What to Talk About With Girls IN THE FIRST 30 SECONDS OF OPENING!

0:00 Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What's up, guys? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UNP. I really do appreciate you. If this is your first time riding with me, welcome. What I try to do here is give the best information in the shortest amount of time possible. And if you've been riding with me for a long time, you know what to do. That's right.

0:31 Smack yourself upside the head so that you fly upward through a skylight, land on your feet, and have absolutely no cuts on you because you are a champion. And for those of you who have left me a review, God bless you. God bless you. I love you guys, man. I have a tattoo on my neck with your name on it if you left me a review. Now, for those of you who didn't leave me a review, I am going to hit you so hard you're going to fly upward through the skylight and get cuts all over yourself and be damaged for life.

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1:31 I will send you some awesome shit. The Conversation Sniper, three texts to build massive attraction in women and guide to the female orgasm, as well as a bunch of videos. And of course, I'm going to get your face slapped onto the side of my car with a logo over it that says The Ultimate Champion. All right, so we're going to talk about what the hell to talk about with girls in the first 30 seconds. First 30 seconds, hardest part, man. From opening to the sticking point to get the conversation to hook, it's usually the hardest part for most guys.

2:05 And I get asked all the time, hey, bro, can you give me like a protocol? Can you give me a step-by-step system? Could you give me a blueprint that I could use for every single girl that I talk to and just take her through that? Don't even have to think about it. It's going to be the easiest thing ever. But as I say that, you and I both know that doesn't exist. Why it doesn't exist is because we can't predict what the girl's going to say.

2:29 As much as girls are sometimes predictable and as much as they do often say the same things sometimes, other times they don't. And you'll never know how she'll react. So you being able to think on your feet is the most important part of this game. Now, I had a client ask me, you know, how do I get better at thinking on my feet? How do I get better at this? And the trick to it is to basically practice in your alone time. So if you're sitting in your room as I am now filming this podcast and I look over and I see a green lamp on my table, can I talk about a green lamp in a fun and interesting way?

3:03 Now, this is one of those green lamps. I'm literally just doing this off the top of my head. This is one of those green lamps that like the typists use in the 1920s and they have like the little green visor on and they're like, yeah, see, today in the sports, the horse, rocky road, beach, cigar in the sports arena. Dude, I'm just pulling this out of my ass. So can you just do that? Can you just talk about things in a fun and interesting way? Now, let's go ahead and look over to the right side of my desk.

3:31 I have a Spartan helmet, a real bronze Spartan helmet, most sickest thing ever. Can I talk about that in a fun and interesting way? You're damn right. I could, man. I could talk about that for two hours. The battles that all the Spartans went through, so sick. But you get what I'm saying. You want to be able to just look at something where you're at right now, whatever you're doing. Maybe you're in your kitchen. Maybe you're driving. Maybe you're taking a walk. Maybe you're in the gym.

3:57 Look at something right now and tell me, would I be able to talk about that inanimate object in a fun and interesting way? If you can't, then there's your homework. You just look at things and you talk about them, literally. And this is something easy that you can do, that you can practice while you're driving, while you're on your off time, while you're taking a break. It's just be able to tell stories about things, be able to make observations about things, ask questions about things. And you've got to be able to do this quickly so that when a girl says to you that she works at Nabisco and she works in the Wheat Thins department, can you just freaking talk about Wheat Thins in a fun and interesting way?

4:35 Just go. Just talk about it. For me, I would say, God, I love Wheat Thins. I could never just eat one. If I open a box, the box is done. Even the family size one. And then the whole rest of the day, I just feel like I have this brick in my stomach. You are a brick layer is what you really are because those things are so damn addicting. Boom. And it doesn't have to be that great. Like I'm just fucking talking out of my ass right now.

4:58 I did not prepare any of this. But as long as it's a little bit better than, oh, you work at Nabisco and the Wheat Thins, that's cool. Right? It just has to be slightly more interesting. How do we make it more interesting? We practice and practice and practice. Okay. So this next question was asked by a client named Robert. What is up, Robert? And I thought it was a really good question. And he said, you know, do you have a protocol when opening girls the first 30 seconds kind of thing?

5:26 So I'm going to go over that, but before I go into that, he actually said something I want to read to you guys that I thought was really cool. He said, I see life like standing on an escalator that is going down. You are just getting by if you're climbing at the same pace as the escalator. So you're putting in the minimum to get by. Your life is getting worse if you put no effort and write it down. Or if you're working on improving yourself, you're climbing faster than the escalator and making progress.

5:55 Every day I try to climb a little bit higher. I really like that analogy. And it's because of that, he put the effort in to go ahead and post that in our Facebook group that I wanted to go ahead and make this podcast in honor of my boy, Robert. He's one of my favorite clients. And answer his question about the first 30 seconds. Okay. So step one, what I usually do. Now, this is just me, you guys. There's many different ways to skin a cat. So if you've heard something different from another pickup artist, go ahead and relax a little bit because there's many different ways to do it.

