The Brilliant Time Management Principal of "In Time" & "Through time"

0:00 Welcome to the Unapologetic Man Podcast, the only podcast that's all about self-improvement, confidence, success, women, and being a man without making any apologies for it. What is up guys? Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the UMP. I really do appreciate you joining me. If you've been writing with me for a long time, you know what to do. Smack yourself on the ass so hard when the concussion hits, your balls fly up, and hit the brim of your hat. If this is your first time listening, welcome.

0:31 What I try to do is give the best information in the most succinct way possible. We are just going to jump straight into the content today. Not going to ask you for reviews. Not going to ask you to sign up for my free one-on-one breakthrough session. Nope, we're just going to get right into it because we are talking about time management. And in respect of your time, I'm going to get straight to the point by teaching you the NLP concepts of through time and in time.

1:00 All right, so to begin this lesson, what I want you to do is I want you to point at where the future is for you. That's right, right now. Go ahead and point. Are you pointing directly in front of you? Are you pointing to your right? Where are you pointing right now when you are pointing to your future? So the premise of this states that if you are pointing directly in front of you, you are what NLP calls through time, which means you are in the present moment.

1:27 You are more in the now, right now, at this very moment listening to this, than you are thinking about the future. If you point to the right, if you point to the left, somewhere that's off to your periphery, you are what's called in time in this NLP perspective, which means you are more thinking about the future. You are making plans. You are, for all intents and purposes, more solution-based, more numbers-oriented, more, if we could say this, right-brained. Okay, so if you point to the future and it's directly in front of you, you are more, and this is just at the moment, you are more in your left brain.

2:04 Okay, so let's first talk about the left brain. The left brain is creative. It's in the present moment. It's more concerned with now. It's coming up with creative solutions to problems. It's more focused on the creativity, which could also be said the feminine, than it is focused on the masculine. If, on the other hand, you point it to the right, and you are what we call in time, you're more focused on the numbers. You're more focused on procedures. You're more focused on what's going to happen in the future.

2:35 For example, building your business automation system to create more sales in the future to make yourself successful. Now, many of us get stuck in either one or the other. Okay, so what's the typical person that gets stuck in what we call through time? Which means that you're more focused on the creative side, which means you're more in the present moment. You can imagine it like your timeline. Let's say your life is a timeline. It's literally going through your body, and you're facing the future. Okay, this means you're in the present moment.

3:08 Time is moving slower for you. You are creating through feminine energy, it could be said, although there is some masculine in it too. But you're in a creative state. When you are in that state, you are more like an artist, more like a musician, more like somebody who creates things. Who is often late to meetings because they're in this creative, energetic, enthusiastic state where they're not focusing on time so much. They're focusing on the present moment and they're focusing on what they're creating. Okay, so once again, this is like artists, musicians, people like that.

3:44 We could say hippies more kind of land in this spot. Now, people who are in time, which once again is more solution-oriented, more numbers game, more procedures, they kind of see their timeline as running perpendicular to them. So think about it this way. Your timeline is a long, narrow road. When you're through time, that means you're more in the present moment and your timeline is kind of like going through your body and you're facing your future directly in front of you. You point to your future.

4:13 It's out in front of you. When you are in time, let's go ahead and flip that timeline perpendicular so that it runs in front of your eyes from left to right. And you look at the future as a distant point, usually to the right. I'm willing to bet the majority of you pointed to the right for those of you who are in time. Okay, so in time, once again, is procedure, solution-oriented. This is people who are really into math, people who are really into science, people who are very successful in their business as far as creating systems, creating to-do lists, getting shit done and knocking them out one by one.

4:47 These are also people who tend to be more stressed, people who tend to be more anxious, people who can't, for example, let go and meditate for 40 minutes every morning because to them, it seems like a waste of time to go into the present moment and stop thinking about the systems, the solutions, how to better myself. So there's two different perspectives and the person who masters his life knows how to use both and that's what I want to talk about in this podcast. Here's the big problem for a lot of you guys.

5:17 A lot of you guys are either one or the other. You're either stressed out all the time. You're constantly thinking about the problems of your life. You're constantly thinking about the future, which means that you're predominantly in that left to right timeline called in time. Those of you who don't get shit done, who may be sometimes be called lazy, who are addicted to porn, who are addicted to video games, oftentimes addicted to food, but who are many times very creative and come up with these awesome creative solutions, just don't know how to put them into action.

