Why You MUST ADD VIDEOS to Your Dating App Profiles on Hinge, Bumble, and Tinder

0:00 Welcome to The Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up, gentlemen? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP. As you can see, I am sitting here in our new house. This is kind of a makeshift office. They're actually finishing our basement right now. We're going to get a specific sound studio just for the UMP. But right now, I figure, show you the beautiful mountains of Colorado.

0:38 We are living literally right next to the beginning of the Rocky Mountains. Right behind me, if you know anything about Colorado, are Red Rocks Amphitheater. So I live in a town called Morrison, and this is our beautiful new home. So if you're listening to this on audio, go check out the video on YouTube. This is my beautiful view from our office. And I just kind of made shift this recording studio for the time being, but it's going to be a lot better. I'm getting a specific studio made with soundproofing.

1:08 I'm getting this like sick black wall made with like neon lights in it. It's going to be so sick. But for now, you can't do much better than the Rocky Mountains themselves. We got so lucky getting this house, and it's a testament to the law of attraction because we actually had 10 other people competing to get this house. And we just kept intending we have this house, we have this house dualistically working together to try to attract this house. And we do believe in the law of attraction, and there is a lot of scientific evidence for it, where we were able to attract and manifest this dream home, really, right on the edge of Denver, between Denver and the Rocky Mountains, where supposedly there were absolutely no houses available.

1:52 But there was this new housing development that started, we put in our bid, and then what happened is it actually appraised for lower. And we said, hey, we're walking away unless you give it to us for that appraised price, and they did. So we got massively hooked up and beat out those 10 other people in a really competitive market, at least at the time that we applied. So gentlemen, today we are going to talk about why you should be using videos in your dating apps. So when it comes to the dating apps, the more she can learn about you, the more she's going to build that all-important trust, connection, and rapport with you, and the more likely she is to reply to your messages, reach out to you herself.

2:34 So I'm going to give you some tips about the kinds of videos you want to put up, how I want you guys to be confident but also be funny and make them entertaining, because nothing is worse than a boring video, which is why in my podcast, I always try to drop as much critical knowledge as possible in the shortest amount of time possible. You ever listen to those podcasts where it's just like nothing but advertisements? Yes, I advertise my stuff, but I try to do so minimally because people's attention span is really short.

3:02 So we have to consider this when dealing with females on the dating apps. The dating apps are basically the TikTok or the Instagram of dating, which means people are swiping, they want to be entertained, they want to be interested. So you have to keep your shit funny, you have to keep your shit interesting in order to keep her attention and to increase the likelihood of her actually reaching out to you and engaging with you and, of course, going on to date with you. So, obviously, you need to have good pictures.

3:30 We've talked about that in other episodes. I cannot suggest enough hiring a professional photographer to help you take the best pictures possible and only using the best three, four, possibly five pictures that you can get. One bad picture is basically shitting in the river of your entire picture database. So if you have one bad picture, just assume all your pictures are bad. So if you're questionable about one picture, I'd rather you have three really good pictures than three good pictures and two decent ones and maybe even a bad one because that will ruin you.

4:07 This also applies to videos. If you don't have good delivery, if you're not confident, if you don't have good tonality, then you may want to skip it. But if you're confident in, let's say, how you look, you're confident in some of the things that you do, you have some cool videos of some experiences you may have had, or you can edit it in a way where it makes you look high value, then videos are highly suggested. I suggest using two to three videos, which, of course, communicate all those high value traits.

4:35 What are high value traits? Ambition, confidence, having a good life, being the leader of men, having adventures, risk-taking, doing cool sports. If you're ripped, doing something where you show that you're ripped. If you're popular with women, and if you have women in your life, you out with girls having a good time. These things all communicate those high value traits that we want to communicate to women. And most importantly, even above everything I just said, is making women laugh. Okay, this shit has to be funny, or at the very least, it has to be entertaining.

5:12 And let's say, for example, you have a video of you snowboarding and just completely wiping out. What I'd suggest you do is get into the TikTok Instagram mentality, which is get to the point as soon as possible, keep her entertained, and keep the shit short. What you're doing are shorts, okay, of who you are and what you do. This isn't the time to be like, hi, my name is Josh. I enjoy long walks on the beach and little puppy dogs and ice cream. Skip that bullshit as you're walking down the beach with a fucking sweater tied around your neck, with your hands in your pockets and your bare foot, and you're like contemplating on the meaning of life.

5:49 All that bullshit is for the 80s. And it's really funny because my mom and my stepdad actually met through this kind of service, which was called Great Expectations, where you literally filmed a video of yourself on VHS tape, of course. And my stepdad, his name is Ed, and he's like, hi, my name's Ed. I work in so-and-so place, and I enjoy doing this and this, and I'm into sailing. Skip all that bullshit, bro. That's 1980 shit. We have to accommodate for people's short attention span. Now, you may think, well, doesn't she want to know about me?