6:28 This is just me. Okay. I always say, hey, um, that's just my thing. Hey, uh, real quick. Or I say, hey, uh, I have to get out of here in a second. But, okay. Now that I have to get out of here in a second is what's called a false time constraint. The big thing that you guys worry about is monopolizing too much of her time and being like an inconvenient salesman that tries to pin you and like take up a bunch of your time. Well, when you say to her, I have to get out of here in a second, but that gives her the clue that you're not going to hold her there.

7:01 Now, what I might also say is, you know what? I have to get out here in a second. My friend Julie's waiting for me over at Starbucks, but, okay. So what I do is in the beginning, sometimes I'll drop a little hint that I have girlfriends. My friend Julie is waiting for me at Starbucks, but, and then I'll ask the question. So it's a very slight addition that's a psychological additive that makes her feel like, okay, he's going to get out of here in a second.

7:26 He has girlfriends. He's going to meet one of those girlfriends right now. He's probably safe. I'm probably safe to talk to him. Okay. So that's usually how I started. Now, as I've spoken about in other podcasts, you want to do either a direct or indirect opener. Now, a direct opener is my preference, and that is to state my intentions straight up. Hey, real quick, I got to get out here in a second. My friend Julie's waiting for me at Starbucks, but I had to come over and talk to you.

7:56 I thought you were really cute, and I just wanted to meet you. What's up? What's your name? Okay. So it's direct. Look, I'm interested in you. I think you're pretty, and I want to get to know you. I might also say, hey, I thought you were really pretty. Wanted to come over here and see if you were interesting. I'll say that a lot, especially when I get a lot of value in the club, and she's seen me with pre-selection. I can do that little qualifier, like a qualifier is where you make her work for you.

8:23 So when I set the precedence that I'm coming over here to see if you were interesting, it's not like, hey, you've won off me already. Here's my balls in a knapsack. Let me put the wedding ring on your finger, and then you can rule me the rest of my life. No, no, no. It's like, hey, I thought you were cute. I wanted to come see what you were about, or on that note, I'll sometimes say, who are you? Hey, what's up? I saw you standing over there.

8:46 Wanted to come meet you. Who are you? Right? And that's when you have really good, you know, vibe going, good status in the club. Okay. Now there's indirect. You simply ask her a question, right? Like, hey, where'd you get that olive oil? I noticed you have Starbucks in your hand. Where's the damn Starbucks around here? Opening girls in a bar. You could be like, hey, who's the coolest bartender in here? Which bartender is cool? Because that is my first time here. Which bartender is cool? So something like that.

9:14 Ask her for advice. Ask her a question. Maybe get her opinion. I used to do these opinion openers all the time. Hey, let me get your opinion real quick. My friend who's a girl, she actually couldn't come out tonight because her boyfriend was making her stay home. Now the crazy thing is, is that he's actually coming out, but he's making her stay at home because he's jealous and he doesn't want her coming out. That's pretty messed up, huh? And then girls will always be like, oh yeah, it's so messed up.

9:40 I've never date a guy like that. Blah, blah, blah. Gets your foot in the door. Personally, I've been doing this for a long time. I like to just be direct. Hey, I thought you were cute. What's up? What's your name? Gets your foot in the door. And when you do it with confidence, they don't question it, man. And they know what you're up to. So they could be like, oh, I really appreciate it, but I have a boyfriend. Cool. He's a lucky guy. Have a great day.

10:01 You just saved yourself five minutes of trying when you try to go like under the radar, indirect, where you could have just been direct. Be like, yo, I think you're pretty. I want to see what you're about. What's up? And then she has the opportunity to either say, yeah, I'm into it or no, I'm not. Okay, so what I often do after that is I'll have another question loaded up and ready to go. Now, typically, you guys are opening girls in the same kinds of venues, right?

10:28 You're doing it in the supermarket. You're doing it at the coffee shop you always go to. You're doing it at the gym you always go to or the bars you always go to, right? We always go to the same places. So it would be wise of you to have some observations and or questions lined up for those venues. For example, I go to a bar where there's like dollar bills taped all over the ceiling and like stapled to the walls. People can like put graffiti on them, little messages, and then they staple the dollar bills to the walls.

10:57 Well, I always ask about that. So I'll be like, so hey, what's the deal with these dollar bills everywhere? Is that like a tradition? Like how can I get one up, right? And I've been there a hundred times. I know what the deal is, but she doesn't know that I know. And it's a good question to ask about the environment, keeps the conversation going, helps you get to that social hook point. Now, in a previous podcast, I taught you guys about how to answer the typical question of what do you do?

11:25 Also, how to ask her what she does. So lately what I've been doing is I've been using this COVID thing as a benefit to my questions. So I'll often say, so how have you been dealing with this COVID thing? Like after she answers the dollar bill thing, like whatever the hell she says, I don't care. Then I ask her, I'll be like, so how have you been dealing with this COVID thing? Did it affect your job? And then she'll either say yes or no. And then I can ask her what she does.

11:51 Now, if you listen to my previous podcast about the three-step process to answer the typical questions, first, what you do is say something funny. I'm a dolphin trafficker. I'm an ass model. I work at the zoo and I pick up penguins that fell over because the penguins can't pick up themselves. Ha, ha, ha. Then you tell the real thing of what you do. And then you tell a funny story or an inspiring story about it. Well, we do the same thing back to the girl. And as you guys know, I always accuse girls of being an ice cream man.