5:49 You are oftentimes too much in through time, which means you're in the present moment. The timeline is going through you. I always imagine it going through like my heart, right through the center of my heart, moving in a way where the future is directly in front of me. The person who is successful understands this concept and understands how to get into both, not necessarily 50-50, but both based on what's best for them. All right, so me being the only person here who I can speak about with any authority, I'm going to tell you how it works best for me.

6:21 So basically, my business is an entrepreneurial endeavor, right? So half of me has to be creative about half the time, which means I need to be through time. I need to be in the present moment. Think about creative solutions. Think about new ways to market my product in a creative way that gets into people's emotions. Know how to reach people. Sales is oftentimes very through time. It's very left brain. It's very emotionally based. But setting up the sales calls, doing automation, making sure that my program hits on every level, managing all the different clients I have in this gigantic spreadsheet where it's color-coded.

7:00 I know exactly where each guy is in the program. I know exactly what his NLP processes are. It takes about 50-50 to be able to run a business like this. And I'll tell you something, a big secret, being extremely good with women is about 70-30 when it comes to being through time, which once again means being in the present moment, being in that flow state, just talking to girls in a funny way and not caring about what happens. And then 30%, I would say, is about in time, where you have to manage all your girls, make sure you text them on time, make sure you have a spreadsheet, which tells you what you said to who, because this is going to be a big problem you guys are going to run into.

7:41 Manage your phone numbers. Manage your week, because honestly, when you're dating three, four, five girls, it is a logistical nightmare that you have to manage. But the guys who are most attractive to women are about 70-30, 70 in the flow state, being creative, fucking around, having fun, not being in the future, not thinking about, am I standing correctly? Am I saying the right thing? Does she like me? No, just being in the present moment. And the present moment, and this comes from Buddhism, means no thought. It's mindlessness.

8:13 Mindfulness, they always call it mindfulness, should be called mindlessness, which means you're not thinking so much. And that, in my business, is when I have the best creative breakthroughs. When I'm just meditating, I have no thought, I'm through time, which once again means time is going through my body, meaning I'm in the present moment, then these ideas come to me. That's why, guys, when you're in the shower, which in my opinion is a form of meditation, ideas come to you. Because the thinking mind, which is the mind that's in time, stops.

8:46 It shuts up. And in my opinion, moving water has some energy behind it. It's a whole different podcast. But this is why creative ideas come to you. Now, the guy who's really good at being an entrepreneur, the guy who's really good at managing girls and getting them attracted to him, as well as the guy who's really good at life in general, the skill set of living includes managing time. He understands these concepts. He knows when to get into through time and when to get into in time.

9:16 Okay? So, once again, through time is the present moment. In time is thinking about the future and making plans. So, what happens to a lot of you guys is you're too much in one or the other and it thwarts your progress. So, I want you to ask yourself right now, what is the main issue that I have? Is the main issue I have keeping my promises, getting shit done, being a go-getter, being a boss, being a doer, being a producer? Then I can tell you with utmost confidence that you are too much through time, meaning too much in the present moment, too much in that feminine creative energy.

9:50 Now, some of you guys are stress cases. You're always anxious about the future. You feel, and try this one on for size, a distant sense of threat of something going wrong in the future. So, you're constantly in time, meaning you're trying to solve the problems of the future. You're not coming back to the present moment enough and letting yourself relax, be creative, playing video games, taking a bath, masturbating, having sex, riding a roller coaster, surfing, mountain biking, snowboarding, skiing, hunting. These are all through time activities that relieve the stress caused by being in too much in time.

10:30 So, what happens is we don't manage our times correctly, and while we're trying to be in through time, our other mind is saying, no, no, you need to be in time. Easy example. You guys are meditating, and all you're doing is thinking about your day. I can't stop thinking, Mark. I can't stop thinking. Well, a simple shift, and this is literally a visualization I want you to do, of flipping the timeline, either from going through you, which means the past is behind you, the future is in front of you, and flipping it.

11:00 So, horizontally, so that now it runs perpendicular to your vision, future on the right, the past on the left. Once you realize that you can do this, and you can literally visualize it and flip it according to what you have to do at that time, then you can start taking control of where your mind is and where your mind is trying to go. When your mind knows that it's creative time, it's meditation time, it's relaxation time, I want you to literally visualize the timeline running front to back, coming from behind you, going through you, and then extending out in front of you.

11:36 That's when I want you to be in creative time, meditation time, unwinding time, when it's time to get shit done. Let's say you have to do your taxes. I want you to literally visualize that timeline flipping out, being left to right. And what you can do, too, is you can slow down the minutes by almost like on your cell phone, how you hone in on something. Think of it as a ruler to which you are panning in on, and then the hashes extend outward so that time gets longer.