6:23 She does, but you're going to subcommunicate those things, and you're going to subcommunicate them by showing rather than telling. So you're showing a cool lifestyle. You're showing charisma. You're showing humor. And in this episode, I'm actually going to give you a video idea with a script to record, and you can record it 50 times if you have to. Edit it. I certainly suggest getting a professional editor to edit it out. You can find people on Fiverr to make it interesting. Hell, you could put background music to it if, of course, the dating apps would allow that without any copyright infringement.

6:57 But, dude, you have to think marketing. When I go on Instagram, I learn this very quickly. You have to get to the fucking point. That's why some podcasts that always advertise right in the beginning, which I do too sometimes, but I also don't do it. That's why they're not successful. The reason why my downloads are so high is because I get straight to the fucking point, at least compared to other podcasts, and I give you guys good information. I keep you entertained. I'm funny, and I just get down to it, right?

7:25 It's kind of like having sex with a girl for the 10th time. You're like, God damn, do I got to go down on her and suck her tits and kiss her neck for 15 hours? Can I just put it in? And eventually, you get to the point where you just want to get to the damn point, and that's what you have to do on these videos. Keep them entertaining, engaging, have a hook point, and get them laughing as soon as possible. So, like I said, go through all the videos of your life, and God knows, you go through your cell phone, you're going to find 75 fucking thousand different videos that you could cut up and edit to make interesting and to demonstrate the kind of champion that you are.

7:59 But here's a video that if I were to get back on the dating apps, this is what I'd do. I would introduce myself and talk about myself, but not in the typical way of Ed in 1980 with his sweater draped over his shoulder, talking about how he likes tennis and golf and sailing and being as boring as watching paint dry. I'm not going to do that. What I'm going to do is I'm going to create a funny video introducing myself, taking her through my house, because if she can kind of get a feel for me, get a feel for the kind of place that I live in, she's going to get more comfortable with me, and the chances of her actually reaching out to me go up significantly.

8:37 So, what I do is I get my iPhone, or God forbid, if you use an Android, I'm just fucking with you, everybody, relax. Don't hyperextend your anal chakra, but I use an iPhone, okay? I would just film myself, like literally holding my phone, walking through my house, filming myself. Now, I talked about this a couple years ago in the Dating God series, I think it was called, and it's like Black Op Tactics or something like that. But what I do is an introductory video of myself filming myself walking through my house and saying the following things.

9:08 I would say, hey, what's up? My name is Mark. As you can see, I'm really, really responsible because I haven't burned down my house yet. This is my house. Over here is my dog. Now, if you ever meet this dog, prepare yourself. She is so cute, obviously, as you can see, that rainbows are literally going to shoot out of your butt if you meet her. So, prepare yourself for that. Then I'd cut boys to going into the kitchen, and I'd basically be like pouring cereal into a bowl or like chucking lettuce into a bowl.

9:37 And then I'd say this. I'd say, as you can see, I'm an absolute master chef. My cooking is to die for. In fact, you'll die, reincarnate, and then die for it again because clearly I'm a master chef. I'm a culinary half genius because my salad here only comes out good about half the time. Now, as you can see, I've already made her laugh several times. Hey, my name is Mark. This is my place. As you can see, I haven't burned it down yet, so I'm very responsible.

10:02 Then I cut immediately to the kitchen. I'm also a master chef. As you're like making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich or pouring cereal or making a salad, which of course is funny in itself. And then you can say something, as I did, such as, my cooking is to die for. It's so good. You'll die, reincarnate, and then die again. Or you can say something like, my cooking only comes out good half the time, which is why they call me a culinary half genius. And then you've also said about your dog.

10:29 And if you have a pet, you have a bird, a cat, a dog, a frog, a fish, a cricket, whatever you have, introduce that fucker and say something akin of, he's so cute that when he gives you cuddles, rainbows are literally going to shoot out of your butt. It's a little bit painful, so prepare yourself for that kind of trauma. That's going to make her laugh. Then what I say to wrap it up, and bro, this should be about 30 seconds. Okay, really quick, and I'm cutting it up.

10:56 Then I would say something akin to, so, hey, if this video made you chuckle and you think we might have some things in common, hit me up. I'd love to talk to you. And be really genuine in that instance. Kind of smile and say, hey, hit me up. I'd love to talk to you. And then press stop. Okay, so it's just that simple. This is my house. As you can see, I haven't burned it down yet. This is my cricket. He's so goddamn cute. When he jumps on your shoulder, rainbows are going to fly out of your ass.

11:17 As you can see, I make a mean peanut butter and jelly. And be careful, because sometimes I even toast the bread. Yes, I am that extreme with my culinary half genius. Then you say, hey, listen, if you feel like we'd relate, hit me up. I'd love to meet you. Talk to you soon. And then press stop. You upload that shit. It is going to get you so many conversions. We've been testing this. And this has raised conversion rates by about 60% to 80% just by having videos. Think about it.

11:46 You guys feel a lot better about me when you can listen to my podcast and get to know me personally. Rather than just looking at a bunch of pictures on Instagram where I have, like, cool quotes or anything like that, the best is video and the best is long-form content. Now, obviously, we're not going to put long-form content on the dating apps. That's kind of more like the date itself. But this is an indoctrination. This is a top-of-funnel way for her to get used to you, to build rapport with you, and want to see you more.

