going to lose attraction for you.

16:09 You're not going to get sex. And she's going to take the masculine role. And even if you do get sex, you're not going to get it for long. Because if she takes the masculine role, you're in the feminine role, she loses respect for you. And this is why, guys, and I'm sure many of you have experienced this, they stop having sex with you after a while because you got put in the beta cuck role. And they do this right from the first date. Now, if you have a strong frame and you're a legend right from the beginning, they're not going to test you that much.

16:34 Like, honestly, in the beginning, when I first got into this, I'd get tested. But as time went, I barely got tested at all. Like, almost not at all. And when I did, I was kind of excited. I was like, yeah, I get to pass this. And that's what I talk about again on that video on my sales page is what girls say. They're going to say mean things to you. They're going to do disrespectful things. How are you going to handle it? Okay, a couple of things you could do, as I mentioned, is rationalize with them.

17:01 Hey, wouldn't you agree? X, Y, Z. Another thing you could do is change the topic. Hey, hey, so check this out. And just lead her. Just take her there to a better topic. I guarantee you, talking about the cube, and if you guys haven't heard of this, I suggest you look it up. I'll do a podcast on it in the future. But doing the cube, which is a psychological test that women absolutely love, or messages in water, which is something I've talked about. Or a myriad of other things that I teach on this girl is going to be more entertaining to her than Instagram.

17:34 Instagram is like a 6.3 level of dopamine hit entertainment. Brother, you need to be hitting her with nines the whole time. And when you do that, she's not going to look at her phone. Like honestly, as I was getting really good, the phone doesn't even fucking come out. Now one quick tip regarding the phone, one thing you can do too, this is a little bit petty, but I used to do it, is I would specifically text all the girls who I was talking to that week like an hour or two before I went on a date.

18:02 And the reason I do that is because I would want my phone to light up and be going off while we were talking on our date. So I'd put it on vibrate or I'd put it where it just flashes. It wouldn't actually make an audible sound because that would be distracting, but I'd set it right there on the table and it would be pinging, pinging, pinging. And she's thinking to herself, man, he's really popular. He's probably talking to a lot of girls, which you are. So, and it can give you the excuse, like, look, I haven't even looked at my phone.

18:27 Like you see it going off. I haven't even checked it yet because I'm giving you the respect of focusing wholeheartedly on you. Wouldn't you agree that's what we should do today? Yeah, I do agree. Perfect. When you're able, again, to disagree with her in a way where you rationalize her into a way of handling the situation that is better than the current way she's doing it, you just mentored her. You were just like her father saying, hey, sweetie, don't do that. Come on over here. This is better.

18:53 And she says, okay, daddy, that gets attraction. It's because you're controlling the frame. So this is really important, Eric. You know, probably what you did, brother. And once again, you're going to get more education as you go through the course is you just weren't entertaining enough. And if she was being blatantly disrespectful, you probably should have sent her that text where you took a picture of her and said, best date ever. Or, you know, maybe she was trying to create conversational topic herself. Maybe she was trying to get you to ask her questions about her dogs.

19:21 Or maybe you could have asked her questions about her dogs. So tell me about your dogs. What's the coolest thing they ever did? What do you love most about them? You know what's cool about dogs? This, that, and the third. By the way, quick thing. And this is just right off the top of my head. This is exactly, I don't know if I'd say this on the date, but between boys, I'd say this. Did you know, in World War II, the Russians actually trained dogs to go under tanks in order to find food.

19:45 So they trained these dogs to run, whenever they saw a tank, they trained them to go run under the tank to find food. Well, what they did is they put bombs on their backs, pretty fucked up. And then when they went under the tank, it like triggered the bomb and it would blow up the tank. And they did this to the Germans in World War II during some of the battles they had out there on the Eastern front. So I thought that was pretty interesting. But there you go right there is you have to have the ability to just bring up shit the way I just did.

20:12 When I say dog, can you just talk about a dog? Can you tell an interesting story about your dog? Ask her questions about her dog. Bring conversational topic. That is your duty is to control the date, be in control, but not controlling. She is invariably going to test you when she does test you. I suggest you listen to my episodes frame control or hop on over to my website and watch that video. There's several good tips that I drop in that one. But once again, you know, it's your job to entertain her when she tests you, you bring her to a better place.

20:44 Even if you have to confront her, be disagreeable and rationalize with her in a calm way, no emotions, never, ever any negativity, literally under no circumstance. Are you allowed to be negative with a woman? The second there's even a drop of that negative energy, you're going to get blown out. I can be completely disagreeable with you and not be negative. Absolutely. A hundred percent. Just be like, no, I'm not going to do that. You know, get out. Like I talk about in that video, I say, if she's being really like a gigantic bitch and she's just being super negative and she's in her pain body, as we call it, I'd turn the car around and I'd be like, beat it, get out.

21:21 I'm not hanging out with you. I'm not going to be in this negative energy. And then you'll have to see what I say in that video. It's pretty funny. So check that out when you have a chance. So that's it for me, guys. That's how you deal with a girl who's going to invariably test you on the first date. It's your job to control it. And if she's getting bored, it's your fault. It really is. So guys, on Wednesday, I'm dropping an awesome podcast about how to get inner power and inner strength and how to radically boost your confidence.

21:48 This is so unbelievably important. I want you guys to return back. And then on Friday, I'm dropping another one about money management. This has been something I've been really into over the past few months, have been studying it endlessly. And I feel that I have enough knowledge now about it to be able to teach you guys some awesome tricks on how to manage your money. And if you're feeling like, oh, I don't want to listen to that money. I don't want to deal with that, then you, my brother, are the one that really needs to listen to it.

22:16 Because if you're avoiding the topic of money, if you don't like it, then you need to go into it. Remember, that which you're avoiding is exactly where you need to go. And to you guys who want to make more money, who want to save more money and be wealthy, I have some awesome tips that I've myself been using. These aren't tips that I created. This is from other people who are much more successful than me when it comes to money. But I've found that my income has just been skyrocketing since implementing these and yours can too.

22:42 And you don't even need to be an entrepreneur like me. You can just be working a job. This teaches you how to manage your money, how to take the money you have and turn it into more money. Money is like little soldiers that goes out and gets friends and brings them back to you. And that's the way you need to use your money to your advantage. So again, on Wednesday, I'm talking about how to get radical, deep inner confidence and inner power. And then on Friday, I'm talking about how to manage your money.

23:06 So please stay tuned for that. And once again, if you do want to check out my website, my coaching offer, or even jump on that free one-on-one consultation with me where I find your limiting belief systems, what it is you're struggling with women, and how we can create a roadmap for you to get to what you want in the easiest, quickest way possible, sign up at my website, coachmarkzing.com, click on coaching, slap the red button, fill out the goddamn, turn it in, and I will email you and you and I will set up that call.

23:35 It's really fun. We really have a good time. I meet a lot of you cool champions and I get to hear what you're all about and I get to offer you solutions right there and then. So if you're procrastinating on that, pull the trigger, brother. Trust me, it's worth it. All right, guys. Thank you again for listening and I will see you in the next episode. Out.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.