12:03 You can literally do this both with in time and through time, and you will manage your time much better that way, and you decide what times of the days are for what. So when I first get up, I'm immediately in time, which means I'm trying to get shit done. I get up, I take a shower, I drink my water, I do my whole morning routine, I make my bed, I floss my teeth. Okay, so I have that whole routine. Then what I do is I flip the timeline so that it's going through me, and I meditate.

12:31 And while I'm meditating, I have that vision held in my head. Mark, you are through time. Now, the in time mind, the one that wants to get shit done, make plans, solve problems for the future, he's going to try to pipe up. But when I've made that pact, when I've made that agreement with myself that I am in through time, it's not going to be as loud as a yapping noise because I know that being through time, and here's the thing, that sharpens the sword of being in time.

13:01 This is the way you sharpen yourself is from going back and forth between the two. But four, you're going to do anything in time, which means getting shit done, making plans, being procedural. You want to go through time and be in the present moment for a while, be creative, even unwind by watching some TV, going on a walk, being in a meditative state. Then when you go into your in time tasks, doing your taxes, for example, you can knock it out like a champ, and you're not going to get distracted by those through time kinds of things.

13:33 Going back to the taxes example, you are in time doing your taxes. You know you've got two hours to do this. Let's kick some ass. You put on YouTube, you put on some techno. I like to listen to the Awakenings Festival, which is this cool techno festival that happens in the Netherlands. I just really like it. I put that on. Then I'm like doing my taxes, or I'm doing payroll, or like I'm like constructing somebody's NLP process, and I need to be super fucking focused. And then that YouTube suggested list comes up.

14:01 Mark, check out the 2021 Supercross highlights where Eli Tomac does a fucking whip over the triple in Ken Roxton's face. I'm going to be like, oh, I want to click on that one, bro. But I know because I'm in time, which means getting shit done, I'm not allowed to click on that. When I go back into through time, then I give myself X many minutes, X many hours to do that kind of shit. So what happens is when you consciously schedule for yourself when I'm going to be in time and when I'm going to be through time, you get far less stress, you get way more shit done.

14:33 And at the same time, you allow yourself to unwind. You allow yourself to be in the present moment. You allow yourself to be present and mindless so that you don't have so much stress building up inside of you. So what I do is I literally schedule my day. First part of my day, in time, getting shit done. Next part of my day, which is meditation, through time, being in the present moment. Then what I do is I eat my breakfast and I go to the gym.

14:59 I'm in time. Get the reps done. Do your sets. Knock it out. Then I drive home and I listen to meditation music. Boom. I'm back through time. Then I come to the office. I'm in time. I'm getting emails done. I'm dealing with my client questions, everything like that. Then I go up and play with my daughter through time. So it's this constant back and forth of being in the present moment to being in the future, to making plans, to unwinding, to having a state of mindlessness, to having a state where your mind is full of solutions and procedures and problems even.

15:31 So when you schedule this for yourself, you don't wake up in the middle of the night with stress. You don't have so much anxiety inside your heart because your through time self knows that, hey, the in time guy will deal with it. Right now, you're in through time. And listen, in time guy, I'm sharpening the sword so that when we start cutting up those problems, you can actually cut it up with efficiency because that's the way it works. If you're constantly using a knife and trying to cut up something, eventually it's going to dull.

16:00 Well, the through time, which again means being in the now, is sharpening that knife and you need that too. Life is all about balance. It's all about going from nothingness to something, meditation to progress, mindlessness to mindfulness, we should say, or I should say getting shit done. Procedure to no procedure, masculine and feminine. It's that flow. It's the moon rising and falling. It's the tides rising and falling. It's the sun going up and down. It's the tree growing and dying through winter. That's what life should be and that's how you make progress.

16:36 And also, because you're allowing yourself to go into that mindless state of through time, which again is creativity, then you get creative ideas for your business. You get creative ideas with women. You get creative ideas to make yourself happier. And you can literally ask the universe, if you will, God, if you believe in God, your subconscious mind, if that's better for you, please bring me the solution. And I guarantee you the solution will come when you're through time, meaning being in a state of mindlessness. People who are too project oriented, too solution oriented, too in time, which means again, getting shit done, procedures, go, go, go, go, go, get it done.

17:16 They almost never have these creative insights, which would benefit them greatly if they just fucking slowed down, took a step back and had balance in their life. So this NLP concept of through time and in time is extremely important. What I want you guys to do is think about this, say, hey, when am I in time? When am I through time? Or you could say, when am I getting shit done, being procedural, being solution oriented, highly masculine? And when am I being highly feminine? Or am I being that feminine enough?