12:17 So I strongly suggest you do a video like that one. Couple other videos of, let's say, you swing dancing, right? Somebody takes a video of you swing dancing with a girl. Doesn't mean you're making out with her. Doesn't mean she's your girlfriend. You're just dancing and showing some value. Like, you got some cool moves, you dip her, spin her out, fucking flip her in the air and spin her on your finger and then launch her across the bar. That kind of high-value shit that shows you're fun-loving, girls like you, you have lots of girls in your life, or you're out on a sailboat or you're playing your sport, right?

12:49 If you're really good at baseball, you have a video clip of you hitting like a Grand Slam home run. We want to kind of brag a little bit, but at the same time, if you can, throw in some self-deprecating humor. So one thing I like to do when I was doing videos is I have a video of me crashing on my mountain bike, and then underneath I said, as you can see, I'm a world-class athlete. So it's kind of making her laugh, but at the same time, this dude's downhill mountain biking, he could take some shots, he can laugh at himself.

13:19 So it's all those high-value traits that you want to communicate, and here's a huge, huge tip. Before you record any kind of talking head video, before you go through your house filming the video of you on your iPhone or Android for you Android users, warm up your voice. Warm up your voice. The worst thing that can happen is you coming off as unconfident with a bad voice, which, by the way, is all dictated by your belief systems. If you don't believe you're enough, that's going to be communicated in how you speak and how you hold yourself, so that's a whole different podcast episode.

13:55 But what you can do to kind of hack the system is to call a bunch of people and or open and eject with a bunch of people who don't matter. Get your voice warmed up. One thing I really like to do, too, is call some girl who likes me and get into that I'm a champion kind of frame and then record the video. And you could do it 100 times, right? Like, if you record this video of you in your house and you're like, hey, what's up?

14:19 My name is Mark. This is my home. As you can see, I'm really responsible because I haven't burned it down yet. That literal five-second clip, you can record on one video, and then you can do the next section in your kitchen. Here's my kitchen. As you can see, I make a mean peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Watch out. Sometimes I even toast the bread. Yes, I'm a culinary half genius. That's a clip. And then you can introduce your dog, your rat, your snake, your freaking flying chinchilla, whatever it is.

14:48 That's a clip, and then the final clip, and you paste them all together so that you don't have to sit here like I do recording 20 minutes straight because it's not for everybody, and it's very fucking difficult. This is the first time I'm recording in my new quote-unquote studio. I literally have a stack of trash cans holding up my camera. I've got this microphone hooked up to this little side desk that was, like, falling over, so I had to put this paper cutter thing on top of it just to keep it down.

15:17 I got my light propped up on some ghetto-ass fucking file cabinet. You just wing it, bro, and it looks decent. Obviously, I'm getting a professional studio made where everything is going to be permanent, but even me, in the 11th hour, I'm like, yo, I got to film a podcast. We literally have moving boxes. Right behind the camera, there's a bunch of Home Depot boxes that I have yet to unpack. So if I can make this look decent with literally five minutes of just ghetto setup, then you could do the same thing.

15:45 Editing does a lot. It really does a lot. So get videos on the dating apps. Hit up, girls, with the templates that, of course, a little bit I've shared on this podcast, but more importantly, my three-month coaching program. When you mix videos with good pictures, with good messages from my messaging templates, bro, your results go up like 80%, 90%. You are going to absolutely crush the results that you used to get when you had some ghetto pictures and you were just hitting up chicks with, like, hey, girl, how are you?

16:16 Okay, we need to up our game. We need to think marketing, and we need to think this. What's in it for me? What's in it for me? That's the only thing she's thinking about, with them. What's in it for me? She's like, is this going to be entertaining or is this going to waste my time? Is this guy going to make me smile or is he just going to suck value out of me like every other guy on these dating apps? If you could give value, give humor, make her laugh in the ways that I just explained, while at the same time having a couple other videos showing that ambition, passion, having a high-value lifestyle, being a dude who gets after it and fucking gets results, that shit is going to get you results.

16:54 Because you're differentiating yourself from the rest of the sea donkeys who don't utilize these kinds of things, such as video. You have to have video on your dating apps, so start thinking about it. Go through your videos, hire an editor off Fiverr, make this shit viable for TikTok or Instagram. That's the way I want you to think. The get-to-know-you stuff, like Ed with the sweater around his neck walking on the beach, that shit's out, okay? We need to entertain her, and that's how I need you guys to think.

17:23 All right, gentlemen, I hope this has been beneficial for you. I hope you got some value out of it. I do appreciate you listening. Please stay tuned for the next episode because I have a gigantic announcement. Absolutely huge. I've been working on this thing for the last three months, and I'm going to unveil it to you in the next episode this coming Monday. So stay tuned for it. Can't wait to see you there. And I will see you in the next episode. We'll see you in the next episode.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.