12:21 So I'll be like, so how are you dealing with this COVID thing? Are you, did it affect your job? And she'll be like, no, not really. And I'll be like, that's right. You know what? I recognize you. You're the ice cream man. You're Denver's ice cream man. And I'll tease her about being an ice cream man. I always do that. And then she'll say, no, no, I'm not. I'll be like, what do you really do? Okay. She's a whatever cocktail waitress. Then I'll ask her some questions about that.

12:43 Then I'll let the conversation drop and I'll show her that I'm okay with an uncomfortable silence. Uncomfortable in quotes. Not uncomfortable for me, uncomfortable for her. And then naturally, after she's been asked what she does, she's going to ask you what you do. Then I say, oh, I'm a famous ass model. My ass is on, you know, different billboards all over New York city. It's famous on seven different continents. Don't pinch my ass during any point of this conversation. Cause if I get a bruise on it, you're going to put me out of a job and I'm going to be unemployed.

13:14 And then she like tries to pinch my butt. Then I tell her what I really do. I'm an NLP coach. And then I tell her the story about how I had anxiety in Japan. And the only thing that got me over it was hiring an NLP coach. I was so moved by what he did for me that I too became an NLP coach. That's what I do. Okay. Dude, that's the first five minutes right there. And what you did is you start it with the false time constraint, question observation, or stating your interest.

13:42 Then you have another question lined up and another question lined up. So really the point of this is to tell you guys, you need to have more than one question lined up. So you should have like three and those questions should be environmentally based. You're going to the gym. Hey, do you notice they just changed the membership thing? Hey, what's going on with the new, uh, you know, the new workout machines they just got in. Hey, did you notice that because of COVID-19, how stupid is it?

14:09 And this is true, dude, with my gym, they're making us wear masks while we work out. Are you kidding me? So we all look like Bane walking around with masks on. It's kind of sick though, dude. Like I have this really dope mask that kind of looks like Bane from a Batman. And like, I have like a shirtless shirt or a sleeveless shirt on. I'm working out kind of sick, but it's kind of hard to breathe. So I'll talk to girls about that. So what do you think about this mask thing?

14:33 Pretty stupid, huh? And they'll always be like, yeah, oh my God, it's so dumb. And so you have questions ready. It's your job as the man to prepare the questions and lead the conversation. Now you want to lead it in a way that gets attraction. Like my three-step process, for example. In addition to that, you have been practicing talking about random things, Spartan helmets, lamps, freaking a closet full of sweatshirts. You need to be able to talk about that in a fun and interesting way. So that when she brings up some random shit, like she's like, oh, we were just at the hockey game.

15:07 You need to like be able to go with that and be able to talk about hockey in an interesting way. Ask interesting questions about it. Tell a story. For me, once again, this is off the top of my head. Hockey game. I would always get headaches because it's like the ice is so bright and everywhere else is so dark. It was just like looking at the sun the whole time. And I would always get these really bad headaches when I would go to ice hockey games.

15:30 Have you ever experienced that? Boom. Perfect question. Right there. So that's how you do it, boys. I hope that helped you out a little bit with the first 30 seconds. Look, the best way to get good with opening women is to do what I call approach and eject. And I've done a podcast about that in the past where you just approach her and eject, approach, eject. And then what you do is you stack. Just like I talked about in today's podcast, you stack more questions on the back of your initial question and you try to push it further and further.

16:01 And the more reps you get, the better you're going to get with girls. I give my clients assignments, open and eject with 20 plus girls a week. It's a permanent homework assignment that we all do. And I do it too. I'm opening girls all the time, even hand planted fatties just for practice. Okay. So you want to get good at this. Then you just open, open, open. If you have to eject immediately, that's fine. You're not feeling it, but slowly you start to push it more and more.

16:28 The next thing you know, you're in a conversation. Then the next thing you know, she's getting attracted. And then you're like, oh shit, now I got to snag the phone number. And you're starting to get phone numbers. So all it takes is reps. It takes a continuous practice. Make this a daily part of your practice of getting better with women, opening and ejecting, opening, asking several questions and ejecting, or opening, asking questions and trying to push it until you get the phone number. Once you get this part of seduction down, bro, it's like your funnel is going to explode with women.

17:02 You're going to have so many women in your life. Like literally you'll, you'll get really anal about the vetting process. A lot of girls aren't going to make the cut. You're going to cut them out immediately. In fact, you're going to get so good, you're not going to even ask for some girl's numbers, even though they'd be willing to give them to you because you just don't have the time. So this whole cold approach thing is a massive, massive way to get tons of girls into your pipeline.

17:26 Yes, it's the hardest way, but once you master it, it's over. It's literally pussy on tap. So keep practicing boys. Hit me up if you have any questions. And once again, if you leave me a review, hit me up at coachmarksingh at gmail.com and I'll send you all kinds of good stuff. All right, guys. Thanks for listening and I'll see you in the next episode. Bye. Bye.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.