17:47 Am I being enough in the present moment? Do I meditate? Do I let myself relax? Do I even let myself, I don't know, play some video games at the end of the night just to unwind? Because I tell you, when you unwind, this is when the knife gets sharpened. This is why it's so important to take vacations. It's so important to go out, you know, on the weekends and have a good time. So important to treat yourself and unwind. Because not only could you die tomorrow, but also if you want to be ultra successful, you have to sharpen the knife.

18:17 You have to take the iron out of the fire and let it cool in the water so that it gets even stronger. And too many of you guys are either on one or the other. Some of you guys are super lazy. You never get shit done. And a lot of you guys who, like, want to sign up for my coaching but keep procrastinating, you're too through time. You're too in the present moment. You're not thinking about the future. You're afraid to make the commitment because of what could happen.

18:39 You're not procedural enough. Those who sign up, I know when you sign up, you're in a state of being in time. Procedural, let's fucking get it done. I'm committed. Tell me the solution. And then what I do is in my coaching, I teach you this concept so you can apply it not only to your life to be more successful, but also apply it to women to be more successful with women. Because, again, with women, it's about being in that flow state but at the same time having just enough procedural, solution-oriented, XYZ kind of structures in place to manage all these chicks.

19:12 Because I'm telling you, when you're dating four or five chicks, bro, like, you can lose them so quickly if you just fuck up and tell the same girl the same story twice not knowing. So you do have to have those procedures in place. So I wanted to introduce this to you guys as a concept of managing your time. If you're too stressed, remember, you're too much in time. You're too procedural. You need to step back and let yourself unwind a little bit. That's what sharpens your knife.

19:39 If you're not getting shit done, if you're lazy, if you're a procrastinator, for example, you're too through time, being in the present moment, not thinking about the future enough, not making plans, not facing your fears and going after your goals like a fucking man should. So what I do is I literally schedule out every day. It amounts to about 50-50 with me. It depends exactly what I'm doing. For taxes, for example, taxes are, like, almost all in time. Whereas, again, with women, it's, like, 70% through time.

20:08 So it depends what you're doing. But on your day-to-day schedule, especially entrepreneurs out there, you need to plan this or you're going to be totally off kilter. You're going to be too stressed or you're not going to be producing enough. You're going to be criticizing yourself because you're not doing what you should be doing. So this all mixes into it. And this is a really good concept to know. Once again, I know I've said it a lot. I feel like I've repeated these words a thousand times.

20:32 But through time means the timeline is going through your heart or through your eyes even. It's going front to back. Behind you is the past. Right in front of you is the future. And that means you're in the present moment. In time means the timeline is going left to right. The future is on your right. The past is on your left. Some people, it's reversed for the most of us. The future is on the right. And then what you're doing is you're very procedural-based, very masculine, very solution-oriented.

21:01 What I want you to do is consciously flip it depending on what you need to do at that particular time. Just imagine in your head going, whoop, flipping, flipping back. And then you know, okay, dude, I'm in this. So I'm not going to go to that until it's time to go to that. And then when it's time to go to that, when it's time to go sit down and meditate after you've been checking emails, when you flip it and now suddenly the timeline is going through you, you're not going to be thinking so much about those emails.

21:26 Because your subconscious mind knows that it's time to think about the emails when I'm in time, when that timeline is perpendicular to me and I'm working on solutions, I'm working on procedures. So you convince your mind to do that and it's extremely effective. All right, boys, if you found value in my podcast, I very much appreciate a review. If you want to get a free breakthrough session with me, sign up on my website, CoachMarkSing.com. Click on coaching, fill out the goddamn slap in the biscuit, and you and I will get on that one-on-one Zoom call together.

21:56 I drop podcasts on Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and I'll tell you what, the best podcast is when I'm highly through time. Just in the present moment, creative, just flowing, and that's where I certainly am right now. But I'm going to wrap this up and I'm going to get into time by saving it as a raw file, sending it to my editor, loading up all the writing that has to go along with it, all the tags, everything, getting it ready to be published. So I'm going to change from through time to in time in order to get this shit done.

22:23 And I dare say this is why I'm so good at what I do is because I understand how to flip between these two and use each of them to my advantage to have a successful business and, most importantly, a successful life. All right, gentlemen, thank you again for listening and I will see you in the next episode. We'll see you in the next episode.

This transcript was made automatically, so a few words may be off.